What does contemporary Meng Mu mean?

In ancient times, there were mothers of Mencius who moved three times, and in the contemporary era, there are educational immigrants. Let’s call these parents “contemporary mothers of Mencius.” In order to let their children enjoy better educational resources, I don’t know how many contemporary mothers of Mencius have I sold my house and moved to a school district where a prestigious school is located

The following is a copy:

Not long ago, a fellow countryman passed by the city where I was staying and came to see me for a rest. . She said that she moved to a far away city last year to accompany her daughter to college and to find some work in that city. If I hadn't rushed back to my hometown during the Qingming Festival to visit the tomb this time, I wouldn't have been delayed for so many days. I don't know how my daughter spent these days. He was obviously anxious when he spoke. I said why bother? Aren’t we all adults? She said that her daughter has moved around since she entered middle school. Nowadays, many families are like this, moving all the way from rural areas to county towns and then to big cities. I said it’s good that I’m finally coming out soon, right? She said that her daughter still needs to work after graduating from college. After working, she still needs to start a family. After getting married, she will have children. There is a sense of pride in her words.

This is a mother, this is the current "Mother Meng". It is said that there are quite a lot of Meng's mothers who are constantly moving like this! Somehow, there was a sourness in my heart.

Take your mother to school or even work, which is already a very common phenomenon in reality. I believe that mothers who are migrating should be proud and happy. Because as long as a mother "watches" her children grow up, she is happier than anything else, and it can completely resolve all the pain caused by it. However, I still stubbornly thought, is there really no helplessness and even hardship in adapting and migrating?

I also met a mother who teaches in a key middle school. Her daughter was once the top scorer in the city’s college entrance examination and was admitted to the University of Science and Technology of China. She said that her daughter was very sensible and would call her back every now and then, and her grades were as good as ever. It’s just that my daughter keeps saying, “Today, so-and-so’s mother in the class came to see me.” At first she kept pretending to be confused, but later she couldn't help but tell her daughter, "Mom has to work and can't see you." She also used this as an example to say that she has taught her daughter to be "independent" since she was a child, so that she is not like others. It seems to emphasize his success and pride. But I still saw her sadness. Because in her subsequent speech, she complained a lot about how the teaching profession was so tedious, and she even wanted to take a back seat or simply retire due to illness. Because when she was comforting another mother who was sad about her son's poor grades, she said that in fact, as long as the child feels happy and can see the child grow up happily every day, it is better than anything else. It’s such a small home now. Will it still be considered a home once the children leave? Based on this, I judged that her pride in front of her contained an excessive apology for her daughter. In fact, her heart still moves with her daughter all the time.

Everyone feels that the mother’s accompanying her to study and her mother’s care all the way are due to the hope that her son will become a dragon and her daughter will become a phoenix; or it may be inappropriate doting on her children. In fact, the constant migration of Mencius' mother in contemporary times also contains the element that mothers' emotional life is inseparable from their children. The root of all this is probably the heavy "worry" of contemporary mothers - the uneasiness of leaving their own wings. The mother's "heart" is always so difficult to "place"; she even becomes confused about the concept of "child happiness".

Contemporary Meng’s mother often falls into such a contradictory state of mind and emotion.

Mothers hope that their children will be successful, but success means inevitable travel. The mother is worried when her son (daughter) travels thousands of miles. To be honest, today's children really have nothing to suffer from when they are young. Subjectively, children have been suffering no matter how hard it is since ancient times, and objectively, they are generally getting richer and richer. Who would go out of their way to "find" a hardship for their children? In addition, don’t think that children in rural areas or working or laid-off families are “hard” now. In fact, the children of these families are not "bitter" either. Although they are not very wealthy in material terms, they are indeed very "willing" in their treatment of their children. The spiritual favor he received from his parents and family was no less than that of other families. On the contrary, perhaps the mental pressure faced by children from unusual families is also unusual. In this way, the contrast between material and spiritual things is coupled with the contrast between the physical and psychological growth of children today. In addition, the outside world is really exciting now, full of all kinds of temptations and even traps. Coupled with the loss of social responsibility driven by a few people driven by profit

All of these add up, plus that child is 100% of the whole family after all. In this way, how can our mothers feel at ease? Mencius' mother moved three times in order to provide a better educational environment for Mencius. The migration of contemporary Mencius' mothers is more about worrying about the normal survival and growth of their children, so that their children can be safe, secure and happy.

Mencius mothers who are constantly on the move in the contemporary era, how many of them have started this kind of movement since their middle age, old age, or even at a young age, and have started to live apart from their significant other. , some for almost a lifetime. I'm not sure about the reality of their migration life, but how can such a life be so embarrassing? If it's like Ostrovsky said: When I look back on my life - I don't know how I will face it.

Of course, of course, in addition to the social problems mentioned above, there is also a deep-seated problem of spiritual home. In other words, has our traditional concept of "home" partially aged? Mothers in Western countries also love their children, but their children can fly happily at a very young age.

No matter how far away their children go, they always leave their mothers safe and sound. They carry even a small travel bag with them, pack it up and leave home. Wherever they go, they put down the package and it is home. And we are still emphasizing that moving three times and four places must be "Meng's mother", "good parents follow everywhere", and leaving home must not leave the mother. Should we vigorously advocate Mencius' three migrations, instead of letting Mencius's mothers "follow the army" who were burdened with a heavy burden on their families and displaced from place to place? I always think of an old saying my mother once said: "A woman will not have a home until she is 80 years old." Of course she meant something else. But when I see mothers on the move, I think of this sentence.

If Mencius’ mother stayed with peace of mind and Mencius traveled far and wide, then no matter how far away, the roots would still be deeply rooted, and that “home” would be more vibrant. Although Mencius's mothers were very happy to be constantly moving, they were too tired after all, so they may have lost their true "home". When we love our mother, we should let her have herself and her own home. Only in this way can we have a real and complete mother instead of a nanny, and can we have a home where we are old but not old.