Ask for the complete lines of the 20 13 Spring Festival Evening sketch (you are in trouble)

Security guard: "Born in a small mountain village, the city will work hard. Put on security clothes and hand over your youth to the door. I'm very proud. The place I am guarding is not an ordinary place, but an office building. People in this building will keep writing. Our leader said that during the Spring Festival, safety work is the most important. Anyone who enters the building must bring a card, and those without a card are not allowed to enter. If I go in, it will hurt me. "

Zhao Zong: "Hey, what's the matter with you? Why hasn't it arrived yet? "

Security guard: Sir.

Zhao Zong: I asked where have you been? Can't you hurry? Hey hey. .

Security guard: Sir.

Zhao Zong: Who should I call sir? What a beautiful expression.

Security guard: Ah, it's a woman. It is too complicated. Do you have a card?

Zhao: What brand is it?

Security guard: sign for entering the building.

Zhao: No. ..

Security guard: Sorry, you can't enter without a license.

Zhao Zong: Do I still use my card?

Security guard: Ah, our leader said that if it is an individual, you need to get a card.

Zhao Zong: Who are you talking about?

Security guard: I'm not saying you're not human. I mean, people without cards are not people. I mean, you have to bring a permit to enter this building.

Zhao Zong: You are new here today.

Security guard: "I'm not new here today, I'm new here yesterday." . . "

Zhao Zong: Do you know who I am?

Security guard: I don't know.

Zhao Zong: Zhao Zong is on the third floor of the building.

Security guard: Oh, Zhao Zong on the third floor. I don't know him.

Zhao Zong: I'll just go in 10 minutes, get something and leave.

Security guard: Sorry, you can't go in without a card.

Zhao Zong: "Oh, you are so stubborn.

Security guard: I am very flexible when you have a card.

Zhao Zong: I'm telling you, I'm bored today. "

Security guard: "I am very happy today. . . "

Zhao Zong: I just went out from here. Don't you see?

Security guard: I didn't see it.

Zhao Zong: I had a cup of coffee in the coffee shop opposite. You didn't see it.

Security guard: I didn't see it.

Zhao Zong: Then I went to the bathroom from the coffee shop. Don't you see?

Security guard: I didn't see it. I'm a security guard in the building, not in the bathroom.

Zhao Zong: You must have seen me coming out of the bathroom.

Security guard: I didn't see it. I'm fine. I can't keep staring at the bathroom.

Zhao Zong: Don't look at this or that. What do you see as a security guard?

Security guard: card.

Zhao Zong: You know the cards. Who do you think you are?

Zhao Zong: "Aren't you just a janitor?"

Security guard: "I am a janitor, I am proud."

Zhao Zong: Well, I will make you proud today.

Money giver: "Who's Big Sister? I am a man. "

Security guard: "You are a man, alas, a false mother. . . "

Money giver: "Hate" security guard: "Are you rich?"

Money giver: "Yes, I have money. My box is full of money. "

Security guard: "I tell you, you can win a corrupt official with this little money, but you can't win a clean security guard."

Money giver: "You are in trouble, you are in trouble."

Security guard: "Is this the slogan of your company?" Security guard: "You haven't seen that Zhao Zong. That man is very manic. "

Security guard: "I ask you Zhao Zong, do you owe money to migrant workers?" . You are in trouble, you are in trouble. "

Zhao Zong: "Do you have any money?"

I sent the money: "I brought it, it's all in my bag."

Zhao Zong said to the security guard, "Come here, I'll tell you something."

Security guard: "You don't have to bribe me. Anti-corruption starts with security. . . "

Zhao Zong: "I'm telling you, rumors and slander are legally responsible."

Security guard: "I'm not afraid. Let's see who goes first. Who do you think you are? Do you think you can pay your debts if you have money? Do you think you have the right to covet the country's money? Do you think that opening four hukou books can control the housing supply? Send you two words: it's over. " Security guard: "Auntie, how can you trust her? If she can give you money, I'll call her grandma. "

Zhao Zong: "Yes, please call grandma. . . "

Money giver: "Sister, you are a real man."

Security guard: "I'm in trouble, I'm in trouble." Zhao Zong: "Are you going to abscond?"

Security guard: "I have no money." Security guard: "What am I doing in your company?"

Zhao Zong: "Watch the warehouse."

Security guard: "oh, the security guard keeps it, and it is also leveled." . . "