How do parents conduct sex education for their sons [experience sex education with their sons]

Giving sexual enlightenment to children in chaos Six years ago, I immigrated to new york with my son Bin Bin, who just turned nine. My lively son is full of novelty to strange western society, and new york is a city full of sex. Needless to say, the notorious red light district of 42nd Street in Manhattan, which is the adult goods store that my son passes through every day to go to school, is enough to worry me.

One day when my son came home from school, I filled the bathtub with water as usual and prepared to take my son to take a bath. Unexpectedly, he said uncharacteristically, "Mom, I don't want you to help me take a bath anymore!" " "Why?" I asked with a smile. "Because I am a boy, the physiology teacher said that my penis can't be seen by my mother casually!" Oh, my God, son, where did you learn this strange theory? I am angry and funny: "Binbin, you are still young, it is normal for your mother to take a bath for you." I took off my son's shorts while comforting him. I didn't expect him to push me away and shout, "Don't touch me, I have my own privacy!" " Seeing Binbin's serious appearance, I had to give up, but I secretly blamed my child's teacher for making a mountain out of a molehill.

that night, I carefully asked my son what else the teacher said in the physiology class. Binbin's answer surprised me. It turned out that Binbin's teacher showed them nude pictures of men and women, letting the children know that the most obvious difference between men and women's physiological structure lies in genitals. My son stared at me and said generously, "The teacher said that boys' penises and girls' genitals belong to their own privacy, and no one can peek or touch them except doctors."

What I didn't expect was that my son not only knew the physiological knowledge of human development, sexual maturity and women's pregnancy and childbirth, but even before he was ten years old, he was able to talk about the value of life and the importance of friendship between men and women. It seems that Americans' sexual enlightenment education for children also runs through the human education of cherishing life and caring for the opposite sex.

Speak freely, an unforgettable sex education class

Soon after my son entered middle school, his personality changed obviously. Not only has his manners become deeper than before, but he has always paid no attention to his appearance, and he has also begun to seriously clean himself up. Obviously, the adolescent son began to care about his image in the eyes of female classmates.

One day, Bin Bin brought back a notice from the school to parents, saying that there was a sex education class at the school on weekends, including contraception and prevention of sexually transmitted diseases. The notice states that parents must sign the receipt if they don't agree with their children attending classes. In the future, if their children have abortion, AIDS, etc., parents should not accuse the school of poor education. At the end of the notice, parents are welcome to attend sex education classes at school.

At the beginning of class, the beautiful young female teacher wrote a big "SEX" on the blackboard, and then she asked everyone with a smile: "Students, what do you think when you see the word' sex'?"

A boy with curly hair spoke first: "Sex reminds me of nocturnal emission." Someone immediately laughed out loud.

A slightly shy girl whispered, "Sex reminds me of pregnancy." I saw many students snickering.

A black-headed Asian boy suddenly blurted out, "Sex reminds me of making love!" There was a commotion in the classroom at once, and many girls blushed.

At this moment, a strong dark-skinned boy said in a low voice, "Sex reminds me of a naked woman …" As soon as the voice fell, the students burst into laughter. Some students threw pens and notebooks at him, and the classroom seemed to be boiling.

Next, the children continued to speak freely. Their imaginations were so rich. The young female teacher kept writing on the blackboard: "Sex, abortion, kissing, sexy ..." Some words that adults usually find difficult to say were said by the children, without any sense of shyness or filth.

After the classroom became quiet, the female teacher looked at a blackboard full of words, frowned and said, "You said so much, but you missed one thing that is inextricably linked with' sex' ..."

The children speculated in whispers. At this time, the female teacher turned around and wrote "LOVE" on the blackboard without saying a word! The classroom suddenly became silent-"love!" The female teacher's voice is full of emotion: "Love is the holiest and noblest feeling between the two sexes, and sex without love is a body without soul! When people talk about sexiness, they ignore that' sex' is based on' love'. Early pregnancy, abortion, sexually transmitted diseases, etc. in life are often caused by irresponsible sexual behavior ... "

The words of the female teacher are very infectious, and the children who were just smirking have become solemn. Next, the female teacher told the children that sex is natural and wonderful, but it is not good for health and study for middle school students to get involved in sex too early, and it is very painful to have unwanted pregnancy and abortion.

Finally, the female teacher played a disc introducing contraceptive methods, and the children watched it very carefully. The expression of concentration was like watching a mathematical three-dimensional picture.

It turned out that I was worrying about nothing.

In a blink of an eye, Binbin was in the ninth grade. Just when I was worried about whether my son could survive the restless period of youth safely, it suddenly came to the news that public schools provided condoms to high school students free of charge through the proposal of the new york education authorities. Many Chinese parents are very dissatisfied with this. In my opinion, this practice is tantamount to suggesting or encouraging children to steal forbidden fruits.

I rushed to my son's school in a hurry and asked the school to explain the absurd practice of providing condoms. I was received by a psychological counselor in charge of student work. She seems to know China's traditional culture very well, and she speaks in an orderly way: "I have come into contact with many Chinese parents, and you are too strict with your children. Blind sexual imprisonment is foolish and dangerous. " She seemed to see that I was a little surprised, and went on to say, "After children enter adolescence, the hormone secretion in the body surges, the sexual function develops rapidly, and with the role of various external stimuli, their demands for venting sexual excitement and sexual tension will become stronger and stronger, but children do not have the living conditions of adults, and their sexual needs are suppressed, which leads to adolescent sexual anxiety. Who can guarantee that their children will not make deviant things on impulse?" After a pause, she added, "Don't you have an idiom in China that says' nip in the bud'? The school provides condoms to children just to eliminate hidden dangers! Condom itself will not increase students' sexual activities, but it can effectively reduce teenage pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Don't you think so? "

I was deeply moved by the words of the psychological counselor. I have to admit that it seems absurd for the school to provide condoms, but it is actually full of human nature.

One weekend soon, my son and I were watching TV together, and suddenly there were long kissing and sex scenes on the screen. I couldn't help but feel nervous and want to change the channel, but the remote control is in my son's hand. I can't sit still, but I'm sitting still when I look at my son. I don't look at anything else and I'm not embarrassed at all. I thought to myself, "This kid is too mature to watch a sex drama as cool as a cucumber." "Mom, don't stare at me like that. Your son won't dream." Suddenly, my son "cone" me.

since my son started the conversation, I quickly seized the opportunity to ask, "Binbin, do you have a girlfriend?" My son casually replied, "Yes, my relationship with her is not normal!" " My heart can't help but thump. Seeing my nervous appearance, my son glanced at me proudly and joked, "Don't be so nervous, I'm joking with you!" " He got up and turned off the TV, and unexpectedly asked me, "Mom, do you think I have male charm?" Looking at my heroic son, I deliberately smiled without saying a word. My son suddenly made a surprising remark: "I will wait until I go to college to find a smart and sexy female classmate to be my lover." For the sake of her who is destined to appear in my life, I am studying hard now, and I will not touch women to ensure that I will be admitted to a first-class university in the United States two years later! "

I can't help but stare. My son is much more mature than I expected. The son who has experienced sexual enlightenment and adolescent sex education has been able to take "sex" in stride. "Sex" is natural and wonderful in the son's mind. In the western society full of temptations, the son restrained the physiological agitation of adolescence with mature and healthy sexual consciousness. If I ever worried that my son would get lost in new york's "sea of sex", it was purely unfounded.

(Miao Shugao is taken from China Daily)