Can you tell me one thing or sentence that impressed you most on your child?

I remember that when I gave birth to my daughter, I was in confinement. It was midsummer and the weather was very hot. One night, I was woken up from my deep sleep by swelling and pain in my breasts. When I touched my breasts, they were as hard as It was like a stone. I tried to squeeze but couldn't. I was sweating all over. I had no choice. I shook my sleeping daughter awake and said to her, "Son, please help mommy!" Mommy hurts so much! Suddenly, my daughter opened her sleepy eyes and looked at me. She opened her mouth, sucked the nipple and started eating it. After a while, she felt relieved after eating the milk on one side. She closed her eyes and was about to fall asleep. I continued. , kid, help mom eat the other side! Unexpectedly, she immediately opened her eyes and started eating on the other side. When she finished eating, a surprising scene appeared: she turned her head away, opened her mouth, and spit out all the sucked milk out of my arms! At that time my heart was shocked! She is just a newborn baby and can she understand me? Do you want to help me despite your own pain? This is family love! I must spend my whole life loving her!

My daughter’s math scores have always been very poor. When she first entered high school, her first-year math score was only 45 points. The school announced a parent-teacher meeting. I sat in the classroom and looked through my child's math paper. The first page was full of fill-in-the-blank options, but the accuracy was very low. The second page and onward were basically empty, with only one word in the big question. None. I turned over the paper and saw the cartoon characters drawn by the children at the back of the paper, and I felt quite sad. How miserable this child is! If I can't answer the exam questions, I have to persist until the paper is handed in, and I draw little figures to pass the time. After the parent-teacher meeting, I asked the child if he had difficulty learning mathematics. What's the problem? My child told me, Mom, I can understand the example questions in class, but I can’t do the questions on my own in the exam. There are also teachers who speak too fast and cannot understand without any intermediate process. When I heard that the basics were too poor, I couldn’t keep up with the teacher’s ideas! I told my child, don’t worry. Mom bought you a few tutorial books and you could read them. But after buying the tutorial books, you still couldn’t understand the steps because they were missing. So, when I was at work during the day, I took the time to look at my child's questions, select the most basic questions, complete the steps to solve the problems step by step, and then show it to my child when she comes back from evening self-study in the evening. Then choose a few similar questions and copy a paper for her to take to school. Finish it during evening self-study and give it to me when you get home. In this way, the child's learning amount increases a lot, but the effect is also very good. One night when I was picking up my child from self-study one night, I saw the child leaving the school gate with a smile on his face from a distance. When I got in the car, I asked my mother, what do you think I got in the math test? I said 60? She said 90! Mom, I passed! I passed the math test for the first time and I was so happy. I was also very happy at that time! We saw the results, and we continued to work together like this until we graduated from high school. One night, there were too many questions, and it was almost two o'clock in the middle of the night. My girl raised her tired face, and her eyes were so sleepy that she could hardly open them. I said something that I have remembered for a long time: "Mom, do you know? I really don't like learning math. It's too difficult. I insist on it all because I love you." I felt special after hearing this. Touched, although this kind of dedication makes me feel very tired and hard. I go to work during the day and copy the questions at noon. When I pick up my children at ten o'clock in the evening, I have to continue to lecture and change the questions. I have to get up at around 5 o'clock the next morning to cook. 6 It’s almost time to send the kids to school, I’m so tired! But these words from my daughter made me feel that all the efforts were worth it. I must hold on and be a staunch supporter of my children when they need me most. Three years have passed by, and my children’s math scores are improving faster and faster. Once, I scored more than 130 in the liberal arts exam and ranked first in the class in math. My daughter got the paper and said to me, “Mom, I didn’t even expect that I would. Today is possible!" I told her that hard work will be rewarded. As long as you have the right method and perseverance, you will definitely counterattack.

It has been many years since the college entrance examination. My daughter scored 110 points in the math test. When my child left home, I especially missed this time when mother and daughter studied together. Although it was very tiring, Every time I think of my daughter's words, I feel very happy.

I hope that each of us will not let down those guardians who truly love you and hope that you will grow up healthily.

Here I would like to share two short stories about children with my friends.

01

When my daughter was in the second grade of elementary school, I read an essay she wrote. As a mother, I was particularly moved.

There is a paragraph like this:

"I have a rag doll. She is my good friend. I like her very much, but she has no father and mother. I have to love her well. Unlike me, she will spend her whole life." When I came down, my father and mother prepared a happy home for me so that I could grow up happily."

I burst into tears at that moment. From that moment on, I made up my mind to work hard in this life! Protect my child from any harm.

02

It was probably around 1997. At that time, I was working part-time as a teacher at an adult education college, teaching "Industrial Accounting". Most of the students were managers of some companies.

I remember one time a student invited me to dinner, so I took my daughter with me. During the dinner, a student grabbed my hand and kept saying, "Hello, teacher! Hello, teacher!"

When my child saw it, he suddenly stood up and said righteously: "You are not my father, why do you touch my mother's hand?"

At that time, everyone at the table was very excited. They were surprised, and then they all burst out laughing, which made everyone so embarrassed

Children have a very upright outlook on life, and they can't be underestimated. Father has a sacred status in their hearts, and no one can offend him. Haha

As if in the blink of an eye, it suddenly dawned on me that my daughter was about to graduate from college. Looking back on every bit of the past, I realized that my daughter had invisibly helped me a lot in many things.

When my daughter was about a week old, I bought a toy box with various graphics. I needed to choose the appropriate graphics to pass through the corresponding holes. I consciously cultivated her graphic recognition. I knew the concept. When I was casting the crescent shape, I saw that she was holding it in the opposite direction to the hole, so I asked her to adjust it. After several attempts without success, I was anxious and so was she. She put the toy on the bed and took it. Turning the toy box over, I immediately understood that she didn't know and meant to let me adjust the direction. At that moment, I knew that I had to cooperate well with others and think more from others’ perspectives.

I have also written in previous articles that I ran a business for a period of time after being laid off. In the initial stage, it was very difficult and could be described as unsustainable. At that time, my daughter was in the third or fourth grade of elementary school, and I picked her up once. When school was over, she said: "Dad, there is no business, why don't you go to work?" I fooled her and said no one was hiring. She said: "No, I can find you a job. I've been looking for it for several days! There is a store recruiting typists right next to our school. Don't you know how to type?"

Then For a moment, looking at my precocious daughter, my heart was hit hard, and my eyes were blurred by bitter tears. I must do my best and do everything possible to create a better life!

After my daughter graduated from high school, she had a long summer vacation with very few things to do. When I had free time, I also accompanied her to catch up on anime, and she also watched TV with me for a while and talked while watching it. We were very harmonious. . Once, she asked me, I want to be a master, ride a horse, sit in a sedan, be powerful and majestic, but who will lead the horse and who will carry the sedan?

This is a good question! My answer at that time probably meant: I am born like an ant, with the ambition of a great swan; I am lonely and courageous, and I try my best; I have a lot of talents, move forward with enthusiasm, work conscientiously, abide by my job, take on heavy responsibilities, and move forward with a heavy load. ; Stand up for justice, stand up; be full of passion and be ready to go; do something promising with a heart of inaction, create a happy life, and create a new era that is changing with each passing day.

Tell me one thing that impressed me most about my children.

When my children were in junior high school, there was no online shopping yet. What was crazy was TV shopping. My mother would watch TV at home every day and then make phone calls to shop.

What impressed me most was buying a set of magnetic therapy underwear for each of my brother and my wife.

When the underwear arrived in the mail, I found that there were some small black glue spots stuck to the inside of the underwear. After putting on the underwear, my body became itchy and red.

Then everyone advised mom not to buy random things again.

My mother happily agreed, but when she bought it again a few days later, we all said it to her very angrily.

At this time, my daughter said: "Mom, don't be angry with my grandma. Look at these things that my grandma bought. There are mine, my brother's, and my sister's. There are things from my uncle, there are things from my dad, and all of them are bought for herself."

I thought, isn't it? She bought so many things, but none of them were bought for herself.

I burst into tears at that time. A person of my age cannot be considerate to a teenage child. On the surface, it seems that my mother spent some useless money, but it is not true. A mother’s deep and selfless love for her children!

Alas, every time I think about this, I feel a little sad and moved. I remember that my son had just turned fourteen and had just finished elementary school. He was still studying and greedy. At the age when he was playing, he didn’t want to go to school, and we didn’t pay enough attention to it. Our family had just built a house and had some debts, so we couldn’t think of making filters with his aunt’s family. At that time, we were far away from home and there was no transportation. It's convenient, and it's hard to go and see it. Even though I'm not outside, I still miss it in my heart. Later, I heard my third uncle tell me that he came to his daughter’s house and met my son. He was very nice there and teased him, Wei, are you homesick? Come back with me. What do you think my son said? He said, I miss home, but if I don’t go back, I still have to earn money to pay off my debts. When I heard this, I felt sour in my heart and shed tears in my eyes. Alas! My son knows how to share the burden for the family at such a young age. It’s hard for him. Children's growth requires constant guidance and encouragement.

My son’s college experience was not ideal. When the admission notice came out, I had a long talk with him. My son and I get along like friends. We don’t talk easily, but when we talk, we touch on the painful points. I still remember that conversation. First of all, the reason why college is not ideal is not that you don’t work hard, but that you don’t know how to study, have no goals, and have no direction.

The second is how to spend the next four years of college. I only told him three things about college: join the party, take the postgraduate entrance examination, and join the student union. Joining the party proves that you have a positive heart. Taking the postgraduate entrance examination shows that your knowledge is not enough, and you need to be a lifelong learner. Join the student union to practice your ability to deal with people.

My son remembered that long conversation and will see the results next. As soon as I entered the military training as a freshman, I showed active performance, sang songs, ran errands for teachers, participated in various school activities, and lost a lot of weight in a month. In the end, the class of fifty-five students voted 48 times to be elected monitor.

Submitted the application for joining the party and submitted the ideological report on time. I started preparing for the postgraduate entrance examination in my sophomore year. Because of the epidemic, school has not started yet, and my son has been reviewing at home. Make a study plan, review, exercise, and play ball every day. Many parents are confused about how to communicate with their children. When your child has a problem, you shouldn't just complain about why you are like this? How could you do this? Instead, calmly analyze it for him and tell him what to do next. In this way, he will not be immersed in the shadows of the past, but will clearly know what to do next.

This incident changed my son’s life.

One of the things that impressed me the most is something I will never forget in my life. One time, my child’s aunt brought a pack of red date yogurt from home, a big pack, and then my child’s grandma put it in the refrigerator. Dabao asked for it. Drink, grandma said that the things in the refrigerator were cold, so she boiled the soup with hot water and gave it to the child. After drinking it, the child had vomiting and diarrhea at night. I took a look and found that the yogurt had expired for five or six days. The aunt left the child at home without anyone to drink it. She didn't look at the date of birth. The old lady scalded it with hot water and spoiled it. Then I felt really bad for her. I felt like she was going to vomit out the jaundice water. My heart was broken. When it came to his throat, I didn't sleep for a few days. I took him to fetch water because I was too reckless and stupid.

I didn't take him to a big hospital for a checkup, but he looked at it at the People's Hospital. After a few days of hanging up, the water finally recovered. I really didn't dare to sleep at night because he was going to vomit soon, so I sat at the head of the bed. Really I didn't sleep for two days and two nights. I was afraid and worried and had no intention of sleeping. Then I quit my job and took care of the child by myself. Originally, I took care of the child by myself. When I went to work, when the child got older, I asked my grandma to check on her at home. Alas, Who knows that you still can't fake it! It is really difficult to take care of children, and it is not easy to take care of them, so mothers should take care of them themselves when they have time. Listen more, ask more questions and read more books. Once the children are taken care of well, everything will be fine. After all, it is the mother's business when the child gets sick!

When my son was in the middle class of kindergarten, there was a parent-teacher meeting that happened to be Mother's Day. The child's teacher very warmly recorded a video in advance, and each child said a sentence to his mother. Most of the children said things like "Mom, I love you forever," and "I wish my mother will always be young and happy." One child said, "Mom, I wish you a fortune," which made everyone laugh.

When it was my son's turn, I saw the child timidly facing the camera and saying: "Mom, thank you for looking at me every day."

A parent next to him burst into laughter, probably laughing at what the child said.

But at that moment, my heart seemed to be severely tugged, and tears flowed out, because I understood what my son meant, because this is what I have been complaining about my husband all day long!

"Look after the children every day, look after the children every day, am I sold to your maid or the old woman you paid to hire? I am almost bored to death!"

The child understands Yes, keep it in mind.

I almost raised the children by myself. When my husband’s career was on the rise in the past few years, he first studied for a postdoctoral degree at Tsinghua University, and then went abroad as a visiting scholar for half a year. When he came back, he focused on work. He worked overtime on business trips. normal. My parents-in-law are in poor health and haven’t given me any help since I got married. My mother is willing to help me, but my father is very patriarchal and believes that grandma and grandpa are not obligated to take care of my nephew. If my mother stays with me for a while, he will behave in different ways and make troubles. Fortunately, my job does not require me to work, so I only ask my mother to come when there are classes (we live in the same city). At other times, I grit my teeth and persevere by myself. What I fear most is that my child gets sick, catches a cold or has a fever, and I stay with him alone, not daring to sleep all night.

I also thought about hiring a nanny, but my mother rejected it from the beginning. She thought that her presence was enough. I was not busy at work, so why couldn’t I even watch the child? But she didn't know that my career had stalled. I graduated with a Ph.D. at the age of twenty-seven and a half, became an associate professor at the age of twenty-nine, and gave birth to a child at the age of thirty, which ended abruptly.

My mother is very stubborn. No one can change the things she believes in, otherwise she will fall out with you.

I endured and endured, and finally made myself depressed. I don’t want to talk all day long, and when I talk I just complain. I don’t dare to blame others, so I can only blame my husband.

In those few years, I probably lived like a resentful woman. But my son’s words immediately woke me up. As soon as I came out of kindergarten, I found a corner and cried so hard that no one else paid attention.

After crying, I felt that my mind suddenly became brighter. Yes, what should I complain about? I am willing to have children. I strongly support my husband’s study abroad. He is not a shabby person. He works hard and is rising step by step. Every penny he earns is given to me. The key is We have been in love since our freshman year, we studied for Ph.D.s together, started from scratch, and worked hard together, so there is no problem with our relationship. The most important thing is that even if we adults make any mistakes, the child is innocent. His birth was not his own choice. It is not his fault that he needs someone to take care of him and needs someone to watch him every day. But he told me, Mom, Thank you for looking at me every day.

What a failure as a mother I am!

From that day on, as if I had been reborn from Nirvana, I began to face my own problems:

First, I was too serious. I had to take care of every bit of my child’s life. My husband had I also wanted to help when I had free time, but I was so dissatisfied and uneasy with him that I gradually pushed him further and further away.

Second, you are too perfectionistic and always want to do the best in everything and satisfy everyone, but in fact it has no benefit except adding trouble.

Third, he is not broad-minded and even a little sensitive.

Because my career has stalled, I am always worried that my colleagues will laugh at me and my husband will look down on me and get into trouble at every turn.

Thank you son for these words! From that day on, I changed myself little by little and began to try to let my husband take care of the children alone. I went out shopping and began to accept my imperfect self and imperfect life. That summer, the three of us took a short trip to the beach together, and everything started to go on track.

Now my son is in sixth grade, a sunny and cheerful young man of 175 years old. I also became a professor 4 years ago. My husband is still as busy as ever, but we are very happy.

There are so many things about children that I can’t count. The one I remember the most is this one:

My son is over 2 years old and he still doesn’t know the difference between washing the footbath and the rice basin. , after eating, he threw his small bowl into the footbath. My husband got so angry that he almost got a slap.

I carefully told him the difference between a footbath and a rice basin, but my son was still confused.

Another year passed. At that time, we had a dog in our yard. My son liked to squat next to the dog and defecate. The dog ate his poop and licked his hair.

I saw my son thinking quietly, and suddenly he said: "Mom, wash my hair."

"Why?" My son has never liked washing his hair. , I have to do work every time and use toys to coax her. This time I took the initiative to wash my hair, which I didn’t understand very much.

"Look, the dog ate poop and its mouth was dirty. It licked my hair again, so wasn't my hair dirty?"

Hearing this, I Fortunately, it seems that there are some things that don't make sense. It's not that the children don't understand, but they don't have that level of thinking.

We must learn to wait and wait for our children to grow.