202 1 year-end summary

From one change to another, from one time and space to another, it is difficult to choose between good and bad, only to have a clear conscience; Whether you choose success or not, there is light behind it.

—— Southern Weekend 202 1 New Year Message

0 1.

202 1 1 4. After reading "Thirteen Invitations | The Problems We Are Deeply Involved in but Didn't Talk about".

You met Mr. Xiang Biao, and from then on, "take yourself as the law" lingered in your mind.

In "Xu Zhiyuan and Thirteen Invitations", you saw "take yourself as the law".

When interviewing Faye Yu, he was so reckless and shy;

Embarrassment and paranoia about the commercialization of one-way space when talking with Wu Xiaobo;

When interviewing Wang, do a group performance;

Try to improvise when interviewing Lai Shengchuan;

When interviewing Rocket Girl 10 1, he said that "everyone should try to find their own possibilities";

When interviewing Tsun-shing Chen, he said, "Finding that light is the theme of your life." .

Do you think the book "My Two Students" is to some extent the practical result of Mr. Huang Deng's "taking oneself as the law"?

You sigh with emotion: "There should be more observers, recorders and expressors as keen as yellow lights in this era!"

Her description of social division, "human reproduction" and the relationship between two students as individuals and the times is so accurate and profound.

But at the same time, her emotional expression is so restrained.

Even in love, what you see is "taking yourself as a method".

The Chinese department fell in love with the wedding vows of the history department, and the bride said:

"We are all aware of each other's limitations and smallness. We stand here today because we want to regard marriage as a test and ourselves as a method to practice the exploration of intimate relationship and a better life. "

This year, you are also trying to become a practitioner of "taking yourself as the law".

In this era of "people disappearing" brought by instrumentalization, you try to pull away from your psychological space and establish contact with others.

You constantly try to get into things to build understanding, and then make judgments through appropriate alienation to form your own views.

You want to do an experiment with your own life, hoping that your daily lifestyle, choices and orientations can form some kind of resource voice.

As Goethe said, "in this restless age, people who can hide in the depths of quiet passion are happy."

This year, you enjoyed such happiness.

02.

202 1 March 14 you said:

"I really want to turn my life to the last page and see who is accompanying me to the old age."

You didn't stop writing to your future girlfriend until that person appeared.

That kind of happiness lasts from spring to summer. Finally, you wrote a poem: When spring disappears completely.

Soon I wrote another song-"There is a vast universe in my heart":

In the face of death and forgetting/we are too busy/you don't have to guard me/there is a vast universe in my heart.

During that time, you had a lot of self-doubt,

You don't understand why you are destined to be a deductive system in love.

You said "the stars should be in the sky".

I said I really wanted to see my love before, but then you did, but with someone else.

When you see a man shaking hands with a woman at a wedding, you will also feel relieved.

Do you still remember that in the TV series Paradise, Rui Xiao Dan pointed to Feng Shijie's hometown and said to Ding Yuanying:

This is the gift I want. You wrote me a myth.

I don't know if this is a gift from heaven or a prank, but you have met a suitable soul like Rui Xiao Dan.

You read books in Sisyphus and The Little Prince's Story together.

The little prince said, "One day, I watched the sunset forty-four times."

In this dramatic way, you have reached the same ending as the little prince and the rose.

You wrote this poem-"I have been close to your soul countless times";

Your soul and I have been to many places/five years of Flower Lane Church/fifty years of rocking chair time.

You will think of the poem written by Lin when he returned to Xu Zhimo's hometown-"Don't throw it away".

You think of Xu Yuan's tears when he read this poem.

"The same is the bright moon, the same is the lamp on the other side of the mountain, the stars all over the sky, but people can't see it, hanging like a dream."

Whenever you end a relationship and haven't had time to come out, you will write a little poem.

Later, I learned that, in fact, to some extent, I gained a false subjectivity after turning it into a problem.

But Liu Qing said, "This is not a real solution", so you were lost in thought.

After thinking about it, I still thought of the words you wrote after watching the drama Peach Blossom Spring:

When Lao Tao arrived at the Peach Blossom Garden, he still couldn't let go of the fetters in his heart.

Liu Ziji can't find the Peach Blossom Garden, but he is also the Peach Blossom Garden that crazy women are struggling to find;

Jiang has been waiting for a ten-minute reunion with the cloud all his life. Even this result is just a crush on the peach blossom garden in the director's heart.

Of course, he knows that in the real world, he has waited all his life and will never see his pure white camellia.

Paper money and peach blossoms are completely different and complement each other.

We searched all the way and got lost.

03.

On June 23rd, 20021year, you wrote a poem in a circle of friends:

When I am swallowed up in the dark/darkness.

I am looking for a lamp/when I find it/I become a lamp.

This darkness can no longer devour me/but it will devour more people.

I have more ambitions/inner constraints.

How to redeem yourself by being pushed forward by life?

When I'm in the dark/how can I find the dawn?

You call yourself a poet and an idealist.

You said, "A poet can't stay in one place all the time, wandering and lonely, writing poems. This is my life. "

But when the pressure of life strikes, you will still feel confused.

Your friend said, "The ideal is precious, but if it conflicts with reality, I think the ideal still needs to give in.". We cannot do without it. "

You remembered the story of Professor Wang Defeng again. He said:

"What if you don't have enough to eat? independent personality ...

The moment I stepped out of the gate, I was very sad, because my faith was passively shaken.

I thought I understood this truth, and I wanted to inspire people's wisdom.

But I became a slave myself. "

Qian Liqun said that "treating this coast with idealistic care" may reduce a lot of anxiety.

When you saw Liu Yi translate the full version of Love the Land, she said:

"And this is not directly related to our work and academic performance, so we are interrupted again and again and continue again and again.

However, these disturbances have not dampened our persistent tepid obsession. "

You have heard the story of Mohe ballroom and Lao Zhang Mandquan.

"What makes people beautiful, why do they wither,

Did it anger the god of rest, or did it envy your beauty,

It is your fiery appearance, but it is also your fiery retreat. "

You have established your own reader group "Xiaokang and Friends", hoping to gather your knowledge in the dialogue, and then move forward in the spring with hope.

You wrote a gift to all planners, "to urban planners: swim until the sea turns blue and swim until you embrace your dreams."

When guiding the competition, you said to your brothers and sisters, "Our goal is not the national competition, but the sea of stars."

On your birthday, you wrote the article "Twenty-one Years Old, My Confusion and Persistence", and received many sincere blessings from readers on the official WeChat account.

Some friends even wrote,

"I am the same age as you and live under the same roof.

It never occurred to me,

On the night when I was twenty-one,

Write to a stranger I've never met ... "

There are many other letters from readers,

"It seems that you are a bosom friend in the distance. Although I don't know, I have a desire to talk.

I hope I am your classmate, preferably a good buddy who sleeps with you, and I am infected by you every day (of course, I have to be reborn as a boy in my next life) ",

She also said,

"In short, I hope you continue to be a good person, no matter what.

Because you seem to live the life I envy. "

You suddenly understand what Mr. Gao Shengyuan said,

Be a loving person in this fickle world, and you have lived into a poem.

04.

On September 22nd, 20021year, the internship was coming to an end, and you published an article "To Tongheng" on the official account of WeChat.

You turned melancholy into wine and drank the whole Mid-Autumn Festival.

You said you wanted to write an article that everyone would remember,

You know, this may be your last chance.

You wrote in "They graduated, we still have one year":

"For the future, I always seem to have a picture in my mind, but all kinds of uncertainties also confuse me."

When you are most anxious, you write a long list of words, which ends with:

"Even if life has 10,000 known appearances, I will explore the first possibility 10 1."

You will think of Robert Frost's poem The Road Not Taken,

"Maybe many years later, somewhere, I will sigh softly and look back:

The two roads diverged in the forest, so I chose the less traveled one.

From then on, it decided my life path. "

This is pure luck. At the most confused moment, you were lucky enough to meet Mr. Yin and get some advice.

"See yourself, see the world, see all beings", and you will gradually see your direction.

When reading Tu Mu's Autumn Night, Gao Shengyuan said:

Those little lights seem to bring hope to a hopeless life.

Just like this, you wrote in "Love Letter to Life":

"Get ready for your heart to beat faster. I like winter.

Look at the clear spring in the mountains-embrace the wind and waves. "

But things didn't go as smoothly as expected, and I couldn't sleep for countless tossing and turning nights.

You wrote in "Pick One":

"On the night when the moon can't be seen, many people are caught in a lot of rain."

"I suspect it's really you who ventured so far" in "Two Dreams of Li Bai" is most in line with your mood at that time.

Is he really dead? Is he alive or dead in front of him? A long way to go!

I want to know his news, but I dare not hear his bad news. I was happy at first sight, but on second thought I was suspicious, which led to deep anxiety and fear.

Finally, you received a reply. You said, there are two poems that you want to say most:

For the ideal cherished in my heart, I will not regret it a thousand times.

There is a long way to go in Xiu Yuan, and I will go up and down.

05.

Dong Qing said in the second issue of the third season of Reader, "Will you love Ta for a long time?"

"the desire for love,

The pursuit of knowledge,

Irrepressible sympathy for human suffering,

They are three simple but strong feelings that dominate my life. "

I'm not going to write a year-end summary this year. Recently, Xi was closed due to the epidemic, so we can only spend the New Year in the dormitory. We don't have much mood and good state to sum up something.

But when I look back on this year, when those people, things and moments come to mind, I still have the urge to record them.

202 1 year, grateful for all the encounters.

Hug yourself, this year is really hard, but it's really worth it!

Please continue to explore in 2022.

Keeping love is a great thing!