"One Year in Denmark": There is no perfect happiness, only never-ending footsteps

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Helen Russell, a fashion magazine reporter living in London, lives a busy but unhappy life, and needs to consume a lot of coffee every day to maintain energy. I once had to go to the hospital three times a week to get pregnant, but it was all in vain.

Life is sometimes like a frustrated bird. No matter how high or far it flies, it is always confused and melancholy.

Finally, an opportunity came. Helen’s husband had a chance to work in Denmark - the Lego Company. After all, she was a reporter. After Helen did some research on Denmark, she decided to marry her husband and follow her husband. She supported her husband's suggestion to live in Denmark for a year.

Thus, "A Year in Denmark" kicked off. From January to December, Helen used detailed observation and experience to let readers feel the strange Danish style, astonishing Danish culture and more. Three-dimensional Danish happiness.

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January: There is a Danish word for happiness called hygge (comfortable and comfortable).

The winter in Denmark is very cold. From November to February of the following year, Danes only enjoy hygge at home and rarely go out.

In different countries, this aspect of happiness is quite similar. As Lin Yutang said: Happiness lies in sleeping on your own bed. The second is to eat meals cooked by parents. The third is to listen to your lover's love words to you. The fourth is to play games with children.

Family is always our harbor of happiness. The happiness in the family is also inseparable from a practical and comfortable aesthetic environment.

In Denmark, there is a lighting design master named Paul. Almost 50% of Danish people have at least one lamp designed by Paul in their homes.

They support domestic production and value the design, craftsmanship and quality of items. This is also related to the exposure to high-quality architectural design in school since childhood.

Yes, imagine sleeping soundly in such a well-designed home environment. How could it not be called hygge?

February: Denmark is a happy workplace.

There is a "Jandey's Law" in the Danish workplace. One sentence summary: Don’t be too self-righteous and don’t overestimate your irreplaceability in the company. You are really not that important.

In Denmark, 40% of unemployed people find a job within three months, and 25% change jobs once a year.

Because there are no worries when changing jobs, you can receive 80% to 90% of your original salary within two years after resigning (including voluntarily resigning or being laid off). Even if you are laid off by the company, you will be well protected by the government. The expenses will be borne by the government until you find a job you like.

It’s incredible, there is another kind of survival called relying on the government. In such a country and such a workplace, it is difficult for people to be unhappy.

March: Pursuing personal hobbies and maintaining lifelong learning will help improve your happiness index.

Danes are keen on various interest clubs, and many studies have shown that joining a club itself will make people feel happy. Moreover, a wealth of leisure activities can also help improve the quality of life and work efficiency, thereby making your career more successful.

Many retired people in Denmark take night classes to learn foreign languages, just so that they can easily order a glass of beer and wander around when they go on vacation abroad.

Maintain lifelong learning, broaden your horizons, and happiness will naturally come one after another. As the ancient Greek Solon said: Live until you are old and learn until you are old.

April: Eating meaty dishes can help improve your sense of well-being.

Danish children like to watch animal dissections. For example: snakes, pigs... these bloody scenes that make people think deeply. For Danes, apart from the unpleasant smell, this is more helpful for children to learn knowledge and is more vivid than in the classroom. interesting. They need to understand the cruelty of nature and learn to face life and death.

I don’t know if it’s because they liked to watch animal anatomy since they were young. They only regard animals as animals and like to eat meat dishes. Statistics show that Danish vegetarians only account for 3% to 5% of the total population.

There is a scientific basis for eating meat dishes to make people happy. I feel the same way, how about you?

May: Patriotism makes people happy.

In Denmark, 90% of people think that their motherland is excellent; in the Netherlands, 7%; and in Sweden, only 12%.

The People's Daily once wrote: "Patriotism is always the pillar of the existence of a nation and a country, and it is also the minimum standard of life."

The more patriotic we are, the better our country will be. The stronger the country is, the happier our lives will be.

June: Women in Denmark are happier than women in other countries.

In Denmark, the parental leave for newborn parents is 52 weeks... The parental leave for men is 2 weeks... As long as there are children under the age of 18 in the family, there will be government subsidies... More than 78% of mothers will return to the In the workplace, because the government will subsidize 3/4 of childcare costs... Danish men are more actively involved in childcare life... Save 10,000 words here.

But even so, patriarchal culture is deeply rooted in Denmark.

Women who are married, have children or are pregnant are also discriminated against by companies, even though they have the Equal Treatment Act.

July: Denmark, with its high divorce rate, is the happiest country in the world. This is no joke.

Danes enjoy life very much and they usually go on vacation in July. It is estimated that the vacation time is generally long, and people will find that the two people no longer love each other, or they have discovered a new love after the separation. Therefore, July is the month with the highest divorce rate.

Even if one day you are not satisfied with the person you sleep with, or you fall in love with someone else, whether they are married or the other person is married, they will boldly pursue you without any consideration. No one cares how many times you have been married, because most people are so free.

Data from Statistics Denmark shows that 42.7% of couples will eventually divorce. In addition, the divorce rate among immigrants is also on the rise.

Why is Denmark still the happiest country in the world with such a high divorce rate? The explanation given by a lawyer is: That is because we have equality and freedom.

When it comes to divorce, Danish women can be as free and easy as men. Because a large number of women are active in the workplace, they have a stable income and are not dependent on their husbands. In addition, divorce procedures are easy, and they can also receive three-quarters of the economic subsidy from the government for raising children. Financially, there is not much pressure.

In China, since 2000, the national divorce rate has actually been rising continuously. There is a set of data online: in divorce cases, the proportion of women initiating divorce accounts for 74%. Of course, this is also inseparable from the independent personality and economic income of modern women in the family.

Just this month, our author, Ellen, became pregnant. Let me know in advance the gender of the child, it is a boy.

August: Danish children (and parents secretly enjoying themselves) are very happy.

No one steals children in Denmark. The authors call this “institutional trust.” Just for this alone, I don’t know how many Chinese people are happy.

In Denmark, the government bears 75% of the childcare costs for infants and toddlers, and there are various discounts and exemptions. Just like China, you start entering public schools at the age of 6. Even if you go to a private school, the government will bear 2/3 of the cost. Citizens over the age of 18 are entitled to bursaries during their studies, which are determined based on age, parents' income, etc.

In 2013, a documentary was released in Denmark in which a group of Chinese students competed with Danish students. As a result, the Danish children completely failed academically.

But Karen of Aarhus University said: "We will never be like China, but that is not a big problem... But our young people are creative, which is our biggest advantage. . ”

The future job market is bound to change rapidly. While academics are important, it is also crucial to cultivate children’s ability to accept future challenges.

September: Danish snacks will make you happy.

In Denmark, if you want to become a baker, you need at least three years and seven months of training, so their pastries are world-class. Pizza and Danish hot dogs are also delicacies that can be seen everywhere in Denmark.

For the Danes, fresh is the best. If it is a carrot, they will recommend that you eat it raw. This is the most convenient way to get the greatest pleasure. This is a bit like our Chinese Cantonese cuisine, which advocates the original taste of the ingredients.

October: Danes are big drinkers and the reason they show such high levels of happiness is because they are always drunk.

You may or may not take it seriously, in fact it is a joke. But Danes are really good drinkers, with each person drinking an average of 11 to 12 liters of pure alcohol every year.

When things go to extremes, they must be reversed. The Danish people's pursuit of too much freedom always has an unsatisfactory side.

For example, Denmark is the European country with the highest number of sexually transmitted diseases caused by sexual openness; the proportion of women who die from lung cancer is the highest in the world; there are open drug rooms... So the Danes are not healthy and do not take it seriously. healthy.

This is also closely related to the country’s free medical care. Anyway, no matter what the situation is, the government will take care of and foot the bill.

November: Insufficient sunshine makes it easy to suffer from "winter mood disorders". More sun exposure is beneficial to happiness.

Puppies can develop seasonal affective disorder. This is caused by reduced levels of melatonin and serotonin. The same goes for people. Lack of sunlight can easily lead to “winter mood disorder.” During this month, Denmark only gets less than one and a half hours of sunshine per day. Therefore, sunbathing is very popular in Denmark, and young Danish people are among the most active users of sunbeds in the world.

When I was reading fairy tales as a child, I could always see a plump woman holding a candle in her hand: "Come on, baby..." including many illustrations from fairy tales, and I could always see it. to the shadow of the candle. Yes, the Danes love candles and they consume the most candles in the world each year. And candles are more conducive to making the home environment more hygge.

December: Trust and Danish life can bring you happiness.

December in Denmark is the month when property is assessed, work is suspended and taxes are paid.

In Denmark, a comprehensive welfare system is supported by high tax burdens. It can be regarded as taking from the people and using it for the people. As a Dane, I also enjoy it. After all, studying, going to university, and going to the hospital are almost free...

Happiness economist Christian said: All countries with sound welfare systems are highly trustworthy. society, although the high level of trust in Danish society is not necessarily due to the welfare system. Of course, there are also delicious food, a free and willful culture, and a high degree of security...

Merry Christmas, Helen's son is born. On the road to exploring Danish happiness, they also gained their own little happiness. So they made a decision: live in Denmark for another year...

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Are you happy? , how would you rate yourself? In the book, Helen often asks people this question, and 100% of the answers are: 8 or 9 points. And you? Are you happy? How would you rate yourself?

Very happy (feeling ecstatic): 10 points

Very happy (feeling relaxed and happy): 9 points

Happy (emotionally high, feeling good): 8 points

Moderately happy (feeling pretty good, happy): 7 points

Somewhat happy (a little happier than the average person): 6 points

Average (not special) Happy and not particularly unhappy): 5 points

Somewhat unhappy (a little lower than average): 4 points

Moderately unhappy (depressed): 3 points

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Unhappy (bad mood, lack of energy): 2 points

Very unhappy (depressed, dull): 1 point

Very unhappy (very depressed) , the mood hit rock bottom): 0 points

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Different countries have created different cultures, and different cultures have also created our different feelings of happiness. Even the Danish happiness, which is the best in the world, is not perfect. This is not a shortcoming. This is real happiness. There is no perfection.

Qiao Jia said in the book "Carrying the Clear": "A person's happiness often comes from self-identification and acceptance. The higher a person's self-identity, the higher the degree of acceptance. Then the easier it is for him to have a peaceful mind, the easier it is to be satisfied with reality, and the easier it is for him to feel happy."

I deeply believe that.

Happiness, from identifying yourself to accepting yourself, to loving yourself, is a journey of self-growth. If happiness has national boundaries, one thing must be unified: happiness is in your own hands.

There is a long road ahead, and I hope you and I will eventually gain full happiness, a Chinese-style happiness that belongs to each of us.