Quotes for movie sketches

Behind the scenes: Host Ma, have you seen our director? What director? Directed by Zhu Shimao. Director Zhu. have no idea. Look for it over there and see if there is one there, over there.

Zhu Shimao: Comrade Director, please note that the weather is relatively cold today and the film is being filmed at minus 30 degrees. Therefore, all our departments must seize the time to complete all preparations before the actors arrive. Get ready. As soon as the actors arrive, we will start shooting immediately. Director, you guys are starting to take action. The weather is cold. You can exercise. Director, yes, yes, yes, the costumes, open all the boxes (

Chen Peisi walked out)

Chen Peisi: (to Zhu Shimao) Director Zhu Shimao: The props are all displayed

Chen Peisi: Director Zhu Shimao

Zhu Shimao: Looks familiar

Chen Peisi: Looks familiar Have you forgotten that on this day last year, I shot a scene in your film where I ate a bucket of noodles or you sent me to the hospital for rescue? You must have forgotten

Zhu Shimao: (sudden realization) Chen Chen Xiaoer I haven’t seen you in almost a year. How is your health?

Chen Peisi: My body is basically back to health now, so I haven’t left any sequelae, right? It’s just that when it rains on this cloudy day, I still have a little stomachache.

Zhu Shimao: It’s cloudy. What is the name of rheumatic stomach?

Chen Peisi: Right for rheumatic joints and stomach

Zhu Shimao: (Worry) It’s cold today. Go back and rest quickly. Chen Peisi: I have something to do with you. Zhu Shimao : Go back and take a rest

Chen Peisi: Director

Zhu Shimao: Go back and take a rest (to the back) Get ready quickly. The dramaturg quickly sends someone to find the actors

Chen Peisi: Go, go and have a look, director

Zhu Shimao: I said you have posted forty advertisements for actors, have you posted them? If they are posted, won’t there be an actor to sign up?

Chen Peisi: Yes, where is it? The director is here. Do you think this is a recruitment advertisement? (Take out a large piece of paper) You see it says (pointing to the words on the paper) I have good facial features and a strong body. I think I am They are all qualified, so I will try my luck today

Zhu Shimao: I told you that it was because of you last year that I still lacked a scene in the film

Chen Peisi: (guilty) I know I feel very sorry for you, but it won’t happen this year. This year, my main practice is to eat noodles. Director, let me tell you, how many buckets should I eat today? If you say too much, you dare not say that within three buckets, I will be fine. Director

Zhu Shimao: I told you not to eat noodles this year

Chen Peisi: No more

Zhu Shimao: This year we mainly want to be in good health

Chen Peisi: (Confidence) I am strong, you think I am okay

Zhu Shimao: No, no, I want someone who is not afraid of the cold

Chen Peisi: I am anti-freeze, Director, I am in the hospital I have been exercising non-stop. Director, if you can't do it, tell me what to do. How about I give you a martial arts lesson? You can see if my basic skills are solid or not. I'll give you a fork. Director, come over here and take a look. (Take off your shoes.) Put it on the neck) Look, director, what do you think, director, if you think I can carry it up,

Zhu Shimao: (Surprise) He has really practiced well, okay, what do you think? Drama manager, is there a second actor to sign up?

Chen Peisi: No chance

Zhu Shimao: Why

Chen Peisi: All forty job advertisements were accepted I'll take it off, please promise me, Director, I'm telling you, I'm looking forward to this day every day, Director, you know how much I long to be a movie actor, but you know I'm not good

Zhu Shimao : Okay, I told you I’ll use you again this year

Chen Peisi: (Surprise) Real director

Zhu Shimao: We can’t make a deal without fighting

Chen Peisi: Yes

Zhu Shimao: It's all up to you now

Chen Peisi: No problem director

Zhu Shimao: OK, I'll tell you about us This play reflects the great changes in the face of our rural areas in recent years. The changes in the countryside are so great that farmers have bought everything they have in their homes

Chen Peisi: (stealing the talk) Color TV

What do you mean you don’t have a video recorder, a sewing machine, a bicycle, a watch, an old hen, etc. There are professional chicken farmers at home. He also bought a car, a tractor, a big tractor, a small tractor, a walking tractor, riding a motorcycle into the fields, and some of them have that majestic beep.

Zhu Shimao: (angry) What are you beeping? You are beeping. You said it was me. Chen Peisi: I said it, not you, right? Zhu Shimao: Is this a good situation? You all know about it. I won’t tell you if you know it. Let me tell you about this play. Please tell me about this script. In this script, it mainly describes a middle-aged farmer.

Chen Peisi: The middle-aged farmer is Qiao, let me tell you. I am exactly thirty years old this year and have a rural life. You see, my grandfather is a farmer and my father is half a farmer. You know, of course I am a descendant of farmers, right? Although I stayed in the hospital for a year, I was still in the hospital. Regarding the situation in rural areas, I am particularly concerned about the situation in the countryside. Director, please tell me, no, no, director, please don’t be angry. I’d better listen to you. I’m done, listen to you. Is this right? Yes, yes, this, right, right, right, right? Yes yes

Zhu Shimao: (angry) What is it? Yes, I don’t know what it is. You don’t know where I just talked about. There is a middle-aged farmer

Chen Peisi: I don’t know what it is. I am exactly thirty this year and I know this. You see, my grandfather is a farmer and my father

Zhu Shimao: (angry) Can you shut up?

Chen Peisi: I'm sorry, the director still listens to you

Zhu Shimao: This middle-aged farmer came back from the county town with a lot of money after selling surplus grain. After meeting the villagers, he happily said something. Knowing that, in fact, this play is also very interesting. It is simply a very happy emotion for it

Chen Peisi: This is no problem, the director is no problem, I tell you, isn’t it just happy? Yes, I have this characteristic

Zhu Shimao : What are the characteristics

Chen Peisi: I am happy when I see money. Holding the banknotes in my hand one-five-one-fifteen-twenty-five-thirty

Zhu Shimao: (signaling to stop) ) Okay, okay

Chen Peisi: Forty-five-fifty

Zhu Shimao: Okay, okay, no problem, just listen to me, Wang Laowu

Chen Peisi: ( Doubtful) It’s not you. Didn’t your last name change?

Zhu Shimao: (incomprehensible) What changed your name?

Chen Peisi: Isn’t your name Zhu Shimao?

Zhu Shimao: That’s what I said This is the line

Chen Peisi: I said the line

Zhu Shimao: Yes, folks, you said I, Wang Laowu, have never seen so much money, I have nothing to say.

Chen Peisi: Director of what?

Zhu Shimao: If you don’t have anything to say, just come to my house and have a drink

Chen Peisi: (posing) Let’s have a drink and watch. How's this figure?

Zhu Shimao: Come and do it again

Chen Peisi: Start from the beginning (raise your left hand first, then remember it's your right hand) It's this finger you said (point to the audience) Someone from the country) Folks, I am Wang Laowu

Zhu Shimao: (signaling to stop) Stop, I don’t want you to say it

Chen Peisi: You don’t want me to say it (leave, Zhu Shimao sees this) , indicating to let him come back)

Zhu Shimao: Come on, come on

Chen Peisi: I asked you to say it again (pointing to a person in the audience) Xiang

Zhu Shimao: I don’t want you to say it

Chen Peisi: Then I won’t say it

Zhu Shimao: I don’t want you to say these two words

Chen Peisi : Right, I didn’t say a word

Zhu Shimao: Why are you so stupid?

Chen Peisi: I’m not stupid

Zhu Shimao: You Why aren’t you stupid?

Chen Peisi: I’m not stupid

Zhu Shimao: You’re not stupid, even if you say you don’t say it, you can’t figure it out

Chen Peisi: (Innocent ) I know very well

Zhu Shimao: (angry) What do you know

Chen Peisi: If you ask me to say it, I will say it, but if you don’t let me say it, I won’t say it

< p>Zhu Shimao: I said this is what you said

Hey, you won’t say it

Chen Peisi: I won’t say it...

Zhu Shimao: Yes, you said it’s the folks at the back, I, Wang Laowu, etc. still want you to say it< /p>

Chen Peisi: Yes, I just told you that we are the king from you folks

Zhu Shimao: Stop, stop, you said you must not say it

Chen Peisi: (I am confused) Answer) Director, do you want me to say it or not?

Zhu Shimao: Look at mine. I’ll look at yours. Are you happy to see the folks? I’m glad you said folks... (Wrong)

Chen Peisi: That’s what I said

Zhu Shimao: I’ve made you so angry, let me give you a sign

Chen Peisi : You gestured and said

Zhu Shimao: You looked at you and said (gesticulated to remove these two words) No more

Chen Peisi: (Looked in the direction Zhu Shimao removed)

p>

Zhu Shimao: Folks, I, Wang Laowu, etc. will start from the folks down the line

Chen Peisi: (stupefied for a moment) I will understand when you make such a gesture, is this the right thing to do? Did you say you cut it off like a piece of meat?

Zhu Shimao: That's right

Chen Peisi: Isn't it clear when you gesture like this? You will say you later Don’t tell me whether you want me to tell you or not

Zhu Shimao: This is still mine

Chen Peisi: Of course

Zhu Shimao: Take it seriously. Come on, come on, do it again

Chen Peisi: It’s just a few lines, so it won’t matter what happens to my body

Zhu Shimao: Then it’s easy to change clothes

Chen Peisi: Do you think there are farmers who wear suits now? Can you please show me what kind of suit is suitable?

Zhu Shimao: Let me tell you about my play, it is a play in the mountains

< p>Chen Peisi: The drama in the mountainous area is interesting

Zhu Shimao: (to the audience) Prepare that vest for him

Chen Peisi: Director, what do you mean by preparation< /p>

Zhu Shimao: Vest

Chen Peisi: Duck Down Vest

Zhu Shimao: What kind of duck vest

Chen Peisi: Leather Vest

Zhu Shimao: No

Chen Peisi: A woolen vest is okay

Zhu Shimao: What kind of woolen vest

Chen Peisi: What kind of vest is that?

Zhu Shimao : It’s just the vest for playing basketball

Chen Peisi: Isn’t it the vest for playing basketball? It’s not much different from that shirtless one. Director, look at it, it’s snowing heavily outside and it’s minus 30 degrees. Please let me Dress

Zhu Shimao: Let me tell you, my play is a summer play

Chen Peisi: Let’s film it in the summer

Zhu Shimao: It’s a rush It will be released during the Spring Festival

Chen Peisi: You can’t let me wear a vest and stand in the snow. You said you are, you also know that my body is a joint and stomach, right?

Zhu Shimao: (to the audience) Let’s give him a small coat

Chen Peisi: Adding a small coat is too much, don’t you think?

Zhu Shimao: He If your health is not good, then why don’t we change the actor for this (to the audience) stage manager?

Chen Peisi: No, no, director, director, can’t change the actor, then forget it, I’ll stick to it, director, okay?

Zhu Shimao: If you can persist, you can change clothes easily

Chen Peisi: Director is good, but I can’t hold on for a while. We need to hurry up

Zhu Shimao: (impatient) hurry up

p>

Chen Peisi: Then let’s not have bowl after bowl like last year...

Zhu Shimao: Okay, ok (to the audience), all departments should pay attention, now the actors have been decided We remind the photographers to pay attention to several issues. We film based on the actor’s characteristics. This actor has a characteristic: his nose is relatively large. According to this characteristic, the nose must not be lit. There is also another characteristic: this actor’s eyes are small. When filming, This shot needs to be pushed from a medium shot to a close shot and finally a close-up to express his emotions and express his innermost feelings. This actor’s image is not very good-looking. You need to make it more beautiful.

Chen

Pace: The director brought the director’s money that day

Zhu Shimao: (saw the towel on Chen Peisi’s head) The towel is not the right towel

Chen Peisi: (twirled the towel half a turn) Want it Not like that

Zhu Shimao: No, no, no

Chen Peisi: (turns the towel half a circle again) Come back

Zhu Shimao: You have to take it off when it comes back

p>

Chen Peisi: It would be warmer if you put it on your head here

Zhu Shimao: You can keep it here to wipe off sweat

Chen Peisi: Wipe Wipe the sweat, I’m still the director

Zhu Shimao: Okay, our departments have paid attention. The actors have arrived. Let’s go through the play and prepare to start

Chen Peisi: It’s filmed

Zhu Shimao: Come on now

Chen Peisi: It’s not that I can’t bear the director’s formality. Folks, I, Wang Laowu, have never seen so much money in my half life. Folks, one, five, ten. Fifteen, twenty-twenty-five, all come to my house tonight

Zhu Shimao: Wait a minute, nothing to say

Chen Peisi: One more sentence (continue acting) all come to my house

Zhu Shimao: Nothing to say

Chen Peisi: That’s it. Come to my house for a drink

Zhu Shimao: Nothing to say

Chen Peisi: I have nothing to say

Zhu Shimao: I have nothing to say, have you said it?

Chen Peisi: I have nothing to say, so what should I say?

Zhu Shimao: There is nothing to say in this line about you

Chen Peisi: Yes

Zhu Shimao: Of course there is

Chen Peisi : Director, look at this coldness. I was so nervous that I forgot about the director

Zhu Shimao: This sentence illustrates the character of this farmer. You must say something about this simple and honest character who has nothing to say. Well

Chen Peisi: Yes

Zhu Shimao: But it’s almost okay, but your performance is still better than when you were eating noodles

Chen Peisi: Thank you Thank you for the director's cultivation. Then I will go back and change clothes

Zhu Shimao: Let's officially shoot

Chen Peisi: (Surprised) The official shooting was just now

Zhu Shimao: I just tried it once

Chen Peisi: Can I try it again and again in such a cold day

Zhu Shimao: I told you that our film is tight

Chen Peisi: There are enough co-writers, right?

Zhu Shimao: Why is there so much nonsense? All departments should pay attention to the official filming and be ready

Chen Peisi: Director, I will move quickly

Zhu Shimao: Now ready for the official shooting (Zhu Shimao was about to signal the start, Chen Peisi sneezed) I said what about you (Chen Peisi sneezed again)

Chen Peisi: Can you blame me? Can you blame me, the director?

Zhu Shimao: Are you okay? (Sneeze) Am I okay?

Chen Peisi: If you are okay, let’s shoot quickly

Zhu Shimao: I (sneeze) have been fine for a long time

Chen Peisi: Let’s shoot quickly

Zhu Shimao: The official filming preparations have begun

Chen Peisi: (Always blowing his nose) Folks, please be happy. I, Wang Laowu, don’t cry. I have lived for most of my life.

Zhu Shimao: Stop, I said, what are you doing? What are you doing? You see what you are doing

Chen Peisi: Can you blame me? It's -30 degrees below zero. I'm standing here in a singlet. Look, look at the snot. It's involuntarily flowing down. Look, isn't it? You're not. Look, all of this (Zhu Shimao worked on the script. ) Director, I’m sorry

Zhu Shimao: Blow your nose, blow your nose

Chen Peisi: It’s not my fault. Thank you, director

Zhu Shimao: Come and stand ready for the official filming. Don't tremble

Chen Peisi: Who is shaking? Look, you are not shaking. What's wrong?

Zhu Shimao: I'm just a little trembling. Why are you trembling?

Chen Peisi: You said Why am I trembling? Isn’t he Wang Laowu who went back to the village?

Zhu Shimao: Yes

Chen Peisi: Didn’t he meet the villagers when he returned to the village? Xiaofeng Yi

It's cool to blow him, isn't it?

Zhu Shimao: Why is it wrong? You should feel hot all over here

Chen Peisi: I feel hot all over

Zhu Shimao: You I think you ran back to the village from the county seat for more than 20 miles

Chen Peisi: That’s what happened

Zhu Shimao: You were sweating profusely from running

>

Chen Peisi: I'm sweating profusely. Can you wait for me to run twenty miles and come back?

Zhu Shimao: (stopping Chen Peisi) There are so many people waiting for you to run twenty miles.

Chen Peisi: What should we do?

Zhu Shimao: What do you want me to do? Just design whatever action you want

Chen Peisi: I have designed the action and you have the director. Look at this. How about fanning yourself

Zhu Shimao: Okay

Chen Peisi: Let me wipe the sweat with a towel

Zhu Shimao: Yes, you should say it while wiping

Chen Peisi: Folks, I, Wang Laowu, am sweating profusely

Zhu Shimao: Well, please, stop, I said there should be sweat on your face

Chen Peisi: Where did I get this sweat? Director, you can’t really make things difficult for me

Zhu Shimao: It doesn’t matter, I have a way.

Chen Peisi: It can make my face full It’s sweat

Zhu Shimao: You should be sweating all over your body

Chen Peisi: (Surprise) What do you say?

Zhu Shimao: Put on makeup and bring him a basin of cold water Come up (someone gave him a basin of water below, which is actually a basin)

Chen Peisi: No Director

Zhu Shimao: Let me tell you

Chen Peisi: No

Zhu Shimao: You have to endure all kinds of hardships when making a movie

Chen Peisi: No, we can’t stand this hardship

Zhu Shimao: Come on

Chen Peisi: It’s not the director. I have a stomach problem. Director, what are you doing? Director, what are you doing? This is going to kill someone. Director (Zhu Shimao made a gesture of pouring water on Chen Peisi’s head)

Zhu Shimao: Okay, come around. (To the audience) Well, now the actors are filming at 30 degrees below zero, and they have water poured on them, so all our departments must pay attention and strive to film it in one go

Chen Peisi: Okay Can't delay any more, director, let's shoot as soon as possible

Zhu Shimao: Official filming preparations have begun

Chen Peisi: Say

Zhu Shimao: I don't want you to say

Chen Peisi: I don’t want you to tell me

Zhu Shimao: Tell me, folks

Chen Peisi: Folks

Zhu Shimao: I am Wang Laowu Speak out your fever

Chen Peisi: I have a fever

Zhu Shimao: What are you talking about?

Chen Peisi: I am sweating profusely. Yes (Fell to the right, Zhu Shimao stopped him) I was sweating profusely (Falled to the left, Zhu Shimao stopped him) My whole body was hot (Falled backward, Zhu Shimao stopped him) I said I was sweating all over

Zhu Shimao: What did you do to you (Chen Peisi was "frozen")? You were frozen in this scene (beating Chen Peisi, but there was no response). The drama staff rushed to the ambulance. You, you, I said you were not in good health. You must You said, okay, you, you still need me to take you to the hospital