Tong prose has no sleep tonight

"Sleepless Tonight" is an old song. This old song has been circulating frequently in the circle of friends in the past two days. It is accompanied by a video, which is a clip from the American movie "You'll Never Get Rich" and a dance between Fred Astaire and Rita Hayworth. Let’s not talk about this movie for now. I’ll just talk about this song. I like it very much. Unfortunately, I don’t have a sweet voice to sing it myself. "Sleepless Tonight" was written by Meng Weidong for Zhou Bingqian in 1999 as a tribute song for the 50th anniversary of the National Day. The next year at the 2000 Spring Festival Gala, this song was sung again as the closing song.

From 1999 to 2000, that was the time that changed the trajectory of my life. Listening to the beautiful melody of this song, my thoughts drifted out of the sky, and I was instantly pulled far back, back to that long-ago era.

In the autumn of 1999, Lao Xiao, who was still very young at the time, and I took our 3-year-old son and my father to travel to Thailand, Hong Kong and Macau. In Hong Kong, we stopped for an extra day because Lao Xiao and I had to go to the Canadian Consulate in Hong Kong for an immigration interview. The night before the interview, I had no sleep all night. I sat in front of the large floor-to-ceiling window of the hotel and looked out at the Victoria Bay. There were boats moored in the bay, and the lights looked like stars falling from the sky. The waves on the water rose and fell. The night scene was really beautiful. So beautiful. But I had no intention of appreciating it. I was always thinking about the interview. I have studied English for so many years, but when I really need to speak English like this, I feel uneasy. Maybe meeting the immigration officer is too serious, so I can't help but feel nervous. Lao Xiao comforted me: You are not the main applicant, and the immigration officer will not ask you any questions. You just need to keep smiling and stand by my side, and I will take care of everything. The light of the morning light is getting brighter little by little, the veil of the night is quietly fading away, and the sea surface and the sailboat are gradually becoming clearer. Lao Xiao and I put on the formal clothes prepared for the interview and set off. Things in the world are often unexpected, and they do not change according to people's wishes. The interviewer didn't speak English, but French! The entire interview was conducted in French, and I really kept smiling and accompanying him as Lao Xiao said. At the end of the interview, the interviewer politely asked me a question in English with a strong French accent.

Our family of three left Nanjing in the summer of 2000. The night before I left, I couldn't sleep. I was a little touched. Many of my friends also applied for immigration, but only Lao Xiao and I made it to the end, ready to take off. I was still a little hesitant. It was a completely unfamiliar place, but our family was going to live there. There, we have no relatives, no friends, not even a familiar person. How to settle down in Canada has become our immediate problem. I'm still a little excited because I'm about to step into the world of British and American culture, which is the world I've seen in novels and movies. At that time, I never would have imagined that after living in Canada for many years, I would be so eager to return to my hometown. I would miss everything about Nanjing (nowadays, it is an extremely difficult goal for me to return to Nanjing to live). That night, my mother also had a sleepless night. She cried almost all night. Her low hoarse sobs were full of sorrow, making me feel that I was not going to live in Canada, but heading to the execution ground. She cried as if she would lose my daughter forever. While comforting my mother, I promised her: After settling down, I will definitely return to Nanjing often.

? In the late spring of 2006, I returned to Ningxia to visit relatives. On the first night in Nanjing, my old father and mother talked to me all night. The words came out of my head all at once. Until the faint light of early morning shines into the living room through the glass window. I have jet lag, so it's normal for me not to feel sleepy, but my mother also said that she didn't feel sleepy at all. My father said that he just wanted to go to the morning market and buy me some delicious dishes, which are Nanjing specialties.

Tonight, I listened to the song "Sleepless Tonight" and thought back to my years in Canada. "Sighing at the traces of the past years, what trouble has it taken to hide them?" I didn't keep my promise to go home often, but I went back every few years. Every time I go back to Nanjing, I make my elderly parents happy and excited for a long time, especially my mother, who counts my return date and my itinerary day by day. This always stirs up those unspeakable sorrows in my heart. Now, they are both old and their mother is constantly sick. "Returning to Nanjing often" became a topic on Lao Xiao and I's lips, and every discussion ended in vain.

Zhou Bingqian sang in the song: Tonight there is a date with the stars, and beauty lies between dreams. This is so beautiful. I play the song on a loop. The singer's unique voice makes me never tire of listening to it.

Tonight, the night is like water, the stars are twinkling, and half of the moon hangs in the sky. Under such a quiet and stable night, it seems that there is no sorrow in the world. But tonight, I won't sleepless, even though I still have some unanswered questions.

? Life is like a bunch of grapes with one problem after another. Life is still walking through problems, working hard to move forward with a positive attitude. Life is still a glass of sweet wine after eliminating problems.

June 18, 2021

At home in Toronto

~~Thank you for reading~~