What gives women a sense of security?

Great changes have taken place in our life since the outbreak of the epidemic.

The company delayed the resumption of work, the school delayed the start of school, the temperature limit in and out of the mall, and the economic impact continued to ferment.

At the social level, for many women, the sense of insecurity is rising rapidly, and they always feel that men will betray themselves and their savings are seriously insufficient. The only thing they can trust in the end is money.

Here we need to introduce a conceptual dual attitude system: including people's explicit attitude and implicit attitude.

Experiments show that when discrimination against blacks is prohibited in the United States, people are required to shoot black pictures more often than white pictures in the rapid shooting reaction. This means that quick choice does not require the participation of consciousness.

In this era of great material wealth, money is indispensable

With the changes of the times, it is not only a tool for exchanging materials, but also a social symbol, a social symbol and a steelyard in people's minds.

Looking for a job depends on it; Find an object and rely on it; Even if you find friends sometimes, you should see them.

Although people sometimes don't know that they are measuring it consciously, the choices made subconsciously are often inseparable from it.

Once a person or a thing or a thing is carved into the bones of the times, it is carved into the bones of human nature.

In ancient times, we regarded poets like Li Bai as romantic figures. In modern times, we regard Jobs as an arrogant business elite who changed the world.

It can be seen that our understanding of money has changed a lot.

Although there are advantages and disadvantages, from the perspective of adapting to society, this new thing has an unshakable position since it has not died out for so many years.

We live in this era, and we must conform to the rules of the game in this era, so that we may not be defeated.

Sources of security: self-esteem and sense of control

How to feel safe?

There are two sources, one is social acceptance and recognition, and the other is the fear management theory put forward by Jeff Green Geer and others.

Social acceptance and recognition can make people recognize themselves. People are social animals, and it is impossible to evaluate themselves without society.

Long-term social cognition will gradually turn into stable self-cognition, and good self-cognition will form self-esteem at this time.

According to the theory of fear management, in order to reduce the fear of death, people need to have a sense of control over life, and strengthen the influence of some other social cognitive motives (for example, the need to establish a coherent psychological structure and maintain self-esteem) and a series of daily activities.

Sense of control is the shell of a person's sense of security, and self-esteem is the core of a person's sense of security.

People with strong control will solve most of the difficulties in reality, and people with strong self-esteem will accept the difficulties that cannot be solved. The two complement each other and are indispensable.

The golden rule is made by those who own gold.

The golden rule has long been out of date. At that time, the corresponding thing of gold has been replaced by other things, one of which is money.

So, what role does money play in it?

It is an important source of control and self-esteem, and in some cases, it can even be the most important source.

If money is so important, why do you have to talk about women's bills? Do women and men have different money? Is money important to women but not to men?

Of course not.

Although compared with ancient times, women's social status has risen a lot, objectively speaking, it has not reached the level that women can hold up half the sky.

Emotionally, women have a stronger sense of dependence; In fact, the average salary of women is lower.

According to the light. Com, March 5, the Internet recruitment platform BOSS released the "Report on Gender Pay Differences in the Workplace in China in 2020", showing that in 20 19, the average salary of employed women in China was 6,995 yuan, up 7.7% year-on-year, and the average salary was 865,438+0.6% of that of men.

Although people's minds are gradually opening up, the negative evaluation of men in society is still less than that of women, and women are more vulnerable to ethical accusations, ideological constraints and physical constraints.

For example, men 3 1 flower, women 30 tofu dregs; Men can have three wives and four concubines, and women must be loyal to each other; Facing the interviewer, one of the most difficult interview questions is being asked when to have children.

Although these statements are somewhat extreme, they still have unavoidable influence.

Therefore, the vast number of female compatriots, in the case of less social resources than men, is money important to you, more important than men?

People who have experienced hardships in life must understand this truth.

In fact, many people still have doubts. Can't security come from money? Can't it come from something else?

Of course, family, relatives, friends, a house, a car, and even a piece of clothing in the closet can bring a sense of security after going out.

But the most important sense of security comes from oneself, from the balance of desire and ability.

It's not that money is everything, but when your money can satisfy most of your desires, and you feel tangled and embarrassed when you no longer pay the bill, the charm of self-confidence will shine on you.