What words would you use to describe the coming 217?

? 1. "greasy" middle age?

Last weekend, I was invited to a gathering of children. I rang the doorbell, and the door was opened to me by an enthusiastic middle-aged woman, round and full, with a shiny face, a thin braid hanging from the high bun line, and her abdomen bulging slightly.

I was curious to observe that someone might be pregnant for more than three months. When I entered the door, I suddenly heard the familiar name "Ding-dong" from the hostess (she was my colleague ten years ago), and I couldn't help but ask in surprise that it was the "Ding-dong" who just opened the door for me.

At that time, the hostess got married, and this girl named Ding Dong was her maid of honor. She was 24 or 25 years old, with a slim and hot figure, especially smart and cheerful eyes, and a tall ponytail. I remember that we once sat around and played the Three Kingdoms Kill.

I walked into the hall and was introduced by the hostess. This is Ding Dong's husband, the best man at her wedding, because I was particularly impressed. The best man played games with me at the scene!

It's really hard to imagine. Today, he, the handsome young man with hair wax and a hairy head that I remember, has become a unique symbol of middle-aged men. His hair is long, his back is bare, and his forehead is more prominent. It's empty and wide, just like a river crossed by years.

You have to admit that the "greasy" of the years is vividly engraved on your face and figure. I haven't seen you for ten years, alive and like a dream.

at that moment, I wondered if I was also a symbol of a middle-aged woman in their eyes. Alas, youth ran away with people like this.

Later, after a detailed chat, I learned that he had been doing e-commerce for years, and after several years in Shenyang, he didn't make any money, and he returned to Qingdao. He opened several small stores online in JD.COM, working overtime and staying up late, with heavy work pressure, irregular work and rest, and his hair fell off badly. He bought a house and a car with a loan, and he planned to have a second child. After chatting, he couldn't help asking me: Is he suitable to do it?

Adult's life is indeed the same everywhere: successful people have succeeded, while unsuccessful people laugh at themselves and worry at the same time, but I don't know that such self-comfort is greasy.

greasy, in the final analysis, it's still stressful, and it's just a middle-aged crisis that we are experiencing or about to experience.

2. Soul coordinates

First of all, I think the most important thing is to let go of the "sunk cost" and don't let it lock you up. What is sunk cost?

the original meaning refers to the cost that cannot be changed by any decision now or in the future because the past decision has already taken place. When people decide whether to do something, they not only look at whether it is good for them, but also look at whether they have invested in it in the past.

we call these irrecoverable expenses, such as time, money and energy, "Sunk Cost".

For a popular example, I waited for the bus for half an hour and still didn't come, but I didn't want to call a taxi, not stingy, but unwilling. What if I waited for another five minutes and the bus would come? So, continue to wait, but will wait for several 5 minutes.

the sunk cost always has a magic power that people can't forget, and you will be annoyed by it, or you will cling to it and get deeper and deeper. ?

Before, an accountant added me. One day, he left me a message saying that he had been paying attention to the No.1 workplace network for more than three years. I also read your articles. I especially agree with the concept of career planning. I also thought about changing careers and thought it was necessary to make a career plan.

But the accounting profession that I have worked for seven years will be abandoned in this way. I'm a little unwilling. I don't know what percentage of my income will be after I change careers. Now, the more I do it, the more terrible I am, and the more afraid I am to act. Not only do I see all kinds of shady scenes in the company circle that make me desperate, but my future life also makes me breathless. I have to support a family of four with a mortgage on my back, and take care of the elderly on both sides ... < P > I know all the reasons, but I still can't get rid of this black hole when I switch to life.

this reminds me that some time ago, ZTE R&D personnel with bright resumes from 985 universities all the way jumped from the enviable pyramid to life and death at the moment when they were dissuaded by the enterprise, and they stayed at the age of 42 forever. ?

I'm not afraid of death, but I'm afraid of living. Happiness is as fragile as thin ice, leaving only white-haired parents and starving children, speechless desolation.

Every industry has its ups and downs, and no workplace will be eternal, declining and blocked. Can we make every effort to change our course in the first half of hitting the rocks? How do you know if it works or not if you don't try? I have to say that we think too much and do too little.

Therefore, people always tend to worry about the immediate things, even if they pawn the future resources, they have to save the immediate ones. Even if it is broken or meaningless to you. ?

It's time to let go. You must get out of sight, cut the gordian knot and discard it decisively! Don't question and don't hesitate!

a lifetime is so long, and how many people can live so clearly and transparently? Just stop the loss in time and not be trapped in an endless black hole by "waste"! Without a trace of fetters and constraints, you can take a chance and make bold progress, and you will have an opportunity. Only when you have the opportunity will you arouse new life, and you will be able to shine.

second, change lanes ahead of time and make a career plan for yourself, no matter what age you are at now.

If an industry is prosperous, even if you are treated unfairly in one place, you can find another place to work when you go out. It is precisely because an industry is dying that you want to stay in the company even if you beg, because you know that there is nowhere else to go when you go out, and you will be desperate until you are old and young.

Take the real estate circle as an example. At that time from 24 to 14, all the industries in the real estate chain were rolling in dividends. Now the golden decade of real estate has passed. Small developers have been eliminated, and large developers have steadily digested the houses that have been hoarded for many years.

and many people are blindly optimistic about their industry. for another example, the current situation is that the communication industry will only get harder year by year before 5G comes out, and it will get better after 5G comes out, but it will not reach its peak. And the basic dividend period of the internet has passed, and the competition behind it will become more and more fierce.

I once wrote an article about how to make my own career planning, "What should I plan for the so-called career planning? 97% of people are wrong! "I suggest you have a look.

Third, recognize the reality and find a balance between family and career.

what I want to say is that today's society is no longer a world where men dominate the outside and women dominate the inside. If family conditions do not allow, if the pressure expands, why not ask parents to help take care of the children earlier, so that my wife can return to the workplace earlier and enhance her core competitiveness?

Also, don't take things too hard. Don't rush to have a second child. When you look at other people's children, you always feel that you are missing something. The premise is that you need to understand the economic strength, parenting energy, family burden, work prospects and so on.

Fourth, finance and study, find the right method for you, and work hard for 365 days.

People are often desperate not because they have nowhere to go, but because they are disillusioned with the future. In fact, no matter what industry you are in, it is very difficult to achieve financial freedom by working these days.

the concept of financial management should be established as soon as possible. In fact, every generation has a path to get rich outside of work. The stock market in 9 years, the house in years, and the bitcoin in 1 years, even if you don't catch up with the best, it is good to buy some Maotai Tencent. Many people in Tencent finally survived the midlife crisis by relying on stocks. There won't be so many such opportunities in the future, but pay attention to the surroundings and there will always be opportunities.

If you want to invest, you'd better give the money to a professional institution, and the success rate will be much higher than if you invest indiscriminately.

Then there's learning. Although middle-aged people can't compete with fresh graduates in any way, there are many problems that you can figure out by yourself because of the precipitation in the workplace and the accumulation of experience, and then you can find the right learning method.

I have spent a lot of money this year, bought dozens of books, and listened to the numerous 4 or 5 channels. The gains must be greater than the investment. For example, I am scheduled to learn about the first lecture of "Career Change: Six Raiders to Ensure Success" by Teacher Yang Yi of LIVE No.1 Workplace Network on December 27th, because I know better than anyone that this course is the only live broadcast course that the company has made every effort to build, and it is also the only one I have ever seen in the world.

I come into contact with dozens of customers every day. Relatively speaking, the consulting fee for one-on-one career change project in No.1 Workplace Network is still quite high. At this time, you can get more than 5, project courses only by using 49 yuan. Do you think it is worth it?

I hope that in 218, we can work hard together, and synchronize the first workplace network WeChat WeChat official account (career-1) with more practical works to make progress with you! ?