How did you spend the most difficult time in your life?

Born in a rural family with many children, the eldest daughter of the family was sensible earlier, and she was never really relaxed and happy before the age of 30. The hardest time is probably two periods: adolescence and the years before my father died.

At the age of 9, after my parents built a new house in debt in my hometown, my father had an operation due to illness and rested for several years, which made the family's economy worse. In the poorest time, my mother couldn't even afford a bag of salt, and many times the fried rice at home was oil-free.

My father is in poor health, his income is limited, he is preoccupied and grumpy every day. My mother takes care of the whole family and does all the farm work. Poverty and fatigue made her particularly irritable. It is common for two people to quarrel and fight. My mother ran away from home and even tried to kill herself by drinking pesticides. Brothers and sisters are like frightened birds all day, afraid of being abandoned.

When I was in the third grade of primary school, my brother began to live on campus. I can't afford the living expenses at home, so let me bring him food from home every morning. I remember one winter morning, I walked into the campus with a jar of enamel surface, which happened to be the time for my self-study in the morning of my senior year. A girl who was in a hurry to go out for breakfast rushed downstairs and knocked me to the ground. Noodles in the enamel jar spilled all over the floor. Thinking that my brother had no food, I cried on the spot. My brother saw it from upstairs and immediately ran down to help me up and comfort me. Then pick up the enamel jar that rolled out of the distance, take it back to the classroom, and finish the few mouthfuls of noodles.

I began to live on campus in the fifth grade. In order to help my parents share the pressure, I hardly eat breakfast until the second day of junior high school. I ate a lot at home at noon and saved dinner at school. In the fifth grade summer vacation, my brother and I went to my uncle's house in the city, watched the colorful neon and traffic in the city, washed our hair with delicious shampoo every day, and ate a meaty meal for half a month. When I got home that night, looking at the dim light in the room and the meatless dinner, I felt sad, lost and self-pitied. I kicked the cupboard in the corner, and a person wept silently in the room.

My deepest memory of adolescence is hunger. It was my own idea to share my parents' worries and save money secretly. For a long time, they didn't know. The difficulties of life have required them to do their best to face them, and they have no time to take care of their children's food and clothing, and they are unable to do so. I don't blame them. I just told myself to work hard so that those who have been deprived of half their lives can have a good and happy old age. If one day, I become a mother, I hope I can be a solid backing of Ta. Ta doesn't have to share her parents' worries from an early age, but grows into a sunny and mentally sound person in a loving family.

The year my father was diagnosed with cancer, I had just paid off my college loan and had some savings on hand. I worked in a depressed 886 company in naked resignation for three years, and I was about to take a break and start over when I received my father's medical report. I found the company leader at the first time and hoped to withdraw my resignation report. Because I have to prepare treatment fees for my father, I can't live without a job. The company leader refused my request, saying that the company is not a leek garden, and whoever wants to come can leave if they want. I can resign, which shows that I am not loyal to the company, and the company cannot leave a disloyal employee.

During my tenure, I felt that I was a backbone and dedicated to my work. I am a valuable person in the company, and the company is short of people. The boss has no reason not to want me. So I got up the courage to call my boss and tell him about my family, hoping to stay. The boss said coldly that the company is not a charity. There are many people with cancer now, and you are not the only one who has difficulties.

Returning to the grass shattered my self-esteem, and the boss's attitude made me feel the cruelty of life and people's hearts for the first time. Since we can't go back, we must grit our teeth and move on. I went back to see my father and kept the secret of his unemployment. I watched him live in the ward and went back to the provincial capital to find a job.

At that time, it coincided with the graduation season, and the number of college students in the city ranked in the national TOP3 list. In order to find a job as soon as possible, I will go to any large job fair, submit my resume online every day, and never miss any interview opportunities. In order to save money, I don't eat breakfast. For lunch and dinner, I cook noodles with cabbage and Laoganma, and seldom eat meat. I can't sleep every night. When I called my father, I pretended that nothing happened. I told him that I had a good job recently and I got a raise. At present, my savings are enough for his operation. Don't worry.

I lost 8 pounds in half a month, and my legs are getting softer every day. After half a month, I joined a media company with a basic salary of 1800, and other income depends on the manuscript fee.

Because it is an industry media, I don't understand the industry during the probation period, and it is difficult to start without the elderly. At the end of the adaptation period, I am worried about being fired and automatically apply to run the market. I will go to poor areas that others don't want to go to, and I will take care of the hard work that others don't want to do.

I took the 1 1 hour bus to interview a small boss. On the way, I met with heavy rain and landslides. Hungry waiting for help on the national highway, I almost peed my pants. Visiting customers in Xiangxi in rainy and snowy weather, I couldn't sleep in a hotel without air conditioning, so I went to the bus station at 5 o'clock in the morning and drove to the next city. Go to the market during the day and work overtime at night to write articles. I have a record of three days and two nights without rest, and I have also had a bad cold on business trip. It took 26 days to travel around Yunnan 13 and interview more than 30 people in the industry. A good meal is common. In order to catch up with the time, we took risks on the cliff highway in northern Shaanxi with visibility less than 50 meters; During the rainy season, I was busy outside wearing soaked socks. After finishing writing at night, I tried to dry my socks with a hair dryer in the hotel with my eyes open.

During my father's hospitalization, the medical expenses of at least 1000 yuan per day weighed on me like a mountain. When you are exhausted, cry quietly and cheer up. I tell myself every day that my father is still alive and I am lucky. Tell myself in my heart that I am great and I am not defeated by life. When I feel uneasy and depressed, I can cure it through a lot of chicken soup for the soul.

Six months after operation, my father reexamined the metastatic focus. I don't believe it. I took the film to the top three hospitals in the provincial capital without telling my father, and asked the most authoritative experts for diagnosis. After the experts confirmed that it was a transfer, my mind collapsed. Go home from work at night and open the door with the key. My hand hurts, but the door won't open. Call your most trusted and opinionated friend with tears in your eyes. Half an hour's phone call will calm you down. Then I did my father's ideological work and began to continue my treatment.

In order to earn more money, I resigned from the provincial capital and came to Shanghai. Reluctant to spend money, I bought a local hard seat ticket, went to Shanghai for more than 20 hours, interviewed during the day and spent the night in a youth hostel with dozens of people at night. I found a job soon, rented a small house of about 6 square meters, settled down, saved all my money to treat my father.

Until my father died a few years ago, every time I went home, I had a hard seat for more than 20 hours, or I couldn't bear to buy food on the train, only eating steamed bread and instant noodles.

No love. First, the work is busy and the circle is small. Second, I have a heavy burden. I am not in the mood to fall in love, and I don't want to drag down or kidnap a kind person.

I never think that suffering is the wealth of life. If my family is well-off and I'm not hungry, I won't feel inferior for my height and I won't have gastrointestinal problems as an adult. Maybe I can be familiar with temperament, read a lot of poems and books, and become a lady who is both internal and external, which is envied by many men.

But in the first half of my life, I couldn't dominate. I just tried my best. I didn't slack off, I didn't complain, I chose to be responsible and be a dynamic person. Although I am very tired, I am proud of myself.

If one day I become a boss, I will definitely try my best to help the employees in trouble, so that Ta will not despair in the most difficult time, and still believe that human nature is good, there is love in the world and the world is worth it.