What do you think of Xu Zhimo’s attitude towards feelings?

Since that extraordinary death, Xu Zhimo has been a hot spot in the cultural world, enduring

enduring and lasting. Not to mention anything else, his emotional entanglements with several women are a topic that can never be finished. Zhang Youyi, Lin Huiyin, Ling Shuhua, Lu Xiaoman, Han Xiangmei, and so on

These are just Chinese, foreign ones are said to include Pearl Buck and Smedley.

Among the several women, Zhang Youyi and Zhang Youyi have the most honorable status, and they are the first couple. The relationship was the dullest, and they divorced after seven years. There is no conclusive evidence of the relationship between the two except for half of the "Divorce Notice" (the other half has not been found), and Xu Zhimo's boastful letter. Usually people always say that they are not very harmonious after marriage, but they are considerate of each other after divorce. These words were all said by Xu Zhimo's friends. I'm afraid they are unreliable. Even if they are reliable, it's just an appearance. The truth is, whether before or after the divorce, or even more than fifty years after Xu Zhimo's death, Zhang Youyi never said anything.

This is exactly the wisdom of Zhang Youyi, and commentators will say so. It's too outrageous, why don't you think about it? What should she say? It's okay to say Xu Zhimo, but if he divorces you, it's okay to say it's not good. In addition to the abandoned wife, you have to add a jealous wife. Grapes that cannot be eaten are sour. Grapes that are half eaten by oneself and asked to be taken away by others are even more sour.

Decades later, this poor man finally told the truth before his death. She lived to be eighty-eight years old and died in New York in 1988. Her grandniece, Miss Zhang Bangmei, published an English book "Small Feet and Suits - The Family Changes of Zhang Youyi and Xu Zhimo" in the United States in September 1996. (Bound Feeland Western Dress), published by Doubleday Publishing House. The truth about their relationship was finally revealed to the world.

Zhang Bangmei is the granddaughter of Zhang Yujiu, Zhang Youyi’s eighth brother. Her father is a professor at Yale University. She is a third-generation immigrant. She graduated from the East Asian Studies Department of Harvard University, majoring in Chinese literature. Law degree, worked as a lawyer in New York. From 1983 to

before Zhang Youyi's death in 1988, she talked with her aunt for five years, first writing a graduation thesis and then fleshing it out into a biography. "My aunt has read my paper", the authenticity of the content can be trusted.

Would it be wanton slander? Don't worry, the author repeatedly emphasizes that the Zhang family is always proud of Xu Zhimo. Zhang Yujiu told his granddaughter before his death that he "be more loyal to Xu Zhimo" when writing a book. It was this grandfather. In his will, he asked his family to recite several poems by Xu Zhimo at his funeral.

At first, she came to explore the marriage between Xu Zhimo and her aunt with admiration, but the facts

Aroused her doubts and resentment time and time again, and her aunt was disappointed. The humiliation he suffered was due to Xu Zhimo's ruthlessness.

She never expected that from before marriage to after marriage, Xu Zhimo despised Zhang Youyi so much.

When I saw Zhang’s photo for the first time, I turned down the corner of my mouth and said in a disgusting tone: "Country country

Baozi!" After marriage, I never looked at Zhang Youyi. . "Except for fulfilling the most basic marital obligations

, he ignored me. Even when it came to fulfilling his marital obligations, he only followed his parents' wishes to have grandchildren. That's all."

In the winter of 1920, Zhang Youyi went abroad to reunite with her husband. In the past, it was thought that Xu Zhimo missed his wife and wrote the letter begging his father. Now, I understand, this letter was probably written at the request of Zhang Junmai. They had been separated for several years and had an heir. The situation at that time had no reason not to allow Zhang Youyi to go abroad. Xu Zhimo didn't ask her to go, but her husband's family sent her there. The reason why her parents-in-law sent her there was just to remind Xu Zhimo of his responsibilities to the family. There is no explanation more reasonable than Zhang Youyi's.

If he missed his wife so much, he would not greet her like that.

Three weeks later, the ship finally sailed into the dock of Marseille Port. "I was leaning on the poop deck, waiting impatiently to go ashore, and then I saw Xu Zhimo standing in the crowd looking around. At this moment, my heart dropped. He was wearing a slim black fur coat and a white silk scarf around his neck. Although I had never seen him wearing a suit, I knew it was him.

I could see his attitude immediately, and there was no mistaking it, because he was the only one among the people picking up the boat who showed an expression that he didn’t want to be there. ”

On the plane from Paris to London, Zhang Youyi became airsick and vomited. Xu Zhimo turned his head away

and said, "You are such a country bumpkin!" Not long after he finished speaking, he After also vomiting, Zhang Youyi

not to be outdone, blurted out softly: "I think you are also a country bumpkin.

”

When I was living in London, Shaxton, and later in Berlin, I used to always talk about Xu Zhimo

How kind and righteous Xu Zhimo was. Now I know how Xu Zhimo is. The treatment of Zhang Youyi was very unfriendly and inhumane.

The two settled in Shaxton. Soon Zhang Youyi became pregnant. At this time, Xu Zhimo was chasing Lin. Huiyin, who had no time to care, said as soon as he heard it: "Abort the child. "

In those days, abortion was dangerous, Zhang said: "I heard that someone died because of abortion. "

Xu Lengbing said: "There are still people who died because of taking the train. Have you seen people

not taking the train? ”

Not long after that, Xu Zhimo brought a Chinese female student to his home for dinner. He called her Miss Ming in the book. Zhang Youyi discovered that this lady wearing a woolen navy skirt, She actually had her feet bound.

After seeing off the guests, Xu asked Zhang what he thought of Miss Ming. Zhang said: "She looks very good, but she has small feet. Doesn't match the suit. "Xu Zhimo, who was walking around, turned his heels, as if Zhang Youyi's comments vented his irritability and frustration, and suddenly screamed

: “I knew it, that’s why I wanted a divorce. ”

The title of the book comes from this. Zhang Youyi is a natural, and Xu Zhimo rarely wears suits later. This is just a symbol, symbolizing the conflict between two cultures. China and the West, tradition and modernity

Xu wanted to divorce immediately, but when Zhang refused, he walked away, leaving Zhang alone in Shaxton.

The delivery date was approaching. In desperation, Zhang wrote to his second brother Zhang Junmai asking for help and came to Paris and later to Berlin to give birth to the child. Xu knew Zhang's whereabouts but ignored him. During the divorce procedures, she found Berlin.

After giving birth, Zhang Youyi quickly recovered from her grief and entered the Pestalozzi Academy to specialize.

Early childhood education. After returning to China, he founded Yunshang Company and took charge of the Shanghai Women's Savings Bank, both of which were very successful.

Finally, he emerged from the shadow of Little Foot and became an eye-catching new man in a suit. Female

What is even more commendable is that after returning to China, she still served Xu Zhimo's parents (recognized as her foster daughter) and carefully raised her and Xu Zhimo's son in Taiwan. The "Complete Works of Xu Zhimo" was also compiled under her initiative, in order to let future generations know about Xu Zhimo's works.

This is how Xu Zhimo treats Zhang Youyi. What about Zhang Youyi’s feelings for Xu Zhimo?

It’s better to listen to Zhang Youyi’s self-report--

You always ask me, I Love Xu Zhimo or not. You know, I can't answer this question.

I am confused about this question because everyone always tells me that I have done so much for Xu Zhimo.

Yes, I must love him. However, I can't say what love is. I have never said "I love you" to anyone in my life.

If you take care of Xu Zhimo and. If his family is called love, then I

probably love him. Among the few women he has met in his life, maybe I love him the most.

No, maybe. It can be said with certainty that Zhang Youyi loves Xu Zhimo the most, because her love for Xu Zhimo has no strings attached, and it doesn't even matter whether Xu Zhimo loves her or not.