My sad experience as a mistress for seven years

In those days when I first came to Hainan, I lived in a guest house on Heping South Road in Haikou. The accommodation fee of more than ten yuan a day, fast food in 2 yuan and a diploma from a secondary school made me feel that it was difficult to move in a strange city. In that room where three people live, I always drag my tired body back, always hiding in the bathroom less than 5 square meters and crying in front of the mirror.

it was hamming who took me in when I was desperate. At that time, he was in charge of recruitment in a trading company. According to the company's requirements, recruits must have a college diploma or above. But when I appeared in front of him, my unconfident and melancholy eyes touched him. He recruited me as a clerk in the company. He saved me rather than took me in. At the most fragile juncture of a girl's life, I am always grateful to the man who reached out and helped her.

Haiming is a native of Haikou and has been engaged in trade for many years. He is a tiger like me, but he is ten years older than me. He often laughs and says, you can be my daughter. I like the kind tone when he talks to me, and his gentle eyes always make me feel safe. In the city of Haikou, he is mature and wise, and gradually becomes a kind of dependence on my mind.

from gratitude to dependence, this process is quietly transformed. Until I learned that Hamming had an 8-year-old son, I still couldn't divert my infatuation with him. After work, he often takes me to the tea house near the company to have tea and chat. I tell him about my failed love without hesitation. I don't know why, but in front of him, I tell it easily.

But Hamming is a very strict man. Even though we almost stick together when going to work, he never touches me. The first intimate contact with him was my initiative. That day, I had a cold, so I went home from work early and waited for him to appear in the rental house. As soon as he entered the door, I put my arms around him from behind. I was wearing pajamas at that time, and his * * * was irresistibly ignited at that moment. Women talk in private (//sifanghua)

Afterwards, he had some regrets. After all, he and I are in the same company, and he is afraid that any flaw will affect his future, and even more afraid that I will pester him and cause harm to his family. And I feel that Hamming is really infatuated with my body. When I told him that I only wanted his present, we had a second time ... In fact, in the three years that I was his lover, our * * * were numbered, and he was always in a state of panic, but he could not get rid of the entanglement of desire.

hamming's lover and I lived in Haikou for three years. In these three years, Haikou is still a stranger to me, because my world exists only for him. At that time, what I thought of happiness was to stay in the rented house in Binhai New Village, dress myself up and wait for him to come and see. Later, for a while, Hamming always said that he had social intercourse and found many reasons for refusing me. In those days, I often stood by the window and watched his figure appear in the alley full of bougainvillea. Quietly, you can hear the sound of falling flowers, subtle and light, but so shocking. Like my youth, it slipped through my fingers.

but I can't see the erosion of youth. It was not until one night that I saw the scene in the TV series that I woke up from a dream. Haiming's wife found me, a bloated Hainan woman, and her shouting attracted many neighbors to watch. Amid the guidance, I was hurt to pieces. I cried and called Hamming, but he hung up again and again.

when everything fell silent, I almost hysterically opened the drawer and put a bottle of pills in my mouth.

but I didn't die. the landlord saved me. In the hospital, I finally saw Hamming's familiar face. He paid the medical expenses for me, then left 1 yuan money on my pillow and said with a straight face, Let's live somewhere else and don't come to me again.

Three years of youth have brought endless regrets and deep thoughts. I was 26 years old. I told myself that my ending has nothing to do with the role of the lover, but only with the man I love. At that time, I still thought that I loved the wrong person, not that I chose the wrong role.

I changed my job. Later, I worked as a sales girl in a real estate company. I met Xiao Qiang at a party in the company. He is another robbery in my life.