49 funny quotes suitable for boys to post on Moments

1. I should let you know that I like you.

2. Why do you need to remind me that "money is not everything"? I'm not that greedy. I just want money, I don't expect it to be everything.

3. If you think there is something wrong with me, please tell me. I won’t change it anyway, so don’t hold it in and get sick.

4. I am small-minded but not lacking. I am good-tempered, but not without.

5. The so-called aloofness is actually a person with poor hearing, slow reaction and poor eyesight.

6. Do you blame me for being single? If I hadn't met a self-made hairstylist that year, I would have had a girlfriend long ago, and maybe my children would be able to eat instant noodles and play games with me.

7. Some people say that social phobia comes from low income, but most people’s social phobia comes from high income!

8. You have to save your cuteness, favor your kindness, and become brave. When the world is getting worse and worse, I only hope that you can get better and better.

9. There are some things that we cannot understand when we are young. When we understand, we are no longer young...

10. The secret of a man’s longevity: Eat food that can be digested by the stomach Food, marry a woman who can support you.

11. When you get married in the future, and the person you marry is not me, I will move in next door to your house and be a quiet Laowang.

12. I have a wish not to get tanned, but I have a heart that wants to go out all day long.

13. My wife was imitating me. She stretched out my hand when I stretched it out, and raised my leg when I raised it. So I slapped myself. She looked at me and then slapped me again.

14. "How do you feel when faced with an overwhelming amount of homework?" "You can get my people, but you can't get my heart."

15. Being in a daze. Things, if done well, are called deep. If you don't do it well, you're more likely to fall asleep.

16. I am single because no one can easily match me, the successor of communism.

17. When someone hates me, I will first reflect on myself. Am I too kind and cute to make people jealous?

18. I have two hobbies, static and dynamic. Static is sleeping, and dynamic is turning over.

19. I may not be able to lift a hundred kilograms of stones, but if it is a hundred kilograms of personal coins, I promise to pick it up and run away.

20. Many people who cannot find a partner like to blame others, such as the fat chef or the ugly barber!

21. Don’t be stupid. In this hot summer, only mosquitoes will never leave you.

22. Don’t drag yourself in front of me, the blacklist will tell you that it will be more exciting with you!

23. Everyone “doesn’t know where the love comes from, and goes deeper and deeper.” But I am different. I “don’t know where the money is going, and I am penniless.”

24. When I don’t want to care about you, it’s useless for you to coax me. At this time, you have to send me a red envelope.

25. Making money is a kind of ability, spending money is a kind of skill. My ability is limited, but my skill is very high.

26. Many people say that I am beautiful and cute. I really want to go over and slap her a few times, as if no one knows, and I want you to tell them everywhere.

27. I have three brothers, one is called Dongyan, one is called Xizui, and one is called Naner. What is my name?

28. I would rather believe that there are ghosts in the world than believe in the ever-changing beauty of women.

29. Don’t envy us for not having homework during the holidays. Do you know how tiring it is to play for a day?

30. Mermaids are fake, at least they definitely don’t exist in Chinese history, otherwise they will definitely There will be cooking methods and taste effects passed down.

31. The tourist season is here again. If your monthly income is less than 10,000, please choose domestic travel; if your monthly income is less than 5,000, please choose intra-provincial travel; if your monthly income is less than 2,000, please choose domestic travel. Choose sleepwalking!

32. "What is the most crowded bus you have ever been on?" "You just passed by the bus stop and got squeezed into the bus."

33. Don't scold your children for being Little brat, because genetically speaking, this is not good for parents.

34. I’m warning you, I’m very angry now, don’t make a playful smile with me! When you smile, I can't help but laugh too, which makes me lose face.

35. "Your X-ray shows that your ribs are broken." "What should I do, doctor?" "It's okay, I've fixed it for you with Meitu Xiuxiu."

36. "Now that things have happened, I really regret not listening to my mother." "What did your mother say?" "Damn it, I didn't say I didn't listen!"

37. A man wants to jump off a building, His wife shouted: My dear, don’t be impulsive, we still have a long way to go! After hearing this, the man jumped down. The policeman said: You really shouldn’t threaten him like this!

38. After getting to know you, a sense of intellectual superiority arises spontaneously.

39. I was taking a taxi and found that the driver had taken a detour. I burst into tears. Maybe he was the only person in the world who wanted to stay with me for a while.

40. People say I have a bad temper. It’s a joke. I’m good-looking and have a good temper, so that’s okay.

41. This summer, not going out feels like a waste of life, and going out feels like dying.

42. What bothers me the most is when people tell me that I have read Journey to the West so many times that I know it by heart. You are so awesome. Can you tell me what the content of the Tightening Curse recited by Tang Monk is?

43. Every shopping festival, I buy a batch of prosthetic limbs to sell in my circle of friends, but none of them are sold. What a bunch of scammers!

44. Do you know what is most charming about you? It's the most shameless way when you're obviously really bad but you still pretend to be a good person.

45. The person who least understands that recruitment requires work experience is that Liu Bang had never been president of another country before he became emperor!

46. Love is nothing more than two outcomes: either we go home alone, or we become my mother.

47. As long as you have a clear conscience about everything and everyone, don’t force it if it’s not yours. Anyway, what leaves is the scenery, what remains is life.

48. People used to say that my eyes were small, but I still didn’t believe it. Finally one day, I was lying on the sofa watching TV. Suddenly my mother came back and turned off the TV, and then silently covered it for me. Quilt.

49. Some people say that I am shameless. This is nonsense. How can someone as handsome as me be shameless?