How to understand the special role of environment in negotiation?

We often have this experience. When we talk about things at a friend's house, we always have a guest's mentality, so we always look cautious when we speak. But when you receive friends in your own home, you are free.

In other words, the host's mentality will naturally form an advantage, which is the so-called "home advantage." Although it belongs to non-verbal factors, it can enhance the expression effect of words, so we should make full use of non-verbal factors and master the art of communication.

Place belongs to the natural environment, but once it is attached to some social force and can exert influence, it becomes a social environment. For example, leaders often invite subordinates to talk in the office when they find problems.

The office is the place where superiors work, so when subordinates come here, it is easy to associate with the relationship between superiors and subordinates, thus creating a mentality that must be obeyed. In this way, what was originally an equal conversation, because of the participation of the place, a special social environment, has become beneficial to one side, making equal parties active and passive. Usually, the active party will have the advantage of "commanding", but this is only a psychological difference, and it is by no means bullying others. On the contrary, if leaders want to enhance trust and friendship, they will go out of the "leadership effect zone" and go to staff quarters, restaurants, clubs and other places to let the topic run freely.

It can be seen that nonverbal factors, like invisible magnetic fields, have extremely powerful special effects.

Therefore, when you are negotiating with others, if you want to gain an advantage and convince others, you must choose a favorable environment for yourself, so as to enhance your speaking effect unconsciously. In addition, we should make good use of the environment and enhance the speaking effect with the help of the immediate objects.

At a banquet, a director talked about "setting suspense and solving suspense" in film literature creation.

When I asked questions, I picked up a wine bottle from the table and said, "If the bottle cap of wine is opened too early, it will smell of wine." This convenient object, used to illustrate the problem under discussion, is often very convincing.

Sometimes, when discourse communication is in trouble, you can also use what is in front of you flexibly to resolve it, thus turning passivity into initiative. Once, a little girl sold dried beans at the market, only two yuan per catty, but the buyer counteroffered one and a half yuan. When the two were speechless and deadlocked, the buyer stared at the fresh dried tofu with his eyes and took out three or five brand cigarettes from his pocket. The little girl immediately said shrewdly, "That fifty cents, you've been fighting for so long. In fact, all you have to do is smoke a few fewer cigarettes! " This sentence made the buyer stunned, and then took out four dollars to buy two pounds of dried beans.

In the above cases, the little girl skillfully borrowed what was in front of her and achieved the purpose of persuading the other party.

Xie Anyuan, a native of A Jin, lives in seclusion in Dongshan. Later, the court ordered him to be a mountain official one after another, and he could no longer live in seclusion, so he had to reluctantly become a subordinate of Huan. At this time, someone sent Huan a Chinese medicine, one of which was called "Polygala". Huan Wen took this medicine and asked Xie An, "This medicine is called polygala tenuifolia. Why does a thing have two names? " At that time, Long Hao who joined the army was present. Without waiting for Xie An's answer, he said, "It's easy to explain: if you can't live in seclusion, it's a long-term ambition. If you have become an official, you will be a grass. "

Xie An know Long Hao is pun intended, hinting something, showing the appearance of shame. Ancient Confucian scholars were most particular about the source, when to live in seclusion and when to be an official.

Long Hao borrowed herbs to hint at Xie An; He lived in seclusion as a cloth, which the court could not recruit again and again, and his worth doubled, so he naturally had great ambitions; Once an official is tainted with vulgarity, he will be as cheap as dirt. Huan Wen said to mediate between the two sides:

"Hao Shenjun's explanation was not malicious, but also insightful."

This is another story. At the end of Qing Dynasty, there was a merchant inn opened by Wang Sankai in Chenxi County, Hunan Province.

One day, Hong Kong businessman Li Gongzi lived in a single room in an inn. When he woke up, he found that his 50 taels of silver had been stolen. There was no one else in the inn that day, so Shang Hong Li Gongzi suspected that the boss Wang San had stolen it, so he reported it to the county government. Wang San thought he had no witnesses and no property, so he denied it.

Dong Zhongfu, the magistrate of Chenxi County, is smart, resourceful and decisive. From Wang San's look, he realized that Wang San was very likely to steal, but he suffered from no evidence. So Dong Zhifu secretly sent two capable officials to the inn and said to the proprietress, "Your husband admitted that the guest had lost money. Now let's take this bag of money and you hand it over honestly. " Dong county magistrate believes that if the stolen evidence is obtained, the defendant cannot deny it. Unexpectedly, the proprietress is more cunning than Wang San and pretends not to know.

In fact, the county magistrate Dong had already arranged the second strategic plan and told the county magistrate that if the defendant's wife refused to admit that she was rich, she could be taken to court. The proprietress went to the lobby and pretended not to know.

Dong followed the county order of the second coup.

Arriving at the inn, magistrate Dong is preparing for the second interrogation. The county magistrate asked Wang San to reach out and write a word "win" on his hand with a red pen. Then he said, "Go down the steps and get some sunshine. If the word has not disappeared for a long time, then your lawsuit will win. "

When Wang San's wife came to the classroom, she saw her husband sunbathing under the steps. She couldn't figure out what was going on and couldn't talk it over with her husband, so her heart was full of doubts. When she claimed that she didn't know about the money in class, she suddenly heard the county magistrate Dong ask loudly, "Do you still have the word' win' in your hand?" Wang San quickly replied: "Yes, yes, the word' win' is still there!"

Because the pronunciation of "win Yu" and "silver" is similar, Wang San's wife has a guilty conscience. Since her husband admitted that the money was still there, she dared to hide it. She kowtowed and repented again and again: "I'm sorry, sir, but fifty taels of silver are still in the toilet in my room, and there is not a penny left." Please send a servant back with me to get it. "

When Dong county magistrate pretends to do it and asks if the word "win" in your hand is still there, say "yes, yes". In the eyes of Wang San's wife, who didn't know the truth, the play was misunderstood as "Is your money there?" According to Wang San's wife's psychology, since her husband has confessed, there is no point in hiding it, so that I can distinguish right from wrong. Therefore, if we want to confuse the fake with the real, we must make a fuss about the word "fake", which is mysterious, difficult to distinguish between true and false, attractive and almost difficult to distinguish. Only by doing this can we be superb, advance and retreat freely, make people invisible, and make people not be inferior to others.

This is a concrete manifestation of the formation of the language environment.