Dr. House's funny lines, Dr. House, I love you.

1. In order to buy a house in the viewing center, Han Yan called the country: "What happened to that house now? North and South are transparent, surrounded by sunshine, the price is reasonable, the children are innocent, the welfare is divided, the folk customs are simple, and one should have a normal heart ~ "Han Yan:" How dare you say that you are surrounded by sunshine? I have never seen the sun! This is called North-South Unicom? Because it is east-west! That's called simple folk customs. Before the cock crows in the early morning, the Yangko team and the Peking Opera team at the bottom of the building began to make trouble! That's a fair price, isn't it? ! I think there is not a penny less for water, electricity, gas, property, garbage disposal and heating! Three months ago, if I had made up my mind not to listen to your bluff, the house price would not have risen to this virtue? I tell you, today you are just talking about novels, three stories and four stories. It's no use crying with your thighs! I will buy it today! " 2. Han Yan "calls" the country Han Yan: "To tell you, I am limited to you. If I don't see you within a fragrance, you will never see me again! " 3. Zhou Chen rushed to the sales center and listened to the sales staff bragging with Han Yan. Zhou Chen was unambiguous.

Sales man: "Like Mr. and Ms., they are dignified in appearance, open-minded in heart, shy in flowers, well-proportioned in trees and good-looking." What I admire most are talented people and beautiful women like you. How can people like you tolerate an unsatisfactory living environment, especially white-collar workers, and it is easy to fall into the quagmire of holding money and watching. " At first glance, miss, you are the person who will enjoy life the most. We welcome owners like you most. "National:" Don't welcome me? ! "Salesman:" What do you think this is? " ! If you can be the owner of this community, we will be very happy! We will feel honored and honored. All the staff of our developer will carry forward the traditional continuous fighting under your aura and go forward bravely to contribute to the great goal of realizing the happy life of the majority of owners at an early date ~ "Han Yan:" I said, young man, your eloquence is really good! " National: "Oh, son ~ I have long seen that you have a good eloquence and potential, and the times before me have passed? Behind me, where is the next generation? ! ""house seller: "I'm an inferior person. I know I have half a catty, sir. You are full of economy and technology, not showing mountains and water, occasionally showing off! "It's really ..." National: "No, I'm flattered ~ you are a professional speaker. I play axe in front of Lu Ban, broadsword in front of Guan Gong, undress in front of prostitutes, and show my figure in front of models. I am better than Yao Ming. I might as well really look at the sea and sigh that I was born at the wrong time. Why did I give birth to you, and I thought of heaven and earth, with no limit and no end?

Han Yan: "Have you seen our section chief? He is only 1.8 meters tall and walks around under the bed. After living in a tall building, the habit of seeing things has changed, changed! " Lingling, an old classmate of Han Yan, looked at the house and passed by Han Yan's house. I heard that she wants to buy a high-rise building.

Lingling: "Buy a high-rise house? ! Are you stupid? The water supply for high-rise buildings can't go up, and the water needs secondary pollution. Besides, what if the elevator breaks down? It's not just climbing stairs and locking you in the elevator. It will be even worse if you can't get out! " 6. The statement that Han Yan and the country are poor in visiting villas and sales staff, though poor, reveals the advertising reality in various sales advertisements. I like this part best! ! ! Seller: "Can I help you, sir?" Han Yan: "Ah ... just looking around." Seller: "But if you are here, you can't just look." National: "Then let's take a closer look." Seller male: "Do you want to see the villa anyway?" Han Yan: "Ah, yes! My classmate introduced us. " Man selling a house: "I see (I see). So, what do Miss Wang and Miss Wang do?" Han Yan: "Ah ... My husband works in energy." Selling a house man: "Interesting! Our project has also attracted a large number of high-end people related to energy, including Shanxi, Shaanxi and Inner Mongolia ... I believe that if you can choose our villa project, your life will definitely become more perfect! " Han Yan: "No, no, it's too perfect to live." National: "Who said that? ! I would rather live perfectly than die with regret! " Selling a house man: "So I think! I think it is very necessary to tell you what kind of villa is perfect. " National: "All ears." Seller: "Stay away from the hustle and bustle of downtown, enjoy a quiet life, return to nature, enjoy rural scenery, sit in a bustling city, and play the romantic role of Venice in the East." Broad vision, overlooking the city, private territory, warm in winter and cool in summer! Baroque architecture Gothic architecture, personalized apartment design keep up with the fashion trend! Neighborhood is close, harmonious and warm, super green, full of green, close to the central business district and the central government district, with a strong humanistic and academic atmosphere, embracing health, enjoying comfort, convenient life at your fingertips and humanized environmental management; Convenient transportation extending in all directions! It is definitely an ideal place for you to enjoy a happy childhood, passionate youth, happy marriage and harmonious middle-aged and elderly people! You said that even if this villa is not perfect, it is at least excellent ~ "National:" Young man, I think the thing is this-away from the hustle and bustle of the city because of its remote location; Return to nature, because it is in a suburban town; Sitting in a bustling city is because it is close to a vegetable market: an out-of-print waterfront mansion is actually a stinking ditch; What is the reason for the romantic feeling? Because you dug another broken pool. The vision is wide because your villa community is on the mountain; Private territory is because you are the only villa community on the mountain; When you build a dome, it is considered baroque, and when you build a spire, it is considered gothic. If your apartment is not good, say it is personalized design; If the distance between buildings is small, it is said that the neighborhood relationship is close; Weeds are overgrown outside the window, so it is called super-large-scale greening; There is a rural credit cooperative next to it, called the central business district; There is a village government at the foot of the mountain, which is said to be the core landmark of the central government area. Coupled with the third-rate private colleges, it is said that the humanities and academic atmosphere is strong. Adding a barefoot doctor can be said to embrace health; The canteen doesn't even have soap, which can be said to be a convenient life at your fingertips; If the security guard is a bit fierce, it is said to be humanized management; The two-way nine-headed bus is said to have convenient transportation extending in all directions. I think those coal bosses in Shanxi and those shoe bosses in Wenzhou ate a daze meal and drank a mouthful of water before buying your house. Otherwise, they just want to wait for the villa to appreciate and earn the difference profit in the middle. Do you think I'm right? ~ "7. The feelings of nationals and Han Yan after seeing the villa. Status: "What do you mean people are alive? Don't you just want to live a rich, extraordinary and not bleak life? Ah ... "8. Han Yan felt very uneasy when she repaid her mortgage, so she complained to the government. Han Yan: "From now on, my repayment date is as accurate and regular as the physiological cycle ..." National: "That may not be true. Han Yan: "Is there any way you can repay the loan in advance?" You see, you are 30 years old now, and your physiological cycle is 20 years, but our mortgage is 30 years ~ Han Yan: Are you bored? People feel sad ... "Statement:" It seems that we feel sick for a few days every month ... "9. In order to save money, Han Yan and the state government found a tricycle and moved by themselves, but now they are. Security guard A: "Hey, hey, do you know where this is? "Did you enter that place? ! "national:" RRRR…… ....................................................................................................................................................................... Security guard A: "Ouch! I have seen waste collectors, never seen you like this! " Security guard B: "Get down ... get down. Know ... know where this is? ! Tens of thousands of Bie Ye! National: "Bie Ye, big and big ... I haven't seen it. "Security guard A:" There is a rule in this community that people who collect waste products outside are not allowed to enter. "National:" Dude, if you let me go, I'll go. Then I'm embarrassed. Do you know where I come from? "Security A:" It's none of my business! Do you know who my grandfather is? " National: "Who is it?" Security guard A: "Owner!" Li Guo took out his key and said, "Then I am your grandfather. Han Yan: "I am your grandmother." "Security guard A looks innocent:" Then why haven't I seen you? "National:" I didn't move here. Where are you going to meet me? " ! Help me push the cart ~ "Security guard A: Alas! 10. Han Yan thinks that living in a villa is the neighbor of the rich and the elite who don't have a car, so she asks the country to go out and buy a car. Car seller: "Dude, do you want a car? This is a brand-new Li Xia car with no more than 40 scratches. Take a look. " National: "How much is it?" Car seller: "How can such a new car be 30 thousand yuan?" National: "Thirty thousand! I spent 30,000 yuan on three Li Xia cars last year, all of which are new! " Car seller: "Don't tease me, buddy, how much do you want for such a new car?" National: "Twenty thousand." Seeing that Li Guo was leaving, the car seller said, "Twenty thousand dollars is too little for you, man, man! How can I not add twenty! " National: "Deal!"