What are the differences and connections between contacts and friends?

As the saying goes: "A fence has three piles, a hero has three gangs; I still rely on my parents at home, and I still rely on my friends when I go out. " It's true. After all, one more friend is one more way. When you are in trouble, I will lend a helping hand, and when I am down and out, you will also help me. Everyone supports each other, not to mention sharing weal and woe. At least we have each other's care and help. Some people say that it is too utilitarian for friends to use each other, but it is not completely unreasonable. No matter at work or in life, who hasn't "used" our friends, and who dares to say that we haven't been "used" by friends? "Use" used to sound boring, but in fact, being used is also a good thing. At least you can prove that you are valuable and have resources to exchange. Making friends is like falling in love. Unequal communication is difficult to maintain for a long time. It is inevitable that there will be bad feelings when you pay blindly, and gradually you will become old friends you will never see again, let alone help each other in the future.

After class, I received a phone call from a high school classmate I hadn't contacted for a long time. I played well at that time. Through the space, he knew that I was running my own official personal WeChat account and reading was ok, so he wanted to promote his cosmetics through my platform. Hearing this request, my heart is quite contradictory. First, I haven't contacted you for a long time. I just asked me to help promote it, and I didn't even have a simple greeting. Secondly, products such as cosmetics are too risky. He is just a small agent, that is, WeChat business. The quality of cosmetics could not be guaranteed, so he politely refused his request. He was a little unhappy and replied, then you must know many people who write articles. See who can send such an advertisement and contact me. It was a little awkward when I first refused. I listened to his words, hung up the phone and asked everyone in the writing group who could receive such an advertisement. After asking around, few friends are willing to bring it. Finally, one person was willing to take the order, but the price was much higher than the usual copy. Call back according to the phone that my friend just called and tell him that someone is willing to send it. He was very happy to tell me a lot of product introductions, then asked my micro-signal to send me the details, and finally said thank you very politely. Just after adding his WeChat, he was screened by more than a dozen promotional pictures. After he introduced me, I told him the other party's offer. He immediately replied with a puzzled expression and asked in surprise, "More money?" Aren't all friends? Don't you know that man too? Talk to him and do me a favor. "I didn't get angry when I saw such a reply, but I was amused by his remarks. What do you mean, do me a favor? Others have worked hard to help you write a copy, typeset and publicize it, and you sent it away with a thank you? In your eyes, other people's labor is so cheap. I am your friend, but I am not a squeezing machine for your contacts. It's ok to help each other, but leave me alone before it's too late.

What is the Internet? In the dictionary, personal connections are interpreted as "interpersonal context formed through interpersonal relationships", which is often used in political or commercial fields, but in fact, no matter what industry you do, everyone will use personal connections.

Generally speaking, connections are not how many people you know, nor how many people know you, but how many people recognize you and are willing to help you. Cognition and recognition are two completely different concepts. The former is just a chance meeting, and I have a little impression. The latter is the reason why others really remember you. Many college students' most typical misunderstanding of personal connections is that the more people they know, the wider their personal connections will be. Many friends always think that people with social relationships must be the best. Some friends even think that the more friends on WeChat, the wider the network will be. Actually, it's not. In addition to simple quantitative comparison, network quality determines everything. In Ode to Joy, Fan's father is ill in hospital, but she can't find anyone who is willing to help her. Those fair-weather friends at the dinner table can't be called contacts at all. No one wants to help you when you really need help. Networking is different from friends. Friends may share joys and sorrows, but networking is often just the icing on the cake. They can only share joys and sorrows, not * * *.

The second misunderstanding about networking is that networking is just to get others to help you. Just like a friend who called me to advertise, he contacted me just to meet his own needs. Real connection is based on value equivalence, and peer-to-peer value exchange is the basis of connection and resource stability. Relationships depend on entities, and skins do not exist. How to paste your hair? You can continue to provide high-quality resources to others, and others will be willing to establish deep links with you and provide equivalent value returns. One of the simplest equivalence is the connection between resources and money. Without utility, this is reality. If society can have more such "reality", the transaction with less human feelings will be more benign. Why are there many opportunities and good employment environment in big cities? Big cities are not like small cities, because they are "real" and because the rules are transparent, they are more dynamic.

Although contact is different from friends, it is difficult to maintain contact that has not been maintained for a long time. It's hard to ask others for help again. The real popularity is not how many people you have dealt with, but how many people are willing to take the initiative to deal with you! Just thinking that people don't call contacts, that's just your address book. Real contacts are a valuable resource, which needs your careful maintenance. Losing contact with the people closest to you will gradually alienate you. Take jim randel's advice and spend 3-6 hours a week maintaining your contacts. Of course, if you really want to maintain your contacts and improve the level of your circle of friends, you need to constantly improve yourself and maintain your core competitiveness. Only if your own resources and values can be at the same level as others, can you really maintain your contacts? Your circle is different. What can you integrate?

I am not advocating a utilitarian society, but I just hope that everyone can see the reality clearly. Of course, when you associate with people, especially with excellent people, your attitude towards people is an important reference standard for others to judge you. Tagore once said that false sincerity is more terrible than magic. Treat people sincerely, never be smart, and don't think that others are fools and can be at your mercy. Make friends and water the flowers and roots. Sincere people walk into their hearts; False people fade out of sight as soon as they leave; A hypocritical person has known each other all his life, but it is difficult to talk to each other at first; And sincere people, once they get to know each other, are like old friends returning.

If the encounter between people is fate, then people get along with each other sincerely. When you are strong enough, you are a magnetic field. If you are in full bloom, butterflies will come. If you are sincere, people will come.

An attitude towards time is an attitude towards life? Wechat official account? Brewing wine with time ID:yongshijianniangjiu