Psychology: In interpersonal communication, these three types of people are destined to become less and less popular. Why?

1. People who are not interested in people lack a deep understanding of others

The first fundamental reason for poor popularity is not being interested in people. Psychologist Adler once said that people who are not interested in others will encounter the most difficulties in their lives and do the most harm to others. All human failures stem from such people.

People who are unwilling to interact have two kinds of thoughts. The first is that they think that everyone in the world is cunning and worry about being used or deceived. This kind of people always distrust others, feel that society is complicated and people's hearts are unpredictable, they are not as cunning as others, and are afraid of suffering losses. Second, they are afraid of getting hurt and have many distracting thoughts in their minds, so when interacting with others, they would rather get used to being single than socializing. .

The need for interpersonal relationships comes from your coming and going, which is a kind of emotional blending and interaction. People with poor interpersonal relationships often have relatively closed minds and are afraid of being hurt in interpersonal relationships, so they would rather close their hearts tightly than open their hearts.

On the other hand, they lack understanding of the world of others, so they often cannot have normal emotional flow during communication, which makes them increasingly lonely. There used to be a person in the office who was generally considered to be unpopular because he spoke too stiffly and focused on matters when communicating with others, with almost no flow of emotions, which led others to think that he lacked human touch.

Psychology: Poor Popularity

2. People who do not know how to refuse cannot win the respect of others

Secondly, in interpersonal interactions, people with poor popularity Don't know how to reject others. But this will not lead to higher-level friendship, but will make you disrespected by others.

These people like to dedicate themselves and help others. In their bones, they generally believe that others must get help from me and that I must make sacrifices when interacting with others in order to make others happy.

They respect the law and social ethics more, and do not dare to violate even general social habits. This type of person is a typical person who does not know how to reject others. He has never said "no" to his surroundings or society since he was a child. He will satisfy others with whatever they need.

If we don’t know how to reject others, we often don’t have a clear concept of our true self and others. And when we know how to reject people, it is the best time for us to have a true sense of boundaries.

Interpersonal relationships are based on equality and mutual help. They are neither flattery nor compromise. It is the normal flow of friendship between each other and the exchange of emotions and thoughts.

Psychology: Poor Popularity

3. People who ask for too much will easily lose family ties and friendships

Another type of poor interpersonal relationship is people who ask for too much. Their nature is selfishness. They lack a devotion to friendship. Always thinking about how to get something from others.

But I rarely give. Once you get along with such an overly demanding person for a long time, everyone will automatically stay away from him. Because they are afraid of getting along with him, and they are even more afraid of being asked for and cared about by him.

An overseas student once told me that her two siblings later became incommunicado. It was because of her younger brother's excessive demands that she felt that the family relationship could no longer continue. She and her husband helped her brother immigrate overseas, thinking they could live a peaceful life. Later, the younger brother said that he could not find a job, and then he arranged for his younger brother to work next to his husband.

Maybe because of the relationship, the younger brother lacks respect for his brother-in-law. Not only is he not active in doing things, but his hands and feet are not clean. He often takes money and spends it in the store, and he takes it for granted. Later, my brother-in-law felt that if he continued to do this, the atmosphere in the store would be unhealthy, so he fired him.

But he was used to his sister helping her, and he still kept asking her to give him pocket money. His sister couldn't bear it and finally had to drive him away and let him fend for himself.

People who ask for too much are accustomed to others giving, rarely help others, and take it for granted. Therefore, after being in interpersonal relationships for a long time, they will naturally be jealous of others and have no way to get anything. Support from others.

Reciprocity is the essence of interpersonal relationships. We should neither ask for excessively nor give absolutely in interpersonal relationships. But by establishing a balance between the two, friendship will flow smoothly and feelings will become more and more mellow.

Today’s topic: What do you think are the main characteristics of unpopular people? Welcome to discuss and exchange.