Funny sketch script for 5 people (1 male and 4 female)

Characters: Lao Wang, secretary, four interviewers (1 Xiaofeng, a middle-aged woman who suspects that her husband is having an affair, two illiterate college students MM, three female college students Yi Shui who are unemployed due to honesty problems, and four Nizi from rural areas).

Props: a table, a new type of water dispenser (a broken kettle is covered with a paper box that says "new automatic water dispenser")

Opening:

Secretary: (holding a folder in his hand, looking at the door from time to time, very impatient) It is said that the goals of the new four modernizations in 2 1 century are to install switches for the sun, railings for the Yellow River, reverse gears for airplanes, and tiles for the Great Wall. No, being a secretary has to help me emancipate my mind, dress up in fashion, work hard and reduce my salary. Look at my watch. ) What time is it now? The stingy boss hasn't come yet. The recruitment news has been sent out for a month, and today four people finally came ... (Suddenly I heard a voice and stopped)

Lao Wang: Teenagers eat vegetables, dress up books at school, dig dirt in the countryside, once led troops as soldiers, resumed factories, jumped ship and reopened. Today, who shoulders the heavy responsibility? (talking and walking, shirtless, wearing a suit and tie)

Secretary: This is early experience. Four applicants came today. They are all waiting in line outside. I have told them to introduce themselves for 3 to 5 minutes, and then you will ask questions (with a smile on your face).

Lao Wang: OK, let's get started (adjutant shelf)

Secretary: Please welcome number one.

Xiaofeng: I have been waiting outside for a long time. I heard that there is only one assistant manager missing today. I'm really nervous (dragging my clothes in). Hello, manager, I'm Xiaofeng No.1. I live in Mudanjiang this year, with 33 households, high school education, hard work and rich experience. I hope I can give you the opportunity to work for your company and create a better tomorrow.

Lao Wang: You used to work in that enterprise?

Xiaofeng: I got married at home after graduating from high school (bowing my head)

Lao Wang: Then why do you suddenly want to work again?

Xiaofeng: I want to be financially independent, because I suspect my husband is having an affair now (nervous, rubbing hands)

Lao Wang: Oh, do you have any basis?

Xiaofeng: Men have symptoms when they have an affair-the company works overtime every day, never touches housework, turns off their mobile phones when they get home, deletes them after sending text messages, snores loudly when sleeping, and often wears underwear backwards. If all three are doubtful, four can be diagnosed. (Xiao Feng's expression is high, the secretary smiles, and Lao Wang realizes something. )

Lao Wang: So what if you are diagnosed? Women should obey, and men are the sky (with a proud expression).

Xiaofeng: Now the society is different, and I also realize that marriage has followed the trend. Haven't you heard of this passage? Marriage is called surfing the Internet, bigamy is called double number card, extramarital affairs is called call transfer, couples are called mobile phones to surf the Internet, divorce is called pin number, shutdown is called stop number protection, remarriage is called double machine, female remarriage is called transfer, and male remarriage is called replacement card ... (More and more I heard Lao Wang's cough stop, and I noticed that I was carried away and regretted it. Lao Wang motioned to the secretary)

Secretary: OK, go back and wait for the notice. Next (summer)

Lao Wang: (Looking at Xiao Feng, talking to himself) Although I have never practiced martial arts since I was a child, I still feel like a character. I didn't expect big brother to get help. Teenagers have a secret crush on the object, and they dream of getting a wife. They are most afraid of being seen in the street. The child calls me uncle (sighs).

MM (dressed in fashion, walking up in high spirits) Hello, manager (winking at Lao Wang) I just graduated from college. I love life and respect leaders. Today, I want to apply for the position of assistant manager (smile).

Lao Wang: What's your major? (Kind attitude, looking MM up and down)

MM: I slept in Shanghai all night, and I was crazy about fighting terrorism. The legend is tireless. I sent short messages to the plenary session in arrears, smoked and rubbed hemp, didn't drink two bottles of white wine, and skipped classes in groups. Long live college life. (Raise your hand and clench your fist) If you want to ask a major, all of the above will do.

Lao Wang: Yeah. Does this mean that you know nothing about English 4 or English 2?

MM: That's not right. What we are advocating now is quality education. In 2008 China Olympic Games, I couldn't speak English. That's not feasible. Even when taking the bus, the conductor shouted (voice changed) that in order to support the Olympic Games, our car group launched an English popularization activity. Obviously, it is an English level certificate, and it is below Band 4. Please change to another vehicle.

Lao Wang: You didn't get off?

I didn't want to get off, but I was driven away. (Expression of disapproval) Ability is much more important than certificate now. To test your English, read this three times in a row. Take out a piece of paper, the secretary shows it to the audience and gives it to Lao Wang. )

Lao Wang: peace _ _ war _ _-find peace _ war _ find peace _ war _ find (the secretary laughs badly, and Lao Wang realizes that he has been cheated and stares at MM). I've never seen such a poor college student as you. Resist (stare away).

MM: That's because you haven't seen the world. I am an excellent student. I have a classmate who won money for the first time, his eyes were red, his food was tasteless, his limbs were weak, his property was barren, his six relatives were hard to recognize, he was so angry that he was in debt in all directions, and he was deeply mired in a quagmire, a hundred percent disaster, haha (complacent).

Lao Wang: I tell you, I traveled from south to north, ran over my leg on the train track, drank the water from the Yangtze River and the Yellow River, and kissed a fool. Who am I afraid of when the east wind blows and the drums beat? Don't argue with me about this (cutting my clothes and tie). You can go back (close your eyes angrily, MM below).

Secretary: Next.

Num: (Foreign trade is plain, clothes are plain) Hello, manager. My name is Num. I got a job in the city. I have many years of work experience and I am very serious and responsible. I hope to give me a chance to prove myself.

Lao Wang: (looking down at your resume) Your resume says that you were fired. Why?

Num: My hometown is poor and backward. There is a saying that dressing depends on spinning, getting rich depends on grabbing, getting married depends on thinking, communication depends on shouting, and public security depends on dogs. After graduating from college, I didn't choose to stay in the county, but returned to my hometown factory to contribute my strength. But at work, I was fired because of my efforts, and I got mixed up with Lucy smoothly. I was accused of doing my duty, but my official position remained unchanged. Fired for opposing the purchase of inferior materials (very emotional, wiping tears)

Lao Wang: Well (nodding), go back and wait for news. (Xiao politely) This man is very nice, but you can't use him, otherwise I'm afraid you can't escape the tax. Unfortunately (shaking his head and sighing)

Secretary: Next (no response), next (no response), next (high voice) (Nizi dressed up as a country girl, while walking in, she arranged her braids and got some saliva to stroke her short hair. Lala laughs her head off in a corner, and Lao Wang is a little fidgety)

Lao Wang: Give me that glass of water (with an impatient face, his legs crossed, his right finger kept bouncing on the table, and the secretary curled his mouth and walked to the water cooler)

Connie: Ah, this office is really magnificent. It's a little strange looking at the table and the ground. (Pointing at the water dispenser, Lao Wang suddenly remembered something. He stood up and blocked the water dispenser until the secretary came back to put down the water. Lao Wang took a sip)

Secretary: Please introduce yourself first.

Nizi: People call me Nizi, a native of Tunzi, Henan. She did not graduate from junior high school. She has been in the city for half a year. When she saw the recruitment information, she was doomed to meet me thousands of miles away. Hehe (laughs) I work hard. (The tone is Chen Jiao, arms crossed, swinging from side to side. If the assistant manager lets me be fooled, the village will have a good face. I'm not married (bowing my head and fiddling with my hair)

Lao Wang: (I want to laugh, the secretary laughs) What do you think is your advantage? (sarcastic tone)

Steve: I think I can do it. Our village chief said that I was the most beautiful in our village and had been rubbed. My mother said that I could find a handsome husband in the future. I'm never picky about food. I eat while cooking. For better or worse, I'm full when the meal is ready. Father said I could please my boss (crossing my hands and swinging from side to side).

Lao Wang: Well, all right, I already know your conditions. Go back and wait for the notice.

Nizi: You must hire me, you must hire me. My mother made me aspire to be at the age of zero and make progress every day at the age of one. I have 20 lofty ideals, 30 basic orientations, 40 are popular everywhere, 50 work hard, go back to my hometown at the age of 60, play mahjong at the age of 70, bask in the sun at the age of 80, lie in bed at the age of 90, and hang a hundred on the wall. Didn't a celebrity say that a thief was ambitious?

Lao Wang: You are very interesting and simple.

Nizi: But I know everything.

Lao Wang: Oh? What is pride?

Nizi: Niubai

Lao Wang: What is modesty?

Nizi: Pretend.

Lao Wang: What is thrift?

Nizi: Choose.

Lao Wang (winking and nodding) What is dedication?

Nizi: Silly.

Lao Wang (stands up excitedly, and Steve is excited) What is cleverness?

Nizi: Please invite me.

(Lao Wang Nizi reaches out and shakes hands at the same time) Finally found a bosom friend.

Secretary: You, you ... (pointing to them)

Lao Wang: (Sit down quickly and pretend to be calm) Just use her. From today, you will be the assistant manager.

Steve: Oh, not yet.

Secretary: But the manager, she …

Lao Wang: I'm the manager. I said she can, he can't, I said you can't, and neither can you. Hmm? (Wei Shi)

Nizi: I can't accept it (Lao Wang Nizi smiles at each other)

Lao Wang: Go and get her work clothes (Nizi is looking forward to it, but the work clothes are amazing).

Nizi: What is this?

Secretary: apron

Nizi: Huh? Is this what you use to make work clothes?

Lao Wang: I forgot to tell you, we are looking for an assistant manager and three employees in Daban porridge shop. I am the manager, he is an accountant and secretary, and you are the assistant manager. You have a lot of authority, and the rest of the right to work belongs to you, haha.

Nizi: It turns out that the most painful thing in this world is not to say goodbye to life and death, but to go into a big porridge shop by mistake and make me dizzy.