Understanding and Reflection on Multiculturalism

After class on Thursday night, I couldn't calm down for a long time, and I have been reflecting on the embodiment and influence of multicultural background in my present family.

Now there is a big age gap between my husband and me. If there is a generation gap of three years as the saying goes, there has been a generation gap of four years between us. However, in the process of getting along with us, my husband never seems to weaken my strength and knowledge because he is older than me. Many times we like to share our views and opinions with each other. This reminds me that when we talk about life and get along, we can always hear each other's sharing, instead of being looked down upon because I am young and inexperienced. Just last week, we listened to classical music together. When we can talk about our own understanding of music, I can hear my husband's professional sharing. The chords of piano and cello match like a duet. He can also listen to me patiently about the bow and skill of cello. This is also a multicultural education. My husband is a music major, but as an amateur who has only studied violin, he can still listen to my advice carefully. Think about it, this is not his respect for me!

In terms of "gender", I am influenced by my parents, and girls should be like girls. Be gentle and generous. It's what a wife should do to keep a good house, be diligent and virtuous, and be considerate of her husband. As for my husband, who is the head of the family, I also copied the model of "Native House", hoping that my husband can hold up a sky for me. He is the pillar of his family, and his family is here. It seems that my husband is also influenced by tradition in family division of labor. He also thinks that men are the masters outside and women are the masters inside. Although I said I was the head of the family, he always rushed in front to shelter me from the wind and rain when things happened. Now that I think about it, I feel that my husband's Chen Dan and her husband's protection are not taken for granted. When he is tired, when he needs support, maybe we can swap roles. Home is the same to both of us. Whether it is the division of labor or the expectations of the other party, we may need more flexibility. It depends on the situation, the change of the times and the change of people. We might as well try, what kind of division of labor and interaction is more suitable for our family, more suitable for him and me.

Along the way, look at my husband and I, both from other places to this city. We have lost our local accent. We usually speak Mandarin. Only by talking to your family can you regain your childhood language. We are all "immigrants", living together in such a city and having no relatives. Only I rely on him, and he snuggles up to me. Although we can't see each other, none of us can help liking each other. Chopsticks fell to the ground, and we could both grope on the ground. We don't have to worry about being laughed at by anyone. We cook directly, and we don't have to be afraid of being called pathetic. That's how we live. It seems that they always encourage each other when there are difficulties. When there are troubles, they always try to solve them.

Writing here, I suddenly made a new discovery. The accents of my husband and I, urban and rural areas, immigration, class and race, seem to represent our past. Because we came to such a strange place together, it became a past tense. But there is not much difference between education and health, including income and occupation, which makes our values very similar. The differences in age, gender and generation are gradually respected in the process of mutual consultation and permission. Reflecting on what is often mentioned in online articles, finding a suitable marriage and combining the three views seems to be narrowing the differences of multicultural backgrounds. For couples, living together every day, the influence of multicultural background is really too great.

Looking back on the previous marriage, the regional differences, accents and different expectations of gender roles brought by immigrants made both sides unable to be respected. This is also because of the influence of family background. My mother is a bit arrogant. Growing up in a superior environment, she looked down on people from the countryside. The sense of superiority in career and income also made me feel bad about my husband's family. The division of labor and commitment of parents in the family always reminds me that I can't accept my disappointment with my ex-husband. A detailed analysis of all this is closely related to the multicultural background of the family.

Now think about my background. When I was a child, my father was the pillar of the family and bore most of the expenses of the family. Although my mother is working, my brother and I are mostly worried about study and life. Dad is very busy at work, but he always cooks good food for us when he is free. At this time, my mother felt extremely happy and became my pride. My parents come from a similar family class, have received a normal education and have a decent job. There is little difference in health, income and generation factors. Their marriage and my present marriage have saved us a lot of detours in the multicultural background. At this time, I understand the importance of "door to door" and "three views in one". Writing here, I want to thank the multicultural background in our marriage, which makes it easier for my husband and I to cross so many differences without having to work so hard.

Mentioning these multicultural elements reminds me that I can see family resources from these aspects in my future work. Do they have these differences? If so, where are their efforts? What is experience? If they take fewer detours like me, how can they know that it will make their lives easier, how will these experiences affect their next generation and how will they help their children?