How to maintain a good relationship with others?

At 1 1 in the evening, there was a faint iron tapping sound, and then a male voice shouted. After listening for a while, I guess which host came home late, knocked at the door unsuccessfully, or didn't open the door in time, so he lost his temper outside the door and heard him scold the doorman: TMD! What is this? ! ……

We live in the family courtyard of a public institution. Traditional family homes are mostly colleagues who work in the same unit but don't look up. The janitor may be a relative of the leader who went to the countryside. Everyone is generally kind. Our family courtyard is a bit special. Many houses were built in those years, and one building was sold as a "commodity building", and the people living there were very mixed. Although there are doormen, it's not like formal property management. There is a small blackboard hanging at the door all the year round, which reads:

Note: it opens at 5 am and closes at night 1 1.

Signature: Bureau Office

At night 1 1 After locking the door, if the owner enters or exits the gate again, he will ring the doorbell to disturb the doorman. At first, the doorbell to the reception room rang at the gate. Later, the line probably aged and nobody took care of it. People who come home late can only stand outside the double-door iron gate and shout:

Uncle, open the door! Uncle! Grandpa ... Grandpa! ! !

The reception room is at the end of the corridor. It is an iron house with an area of less than 10 square meter. I shouted several times, if the light in the message room doesn't work, I have to knock on the iron gate with a lock in the middle of the night and make a metal crash to wake up the uncle.

I don't think grandpa will go to bed at midnight 1 1. "When you get older, you feel less." This is what my grandmother said. But it is easy to get sleepy when you are old, and it is ok to take a nap. Especially in the cold winter in the north, it is not a willing thing to climb out of the warm bed and open the door for the late host.

I used to go home at eleven or twelve in the middle of the night and stand outside the gate, feeling particularly guilty. After ringing the doorbell or knocking at the door, my uncle appeared in the reception office. As soon as the key rang, I humbly bowed my head outside the gate:

Sorry, ha! Uncle, it's so late, please get up and open the door. ...

Once the new doorman asked me why you came back so late. What do you do? !

I said, I'm sorry, the company just had a meeting, or I'm sorry, I just got back from a business trip ... Then, while opening the door lock of the building, I wondered what my uncle said: What are you doing back so late? !

Uncle, is there anything wrong? !

Probably because I am a woman, or maybe because I always apologize first and feel particularly guilty. I'm sorry to disturb you to get up and open the door so late ... Grandfathers received that sincere letter and didn't express any special complaints.

Because Comrade Jason works from home, he receives a lot of express delivery every month. Sometimes I buy things online and send them home by express. Sometimes there is no one at home, and I need the doorman to sign for them. The doorman who used to work shifts was familiar with his face, so it was no problem to put it away. Later, two new doormen said that they would no longer sign for express delivery ... indeed. The doorman's salary was paid by the bureau, and we "owners" didn't pay any property management fees. People just look at the door, it's not their job to receive express delivery ... it's a bit of a headache to think about it.

My father often tells us: don't say hello when you meet your neighbors in the corridor! Or "Say hello when you meet an acquaintance in the yard!" Don't pretend to be blind and ignore "pretending to be big", which will be very annoying ... "Before he retired, in his work and life, he often brought some snacks or wrapped jiaozi to the reception room to show to the doorman at the school gate on holidays. My mother sometimes reminds him that people belong to the security department, not to you. Can you send something? He followed the tradition of the army and felt indifferent.

Because we are not so annoying owners, we are also more polite to the doorman. Comrade Jason took a few boxes of cigarettes to befriend others, sending moon cakes in the Mid-Autumn Festival and dried fruits in the New Year, and sometimes cutting half a watermelon in the past ... so now the doorman no longer refuses our express delivery.

The neighbor who came home late was right. The neighbor also made me reflect. The premise of the relationship is mutual understanding and respect. When you call an old man much older than you "something" with national abuse in the middle of the night, the relationship will deteriorate without respect. Maybe his social status is not as high as yours. He is just an ordinary doorman or an ordinary cleaner. Maybe that's his duty. It is a matter of course to get up and open the door to clean up. ...

If you have the minimum understanding and respect in your heart, the other party will definitely repay you with the necessary convenience.

How to communicate with people is the most common confusion people encounter in society. Recently, I'm reading Matsuura Yataro's Live Today with Heart. Those trivial things from daily life inspired him greatly, and he could learn from gentle people and cunning people. There is no need to investigate the good and evil of human nature. If we take the initiative to forgive others' unintentional mistakes, then at least we are beautiful inside, and others see a beautiful life from us.

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