The conflict between the elderly in China and the children of American immigrants

Old people in China who live in the United States are prone to depression and melancholy. (American Overseas Chinese News)

The old people in China and the children of American immigrants have conflicts in living customs and cultural cognition, which even lead to tragedy. Such incidents happen from time to time. How to adjust the adaptability of the elderly to American social life is worth pondering. (Overseas Chinese News) According to the report of the Overseas Chinese News of the United States, a Chinese-American man shot and killed his in-laws who came from China to visit relatives at his home on the evening of 13 local time, which aroused people's concern about the situation of China's elderly visiting relatives in the United States. Old people in China and children in the United States have conflicts in living customs and cultural cognition, which even leads to tragedy. Such incidents happen from time to time. How to adjust the adaptability of the elderly to American social life is worth pondering.

concentrate

In America, do old people go in? Send a consortium? Someone picks up garbage.

According to Guangzhou Daily, Mrs. Li, a Chinese who is over eighty, lives in Flushing, new york. What she has to do every day is to have a free lunch with her wife in the casino, earn a little money by the way, and then hitch a ride? Send a consortium bus? Go back to flushing.

? Send a consortium? Has become an old man in China? Alternative American life? . It turns out that many American casinos attract China guests through China Travel Agency in order to develop customers and improve their popularity. In order to attract these elderly people, casinos not only provide shuttle service, but also provide free drinks and lunches, and provide gambling funds. Although it takes two or three hours to travel, it will take several hours. Work? But you can earn six or seven hundred dollars in cash a month.

There are old people in China who collect bottles and cans in the United States.

In Flushing, about 60% of the elderly in China live below the poverty line. Although the United States also provides various welfare benefits for the elderly, it is difficult for many elderly people in China, especially new immigrants, to apply for them. Even if? Lucky? Upon application, the monthly living allowance only ranges from 400 to 600 dollars.

So-called? Poverty is about change? Many old people have to open sources and cut costs. Mrs. Tang from Taishan, Guangdong, lives in Chinatown, San Francisco. Now she basically lives on free food distributed by community organizations. She asks around for free food distribution points every day, and goes to the queue to get food as long as her legs and feet suit you. In addition, many elderly people in China even pick up garbage because of their livelihood. In Flushing, you can see many old people in China picking up recyclable bottles and cans.

A guilty child goes to work for years.

For Chinese-American elderly, language is the biggest obstacle to their integration into American society, and many elderly people have never even left Chinatown all their lives. Because of the tight work rhythm, children have no time to spend with their parents. China old man's heart is very empty and lonely.

According to Guangzhou Daily, Mrs. Zhang in Guangzhou is over 70 years old this year. After she and her husband retired, her son took her to America. There is little entertainment except watching Chinese TV and cleaning every day. The community is quiet during the day. Whenever a car passes by, they will subconsciously look out of the window, especially in the afternoon when their grandchildren come home from school and their children come back from work, and their waiting mood is more urgent. But when they got home, the children were busy again and didn't have much time to really sit down and talk to them. Day after day, the old couple have unspeakable loneliness in their hearts.

For those old people who have lost their wives and gone to the United States alone, life is even more difficult. Mr Zhao Lao from Chinese mainland plans to buy a house with his daughter in Long Island, new york. The scenery here is beautiful, but it is almost isolated from the world. Usually, after my daughter goes to work, Mr. Zhao is the only one left at home. He often tidies up his home twice, feeling that there is nothing to do, so he has to watch the sunrise and sunset.

An elderly parent from Wuhan said that they tried to save money to send their children to study abroad in middle age. Nearly 10 years after their children left, the gray-haired old couple finally set foot on American territory. ? In the United States, 100 days, the total time spent with my daughter probably does not exceed 1 week. ?

Some people live in simple houses, others sleep on the floor.

Many people think that they can live in a garden house in the United States, but for many elderly people in China, dwelling in a humble abode has become a luxury. Many elderly people in China spend 35% of their monthly income on rent, and some people have to pay high utilities and other expenses.

According to an article in Guangzhou Daily, in San Francisco, many old people from China live in scattered small houses in Chinatown, and He Yi, who lives alone, is one of them. In a place called. Taiping hotel? In his apartment, the reporter visited He Yi. Aunt He comes from Guangzhou and has lived in Chinatown for 27 years. She used to work in a restaurant, and her good skills won many repeat customers for her boss. But since 10 years ago, when she was laid off at home due to work injury, He Yi moved to a scattered house here. Today, her monthly income comes from disability allowance, about 800 dollars, but the rent accounts for more than 600 dollars. The bedside is full of pots and pans and oil, salt, sauce and vinegar, and there is not much space in the room.

Mr. Sun, 65, is also worried about his residence. He used to have a big and nice house in Fujian, and his son took him to live in new york a year ago. Because the living environment at home is narrow and crowded, I can only sleep on the living room floor every day. It's not that children are unfilial, but that their income is limited at present, so a family of three generations only rented a house with two rooms and one living room.

Lao Xu, an old man in his early 60s in Northeast China, seems to be more successful. Many years ago, he bought a one-bedroom house at a price of $654.38 million, but he had to pay nearly $900 in local tax every month, and the rent of a house with the same area was only 1 000. In order to meet all kinds of expenses, Lao Xu has to work more than 10 hours every day.

debate

Yale, the parents of foreign students, is really helpless to grow vegetables.

Last year, American media reported positively that many parents of foreign students from China in Yale University were cultivating land and growing vegetables in the school, which was supported by the school and praised by American netizens. Interestingly, many netizens in China reacted strongly, which caused a heated discussion in China. ? Growing vegetables is a racial talent of China people? This statement is widely circulated, but these rumors ignore many real situations behind the incident.

According to Yale Alumni magazine, the parents of international students who come to the United States are between 50 and 70 years old, and no one can speak English, so they can only rely on the help of those who arrive early. Farnham Memorial Park near vegetable fields has now become a gathering place for parents in China. What do they call this place? Three trees? Meet here every day, exercise and communicate with each other in Chinese. According to this report in Yale Alumni Magazine, China's parents' main activities are limited to educating the third generation, communicating with each other and rarely contacting Americans.

Three trees are obviously of great significance to the old people in China here. Old people from different places with different accents and dialects gather here in twos and threes to bask in the sun and talk about their new things. Some old people came to America for the first time. It's only been a few weeks. Many people have been here more than once, up to eight times. Some old people came to Yale from Austin, Troy, new york and other places with the changes of their children's jobs. The old people who have experienced these experiences not only compare the differences between China and the United States, but also have a good understanding of life in different parts of the United States.

These old people are the parents of overseas students in China. They came across the ocean to this relatively strange land in the United States because of their children. Their average age is between 60 and 70. Many of them have recently been promoted to grandparents and come to the United States in batches, not only for their children to study in the United States, but also for their children. In addition to realizing the six-month three-generation reunion trip brought by the tourist visa, it also played a helping role.

The North American Student Daily reported that Aunt Xue's daughter had been in the United States for three years. The old couple were worried about each other when they were in Shenyang because of their late childbearing and being the only child, and they had to make a long phone call almost every day to rest assured. Therefore, although there was no grandson to take care of them, the couple went to America one after another. Aunt Xue thinks that living together in America can at least reassure each other.

This is their third visit to America. The previous two times were half a year. This time, the visa for half a year was extended to one year. Because my daughter is pregnant, the expected date of delivery is in May this year. Aunt Xue plans to help bring her grandson back to China for a few months after her daughter gives birth. Aunt Xue's daughter is very busy at work. She comes home from work at seven or eight every night, but? Is it easier than at home? Aunt Xue said that before going to the United States, her daughter worked as an obstetrician in a famous hospital in Shenyang. See more than 300 patients every day. ? But now we are more flexible and free in the schedule of the laboratory.

phenomenon

Old people in China who are unaccustomed to life have a high suicide rate.

Under the heavy pressure, the suicide rate of the silent elderly in China remains high. Guangzhou Daily reporter learned in an interview in San Francisco that in February 20 12, an old man from China committed suicide after visiting relatives in the United States for one month. It is said that the old man told his family before the incident? Not used to living in America? .

Zhu Benliang, an associate professor at Palo Alto University in the United States, pointed out in a survey last year that due to the special cultural background and the cultural and language challenges faced in foreign countries, the elderly in China are prone to depression and depression, which leads to suicidal thoughts, and the actual suicide rate is higher than that of other ethnic groups. Among them, 100 elderly people in China have 15 suicidal thoughts at all times.

As for the causes of suicide, if the elderly in China are sickly and can only speak one mother tongue, they are particularly prone to loneliness and suicidal thoughts.

Zhu Benliang pointed out that alienation from family has gradually become the main reason for the increase in suicide rate. Home is a place with children. We don't care about simple food, we just want to spend more time with our children? . However, many parents in China said that even such a low requirement is a luxury in the United States.

The survey pointed out that Chinese elderly people often bury themselves in their hearts when facing pressure and lack the ability to deal with problems, which leads to more serious depressive symptoms. Due to the indifference of his family, the old man lost his self-esteem and always wanted to be a burden to his family, so he had the idea of getting rid of it.

visual angle

Can the United States belong to the elderly in China? Heaven?

Many people say that America is a paradise for children, but it can also be a paradise for the elderly.

"Chinese Life Network" reported that in the past, there were few elderly immigrants from China in the United States, and the elderly did not know English, so it was difficult to move in the United States. Now, with the increasing number of immigrants from China, this situation has changed. In addition, the good welfare provided by the United States to these elderly people has made many elderly people in China feel deeply? Like living in heaven? .

According to the report, Grandma Liu has been in the United States for 10 years. At first, she just came to America to help her daughter take care of the children. I didn't expect that she really stayed, and it was the American government's pension.

Grandma Liu now lives in an elderly apartment in central New Jersey. The one-bedroom and one-bedroom house is spacious and bright, and it is entirely funded by the government. Electricity can also be subsidized by applying, and there are about 200 food stamps every month.

? I am not a citizen yet. If I am a citizen, I still have a living allowance of $700 to $800 a month. ? Grandma Liu said.

Not only that, more than 65% of the elderly have cars to the elderly activity center every day, and breakfast and lunch are free. If they need to see a doctor, the elderly center will call a taxi and take them to the hospital for free.

Old people like grandma Liu who immigrated to the United States because of their children found themselves unexpectedly lucky. Because children in the United States have no obligation to support their parents, these elderly people in China who have obtained green cards or become citizens in the United States have no income in the United States and begin to enjoy the welfare of the destitute elderly.

In the United States, people over the age of 65 can apply for apartments for the elderly and live in them for free without income. If you apply for electricity, you can get subsidies. Each state has different regulations on the medical care that the elderly need most. Five years after getting a green card in New Jersey, there will be state health insurance, while new york can get health insurance as long as it gets a green card. This kind of medical insurance for low-income or no-income people is called Medicaid, and you can enjoy all medical services without paying any fees.

Mr. Zhang, from Northeast China, had two heart bypass operations in a hospital in new york. Although his daughter lives well, he still lives with her at present. However, Mr. Zhang used Medicaid for surgery at no cost, and the service he got was no worse than paying medical insurance.

It makes sense for Mr. Zhang to be so confident, because it is difficult to take care of himself in the future. Nursing staff will come home to take care of them for 3-5 hours every day, and the nursing staff expenses will be paid by the government. And if you can't take care of yourself at all, you need to stay in a nursing home for a long time. In the United States, where medical expenses are extremely expensive, having Medicaid means that you can stay in a nursing home for free and enjoy medical care for 24 hours and 7 days. No wonder Mr. Li, who has lived with Grandma Liu for many years in the United States, said that he only heard that the United States is a paradise for children, a battlefield for the middle class and a hell for the elderly. It's not true at all. This is a paradise for the elderly. ?