Marriage customs in Jiangyin

1, Guo-the man's family will ask the fortune teller to calculate whether the two sides cooperate according to their ages.

2. Giving gifts-usually one month to two weeks before the wedding. The parents of both men and women negotiate all the conditions of marriage, and the man will send bride price (commonly known as bride price or tea gift) to the woman's home according to the agreed conditions. On that day, the man will invite two or four female relatives (who must be blessed, that is, both husband and children, and parents-in-law are present) to do it with the matchmaker, and bring the bride price. Usually, the number of gift cakes, gifts, gifts, etc. As a gift, it is even, which means in pairs.

3, choose a date-the man asked the fortune teller to choose a good day and find a good day to get married, so that the marriage will be smooth and the two will be smooth.

4, move the dowry-in the dowry, in addition to expensive jewelry and gold ornaments, there are many things that symbolize good luck. Use the spittoon as a bucket for children and grandchildren, and hope that your daughter will flourish and your children and grandchildren will be full. Take the red ruler as the future ruler, which means fertile land; Vases represent rich flowers; Copper plates and shoes mean to grow old together; Silver foreskin wrapped around the waist; Scissors refer to butterflies flying in pairs; A pair of dragon and phoenix quilts, sheets and pillows, wishing the couple love and lingering; A piece of candy is a metaphor for sweet happiness; Dragon and phoenix bowls and chopsticks, as food and clothing bowls, indicate ample food and clothing (there is a profitable market in the bowls, which can replace 72 sets of clothes as dowry).

5, bed-a few days before the wedding, a good woman will put a new bed in a good place for the couple, then spread a dragon and phoenix quilt and sprinkle red mung beans, lotus seeds, red dates, longan, walnuts and other happy fruits. Newcomers are not allowed to sleep in new beds after they put them in bed, and pregnant women, people with filial piety and women with moonlight clan are not allowed to enter. In addition, after going to bed, let the children jump out of bed and eat happy fruits, which was called "pressing the bed" in ancient times, meaning opening branches and spreading leaves.

6. Summit-The summit ceremony was held on the night before the wedding or on a suitable day, symbolizing that a couple officially entered adulthood, and they wanted to form a new family and shoulder the mission of spreading branches and leaves. Choose a good time, the man should take a bath half an hour earlier than the woman, and both men and women should take a shower first, and give the "all blessed" people (commonly known as lucky guy/lucky girl, parents and children are needed, and husband and wife are in harmony) a grapefruit dish (grapefruit leaves are said to clean up filth). Then put on brand-new underwear and pajamas, sit by a window that can see the moon, and be combed by a "lucky guy" or "lucky woman" The bride's hair will be combed into a bun to show that she has entered adulthood after marriage. "Lucky guy" or "lucky woman" should say rhyming auspicious sentences when combing their hair, such as "one comb to the end, two combs of white hair, Qi Mei, three combs of children and grandchildren, and four combs of silver bamboo shoots." It means wishing the couple a happy marriage. Finally, the "lucky guy" or "lucky woman" needs to tie cypress and red rope on the head of the bride or groom to complete the ceremony. Because the gyro is a ceremony for parents to bless their children, it is more important.

7. Getting Started-After arriving at the man's house, the bride stepped into the man's house with the help of Daikin. A brazier (copper basin or iron basin) burning charcoal will be placed outside the gate in advance, and the bride needs to cross it. This is called "crossing the brazier", which means prosperity and evil spirits. Next, there is a ceremony to pay homage to the church, which is divided into three steps. The first step is to worship heaven and earth, the second step is to worship ancestors, and the third step is to worship Wengjiagu. After paying homage to heaven and earth and ancestral ancestral ancestral hall, a couple will bow to the parents of the groom, and the bride will offer fragrant tea to the old man and aunt, and then offer tea to the elders one by one according to their generation and age. Whether they kneel or not depends on the respect and preference of both sides. After bowing to their parents, the newlyweds will worship each other. Sister Dajin kept saying some auspicious words, and the ceremony was not completed until they rented each other to pay homage. Two red dates and lotus seeds are usually put in the fragrant tea used by newcomers to worship tea, which symbolizes the good omen of early birth. After drinking the bride's cup of tea, the new family, grandparents and elders will send gold bracelets, jade and other jewelry as a meeting gift for the newly married wife, and also put a gift on the tray of fragrant tea (commonly known as "betel nut box") as a reward for Dajin's sister.

8. Go out-the bride needs the help of a bridesmaid or elder sister with a red umbrella, that is, spreading branches and leaves. Other sisters should also sprinkle rice, red mung beans and gold scraps while walking, commonly known as "feeding the golden rooster", which is said to prevent the golden rooster from pecking at the bride. Before boarding the float, the bride should bow to her relatives and friends to show her gratitude. It must be noted that the person accompanying the bride to the man's house, except Dajin's sister, must be an unmarried woman.

In order to save time, most newlyweds now choose to return home on the same day, that is, the newlyweds go back to the man's house immediately after offering tea to Weng Gu, or go directly to the restaurant. The newlyweds can return home the next day, but not more than the third day, that is to say, the man is dissatisfied with the bride and does not approve the bride to return to her family. Now most of Huimen's gifts are changed to Li except suckling pig.

Reply: 1, (the man sends it to the woman's house):

A golden pig, two boxes of cakes, two bottles of wine, a pair of raw chickens, two kilograms of pork bellies and pork, two baskets of fruit (representing vigorous life), lettuce with the lead (rising with the wind), onion (moving loosely), two boxes of pasta (representing love and lingering) and two sugarcane with the lead and the tail.

Marriage taboo

In fact, there are some taboos for newlyweds to hold weddings according to traditional wedding customs:

1. On the wedding day, when the bride goes out, her sister-in-law can't see her off, because [her sister-in-law] has the sound of sweeping the stars, which is unlucky. The bride should not have pockets in her clothes when she goes out, so as not to take away the wealth at home.

No one can sit in a new bed until the wedding is finished, and the bride can't lie down, so as not to be ill in bed all the year round.

The bride must wear new shoes on her wedding day, which means throwing away old things.

When the bride goes out, she must wear earrings to show her obedience. There are no wearable clip earrings to wear.

5. If the elder of the couple has a deceased person, when offering tea, put the tea offered by the couple where they should sit. After offering tea, remove the stool and let the next person sit.

Have a big gift

The most solemn engagement ceremony is 15 to 20 days before the wedding. The man chooses a good day and brings gifts and various gifts to the woman's house. Today, due to the complexity and time-consuming of this traditional wedding etiquette, the full set of "three books and six gifts" ceremony is rarely used, and the most widely concerned is the gift-giving link: the man's family (the giver) and the woman's family (the giver).

Gifts include:

(1) gift cake: two boxes of Longfeng gift cakes. Gift cakes are divided into four types, six types and eight types, all of which are even.

(2) Coconuts: Parents should use two pairs when they are alive, otherwise one pair should be used.

(3) Tea and sesame: Because tea trees can't be transplanted, seeds must be used when planting, so giving tea as a gift is to wish the son who doesn't grow up. There is also a metaphor, once a marriage contract is concluded, a woman must keep her promise and never go back on her word, which is also called sesame oil tea ceremony.

(4) Two pairs of betel nuts.

(5) Three kinds of animals: two pairs of chickens or geese, two females and two males (only one pair is needed if the parents are not alive). Pork flies in pairs, that is, a few kilograms are split in two and the bottoms are connected together. A pair of fish, usually big fish. (Now it is mostly changed to three sacrifices [profit market])

(6) Seafood: usually four kinds of seafood, abalone, sea cucumber, shark's fin, fish belly and scallop can be used as high-grade seafood; More economical can choose squid, dried shrimps, mushrooms and oyster sauce. Prosperity and frugality are made by people.

(7) Postbox: Of course, there must be gifts in the gift box, and the rest should be added with lotus seeds, lilies, red beans, mung beans, peaches, peanuts, dried longan, dried litchi, cypress and lily. There are two pairs of them, which read: "Five generations under one roof, a hundred children and a thousand grandchildren".

(8) Others: tobacco, alcohol and fruit, whatever you like. Two pairs of dragon, phoenix and candle, don't miss it, two pairs of couplets. Stick couplets in front of the door at the latest the night before the wedding. Never change the left and right by mistake. )

When the woman receives the bride price from the man, she should also return the items that belong to the man's blessing. Awards include:

(1) Half or more of the dowry of the man's family, but it must be in pairs.

(2) Tea, sesame and fruit.

(3) A pair of lotus root, taro and pomegranate. (Lotus root had better have branches and buds. )

(4) Greeting towel (double happiness towel).

(5) A suit or cloth for the son-in-law, a belt, a wallet (with built-in benefits), a pair of shoes and two pairs of socks.

Because the size of clothes varies from person to person, in order to avoid deviation, it is suggested to use profit instead. )

(6) a pair of betel nuts.

(7) Big tea ceremony: including money, fried piles, long profits, Dafa muffins, etc.

Tip: but everything should be simple, replace it with profit, and write "just give a big gift." For example, pork is replaced by "pork gold" and clothing is replaced by "clothing gold". However, some important gifts should be brought in person as far as possible, including: a pair of dragon and phoenix cakes, a number of Tang cakes (about eight), a pair of dragon and phoenix candles, a pair of couplets and a fruit.

The items in the bride price imply auspiciousness, but the quantity must be in pairs, not in singular.

The bride price received by the woman's family is not all accepted by the man's family, and the items blessed by the man's family need to be returned.

Handkerchiefs should not be given as gifts, because it means breaking up.