Funny and choking poison chicken soup

If you want to buy a house in Beijing with a monthly salary of 10 thousand, you might as well set a small goal first, for example, to live first

500 years.

2. A single male colleague washed a bunch of clothes at the weekend, saying that he was exhausted and really needed a wife. Married male compatriots replied: Wasting less is not enough?

Three.

20

/kloc-at the beginning of 0/8, I set myself the goal of saving 65,438+10,000 yuan this year. Up to now, I have calculated that it is still short.

1.5 million.

Today, my friend said he would change trains with me. After listening, I agreed. He handed me a bus card when I gave him the car keys.

5. University, walk towards it.

Ten dollars. My roommate insisted on celebrating, and eating hot pot cost me.

More than 300.

6. "Do you want to do shiatsu massage? Very comfortable. " "good!" After that, the Monkey King was crushed

Wuzhishan.

7. I am a woman. I went to learn driving today, but my brain couldn't react at the moment. I said angrily to the coach: there is a bone hanging on the steering wheel, and dogs drive better than you.

8. "I am ugly ~ ~ but I am very ............." "Come on. Don't say it if you are ugly!

9. "Browsers really care if they are the default browser, which is so annoying." "Girlfriend is more annoying, and I care if I am the only girlfriend." 10. American feminism: this job is not suitable for women? You discriminate against women! Women's Rights in China: You let a woman do this job? You discriminate against women!

My father took me to ride a bike and my foot got stuck in the wheel. My dad felt unable to pedal, so he stood up and pedal.

12. "When someone praises you for your good looks, how do you keep a low profile?" "What? Speak louder, I can't hear you! "

Thirteen. Our company

The team of 200 people booked a pool party in Thailand at the end of the month in advance. After the death of King Tai, entertainment and drinking were forbidden for one month. Colleagues said that it feels like this is a

Two hundred people attended the funeral.

14. I'm not good at pregnancy. I am very pregnant myself!

15. Honest man, stop dreaming of being a catcher. It is generally difficult to find an honest man to marry when you are tired of playing. The goddess is tired of playing and will only find a rich man to marry.

16. Every time I see someone spitting gum in the toilet, I feel extremely angry. It still tastes when chewed. Why are you vomiting?

17. I heard a mother-child conversation on the subway. Mom: You are so disobedient that mom doesn't want you. What would you do? Xiong Haizi: Let you be punished by law.

18. The electric car was stolen in the community. I angered the property: "What's the use of monitoring! ? "The security guard said weakly," Let ... let you have a last look at the electric car? "