Campus sketch

Women are funny versions of tiger sketches.

Characters:

Father-in-law: Retired at home, with a salary of more than 2,000 yuan, humorous.

Mother-in-law: I am idle at home and like to nag.

Daughter-in-law: cultural station staff.

Grandson: Primary school students

An ordinary rural family.

Li Na: (singing) Women are Tigers.

The old man went to the table to play cards.

Grandma has admitted it,

My wife is narrow-minded,

Wear eyes when playing cards.

Play a card, play a card,

The old man secretly guessed:

Why doesn't my daughter-in-law win my money,

Bring the tea.

Grandma whispered to the old man:

Such a daughter-in-law is the best,

The old man stamped his foot anxiously,

My wife hid my hookah.

Daughter-in-law: (holding father-in-law's hookah)

Sing: (purple bamboo tune) Tell Grandpa to listen to me.

Smoking too much is harmful to health,

If you want to be healthy, drink more soy milk.

Drink less sugar when drinking soybean milk.

Call my father-in-law and drink less sugar soy milk.

Mother-in-law: (singing San Xiao) Scold old things,

Just don't love yourself, play cards all day,

Bad luck, always breaking money every day,

Find a Diaoyutai tomorrow,

I said, old man,

Catch some small fish and burn pickles.

Grandpa: hookah card, my favorite,

Report one's old age to heaven, take it into the coffin,

Quit smoking and gambling, to be clear,

Hang yourself with a rope.

Mother-in-law: (Bring the rope, bring the stool)

(singing) I'll wait for you here,

When you come back, look at the peach blossoms.

I'll wait for you here,

Waiting for you to come back, where flowers bloom.

Shua shua.

Grandfather: (Stand on the stool, make a lasso and pretend to put it in. )

(Singing excerpts from White-haired Girl) You are forcing me to die and blinding your eye socket.

I am running water and an eternal fire.

I won't die, I want to live.

Grandson: (just after school, I put down my schoolbag and hugged my grandfather's leg)

It's easy to hang yourself, just stick your head out,

Grandpa can't die, you are a cornucopia.

(Curtain closed)

Funny sketch script

Tang-Tang priest

Sun the Monkey King

Pig-Pig Bajie

Sandy

White (white)

(Narrator: According to legend, Tang Priest and his disciples went to the Western Heaven to learn Buddhist scriptures. On this day, the four of them crossed Heifengling and came to a village where smoke curled up like an inn. Four people are tired from running, so let's rest here ...)

Tang: The ancient road is thinner with the west wind, and the small bridge is flowing. Wukong is hungry. Go and eat some vegetarian food!

Sun: Master, aren't you losing weight? That fat burning cost us a lot of money! how can ...

Don: (impatiently) You monkey head, don't talk nonsense. Can't you see that being a teacher is all skin and bones? On the way to the Western Heaven to learn from the scriptures, how many demons and ghosts compete to see the scenery of being a teacher? How can they let people go home disappointed? !

(Catwalk around the field, stop and pose)

Sun: Yes, Master. I am on my way. Don't blame me for not reminding you when I'm full.

Don: You're getting annoying. Let's go!

Sun: Yes, Master. Bajie, Friar Sand, take care of Mr. Tang. I'll be back soon.

(Sun Xia)

Don: This monkey head, why is there so much bird talk in his mouth?

Pig: Master, he is not satisfied that I have passed Band 4, so he tries hard day and night to surpass me!

(After a while)

Don: Hey, Bajie, look, there's a beautiful woman coming over there!

(as a vision)

Pig: Master, really! How beautiful!

(as a swab)

Don: (shamefully, softly)

Sin, sin ... Bajie, you are rude again.

(Handing a handkerchief)

Wipe your mouth ... but it's a pity that your skin is a little dark. ...

(Pig and sand are startled)

(Women fly by)

Sha: Stop! Hello, girl. How old are you? What's your name? Where are you from and where are you going?

Go to the park, do you have anyone, what's in your basket, do you know there are many monsters on this road?

It's okay. I can protect you.

Bai: The young monk is welcome. My little girl's surname is Bai, and her name is Jingjing. She is Sprite-Jingjing is bright and cool.

(Three people are fascinated)

Bai: I'm going to Datang to take the computer grade exam. Are all the masters from the East Tang Dynasty?

Try to find the net Vo [VS

Pig: You're right! We are all monks in the Tang Dynasty. I wonder what language this lady speaks.

Bai: FORTRAN is also!

Don: (shoulders shaking with excitement, eyes flashing)

To tell the truth, the examiner of FORTRAN is the second cousin of the young monk. If the young lady can ... the young monk can help. ...

Sun: (around the court)

Where is the Uber who dares to harass? Master, don't worry. I will come!

(Catch the pig and give it a high five)

Who are you? Tell me your name!

Sun: Sorry. I accidentally lost my contact lenses on the way and couldn't tell who was who.

Don: This monkey is becoming more and more useless. Friar Sand, lend him my glasses.

(Sha takes out his glasses and puts them on Sun)

Sun: (rushing forward and stopping)

It's you.-Monica!

Bai: Steven! Is it really you?

When the music of Titanic began, Sun Bai looked at each other and made an emotional gesture. )

Pig: Oh, my God! Couple!

Don: (wiping tears) It's so touching. I haven't seen such a touching scene since I read the story of Jack and Ross!

Sha: (hands Don a towel)

Master, don't make people laugh. That's the Titanic.

(to the audience)

Last time I passed Dahua Cinema, he dragged us to see it and cried himself ... Alas, my master is too sentimental. ...

Pig: Brother, this is ...?

Sun: Monica and I went to college together. ...

Bai: At that time, Steven was the physical education committee member in the class, and I was the representative of English class. ...

Bai: He takes me home every night.

Sun: He calls me every night.

Sun: We always like to take a walk in the Woods at night. ...

Bai: He always tells me ghost stories, which makes me (shy and strong).

(Three people are fascinated, Sun Bai is remembering)

Pig: I see. Brother Hou still likes to sing: only you,

Can make my sky bright, only you can make me ...

Sun: Hum your head .. (punch him so far)

Sha: Since we are acquaintances, then ... Oh, no, monkey, you are not human, so Miss Bai. ...

Don: (yelling, falling backwards) Please escort, monster!

Sun: (in a dilemma) Monica, I'm going to the Western Heaven with Master now, so don't embarrass me for old times' sake. ...

Bai: Bianshui, Surabaya, flows to Guazhou ancient ferry. Wu Shan is a little worried, thinking about dragons and hating them, and he won't stop until he returns. Yueming people lean on the building. Five hundred years, Steven. Do you really miss me at all?

Sun: Things have changed. I'm not who I used to be. Your old boat ticket can't get on my broken boat. Why should you? ...

Pig: If a relationship lasts for a long time, it can't last forever ... Miss Bai, you and I are in the same boat. ...

Sun: Shut up! Pig!

Don: Wukong, this is your fault. Miss Bai is so infatuated, but you are so heartless and don't understand amorous feelings. God, what a tragedy. ...

(Friar Sand continues to pass the towel to Tang)

Bai: Steven, I'm not here to arrest your master this time. I just want to tell you that there is another person in this world who will miss you forever. Since you are bent on seeking Buddha's progress, I can't stop you. I'm ... I have to go.

(Take a few steps and turn around quickly)

May you be happy.

(Go, turn around)

If you need anything, call me.

(Go, turn around)

Motorola pager, sending messages anytime, anywhere. ...

(below)

(Music: Leave the sadness to yourself ... Four people are relatively speechless ...)

Don: (Hands folded) Life is precious, but love is more expensive. If you want to learn from the scriptures, you can throw them both! Wukong! I think you’ve put your finger on it. amitabha ...