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4 tricks to teach you to cure avoidant personality.
What makes us escape is the unknown; What scares us is running away.
Is there anyone around you:
During the exam week, I saw that the book was too thick and difficult, and the preparation time was too short and too urgent. I simply gave up on myself: "I won't review, and I will pretend that the naked exam never happened."
When community activities are going on, it is necessary to contact all parties and deal with all kinds of chores. "It's too much trouble to do these things, so I won't do it."
During the recruitment season, all the brothers and sisters said that you have to dress up, make up and pack yourself to find a good job. "Looking for a job is too much trouble. I will look for it later. "
Graduation season, graduates have to find a house and start living independently. "Moving to find a house seems very hard and troublesome. Never mind, it's annoying! "
At work, the superior assigned a new task, which was required to be completed on time and with good quality within three days. "This is impossible. Can I stop doing it? "
Avoiding procrastination when encountering slightly unfamiliar difficulties is diagnosed as escape personality syndrome.
Avoidant personality, also known as avoidant personality, is characterized by behavioral withdrawal, psychological inferiority, avoidance or inability to cope with challenges. (Excerpted from Baidu Encyclopedia)
In fact, the first reaction of most people when they encounter strange things is to escape. But the cost of escape is too high.
Solving difficulties is very painful. Escape can temporarily relieve stress, but it will lead to more serious consequences.
Because I didn't review, my grades failed, and finally I had to take the time to review the make-up exam.
I lost my friend because I evaded the responsibility of the activity and left a bad review for my companions.
Because of the delay in finding a job, I missed the golden period of recruitment, and there were no more good job opportunities.
Because I didn't find a house in time, I missed the opportunity to choose a house with high cost performance.
I missed the opportunity of promotion and salary increase because I didn't complete the new task assigned by my superiors.
I wish I had bitten my teeth.
Difficulties are like snowballs. At first, they were just small balls that could be melted with the palm of your hand. If it is not solved immediately and allowed to continue to develop, it will eventually become a big problem that is difficult to solve.
Avoidant personality is often afraid at the sight of a small snowball, allowing it to roll into the future and become a big snowball that can't breathe.
This is a disease that must be treated.
It's hard to jump out of the comfort zone, but after gritting your teeth and facing the difficulties, you will find that, dear, those things are really not as difficult as you think.
The unknown will amplify our fears.
In Run, Brother, there is a game to test courage. Members need to grab marbles from the black box as soon as possible. The camera box is just ordinary items such as water polo, kelp, wig, etc., but under unknown circumstances, all the fears are magnified, making every pair of hands reaching into the camera box tremble and their throats scream unconsciously.
The way to overcome fear is very simple, that is, catch the things in the black box in the bright place, and once you see the details clearly, the fear will naturally be eliminated.
Difficulties in life are like unknown objects in a black box. The unknown makes us afraid, and fear makes us escape. So as long as you bravely take off the mask of life, you will know that the difficulty is not that difficult.
It is not easy to reach out to the unknown difficulties and bravely take off the mask of life, but it is not difficult. The following four suggestions will teach you how to cure your avoidant personality.
We always seem to be forced to face the difficulties in life-exams, job hunting, work and marriage.
Let's consider this problem from another angle.
Take the initiative to meet the difficulties, and the difficulties will not be difficult.
Thanks to the university version of the growing heart-to-heart activity, this method comes from the sharing of tutors.
We will always be good teachers, and it is always easier to solve other people's difficulties than to solve our own.
When we write down all the difficulties, it is to sort out the messy psychology, sort out the difficulties and clear our minds, and it will become much easier to solve problems.
For example, as a graduate dog, renting a house is an important issue when he is going to work in a foreign land.
So I wrote: I want to solve the rental problem.
Then treat a solution as someone else's problem. Rent, that is, don't set a lot first, don't be too far from the company, the house price is reasonable, public security and so on. Once the rental standard is determined, it will be much easier to find a house according to the established standard.
It seems a little difficult for a person to solve all the difficulties. The world is so big, there are always people who encounter or are experiencing the same problem. So it's also a good way to find a solution with your partner.
If you don't want to review alone, find someone to go to the library to supervise each other. If you don't want to find a job alone, just follow the classmates who are looking for a job, and maybe you can gain valuable experience.
This is the hardest thing to do.
In the face of difficulties, the more you think about it, the harder it is. Just like running, the body will be very tired. If you keep shouting tired, you will crush yourself mentally. At this time, my head is empty, my steps are automatic, and I will get through it.
In the face of difficulties, don't think about how difficult it is, let alone keep shouting about it, just concentrate on solving the problem.
I hope that one day, when you look back at the things that once scared you, you can simply say, "That's all."
Thanks for reading!
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