Ask for a sketch script about Cixi and the New Deal in the late Qing Dynasty, about 10 minutes, 5 to 8 words, urgently.

Participants: Empress Dowager Cixi's Queen Beauty 1, 2 (cross-dressing), 3, 4 narration.

Narrator: The story to be told today happened a long time ago. There are gorgeous emperors and gentle and dignified beauties in the story. The name of the story is "The Emperor Choose a Concubine".

The opening song sounded and Cixi joined the ranks of eunuchs.

Cixi (fanning her fan and looking around): It's really lively today. So many people came to see the emperor choose a concubine?

Audience: Yes.

Cixi: What about this emperor? What time is it now? Traffic jam again, right?

Eunuch: Please be calm.

The eunuch helped Cixi sit down and ran to the stage to take out her mobile phone.

Eunuch: Hello?

Eunuch: Your Majesty, where is it?

Emperor: Nanhongmen was blocked.

Eunuch: Is the South Red Gate blocked? Can you come?

Emperor: Never mind. I'll run. I'll be right there.

Eunuch: Hurry up, Lafayette is in a hurry.

The eunuch put away his mobile phone and saluted Lafayette.

Eunuch: Go back to Lafayette. The emperor blocked it with the South Hong Gate.

Cixi: Nanhongmen can be blocked. It's time for traffic control in the Forbidden City.

The music began, and the background sound was "The Emperor is coming". The emperor waved in, followed by bodyguards.

Emperor: Greetings to Lafayette!

Cixi: Stand up.

Emperor: Thank you, Lafayette.

Eunuch: Report to the Emperor and Empress Dowager that all the beauties are ready. Can we get started?

Cixi: Let's begin.

Emperor: Serve.

Eunuch: The first concubine selection ceremony of Qingyundian Central Health Center begins now.

Narrator: The first beauty, the sharp daughter of Urnala, comes from Zhengbaiqi, Mongolia. She is gentle as water, virtuous and kind, as quiet as a virgin and as moving as a rabbit.

Beauty 1 Twist (dancer) to the music and stand in the center of the stage.

Beauty 1: I am a killer who has been wandering the Jianghu for many years. After living in a pool of blood for 20 years, I understand a truth: Jianghu is dangerous, so if you can't leave, you have to leave! So now, I plan to find a stable job. On the same day, I saw the recruitment notice of the emperor choosing a concubine on the 58-city network. Hum, with me here, those little crazy women in the harem won't be killed! I have a secret weapon here. (Unfolding a pair of blue underwear) Look, do you know what this is? Invincible underpants, want to know her function? I won't tell you!

Beauty 1 turned to salute in front of the emperor, and suddenly presented blue shorts, which startled the emperor.

Beauty 1: Your Majesty! This is dedicated to you!

The emperor took blue shorts and studied them over and over again.

Beauty 1: With it, none of those little witches in the harem can get close to you except me. Your Majesty, let me protect you!

The emperor threw the blue shorts behind him.

Emperor: No, I have bodyguards.

Beauty 1: I am better than a bodyguard. I hid the weapon.

The emperor motioned the guards behind him to step down.

Emperor: Gesture!

Beauty 1 settled with the bodyguard. The background music suddenly changed from nervous to "two little bees", and the beauty 1 and the bodyguard guessed fists. In the end, the beauty was pushed down by the bodyguard. The bodyguard posed in the direction where the beauty 1 disappeared and returned to his position.

The emperor held the hand of the bodyguard with tears in his eyes.

Emperor: Thank you, brother. If I marry that witch, I will die.

Eunuch: Next.

Narrator: The second beauty is a beauty from South Korea, Nora's little moon. She is wearing a yellow flag. She is as quiet as a beautiful flower and as gentle as a willow.

Music "Dae Jang Geum", Beauty 2 is good at dancing with long sleeves.

Beauty 2: Ah, you are so sad! Little girl, I am 18 this year, and I swear to bring down the emperor. Am I beautiful today? Damn, I won't leave you. I'm going to see the emperor.

Beauty 2: Hello, Emperor, Empress Dowager.

Emperor: Where are you from?

Beauty 2: I'm Korean, Your Majesty. This is our specialty.

Beauty 2 presents bananas in turn.

Emperor: Well, the specialty is good. Let me test your IQ next.

Man 2: Your Majesty, please take the exam. I was born with only one shortcoming.

Everyone: What is it?

Beauty 2: IQ is too high

Guard: Please listen to the topic-the carriage fell off a cliff, and everyone on board was injured, but Father Zhao was safe and sound. Why?

Beauty 2: Is he wearing a seat belt?

Bodyguard: Because Father Zhao is not in the car.

Bodyguard: Please listen to the second question-there will be a holiday soon, but there is only one pig and one donkey in the farmer's house. Kill pigs or donkeys?

Beauty 2: Slaughter the donkey, of course.

Bodyguard: So is the pig.

Bodyguard: Please listen to the third question-a pig and a penguin are at a temperature of tens of degrees below zero. The pig is not dead, but the penguin is dead. Why?

Beauty 2: I don't know.

Bodyguard: Neither can a pig.

Emperor: I don't even know. Come back when you go back and fix your original problem.

Beauty 2 stomped away.

Eunuch: Next, hurry up.

Narrator: The third beauty, Sister Wu Yashi Furong, is from Zhenglanqi, with lively personality and exquisite singing and dancing. Life motto is kill panda, I am a national treasure!

Beauty 3 dances to the emperor.

Beauty 3: Handsome, I like you very much. My biggest dream is to let you dance with me, can you?

Emperor (said modestly): I am not a casual person. I am not a casual person.

Cixi waved her hand in agreement.

Cixi: Go ahead.

The Emperor and Beauty 3 came to the center of the stage.

Beauty 3: Are you ready, handsome boy? music

After jumping twice, Beauty 3 stumbled to the ground, and the emperor stood at a loss. Beauty 3, get up and help your waist.

Beauty 3: Why are you so heavy? You ate so much that you almost broke my waist.

Beauty 3: Forget it if you can't dance well. Can you play mahjong?

Emperor: My dog's name is Mahjong.

Beauty 3: Can you sing K songs?

Emperor: (singing) After several decades, we will meet again, send them to the crematorium and burn them all to ashes. You are a pile, I am a pile, and no one knows anyone. They will all be sent to the countryside to make fertilizer.

Beauty 3: Can't you be noble?

Emperor: (singing) I am a wolf from the north.

Beauty 3: Stop, stop, stop! Others sing for money, and you sing for your life! If you can't dance, who will accompany me to the party? ? If you can't play mahjong, who will help me win the money? You can't sing, who will have a concert with me? Why is the gap between people so big? Let me give you a few words. The east is not bright and the west is bright. What do you like?

Ren Mei 3 Xia

The emperor ran to Cixi in tears.

Emperor: Mom, she bullied me.

Cixi: Good boy, and, and. Announce!

Eunuch: Xuanmeiren No.4.

Beauty 4 debut

Narrator: The fourth beauty, Tong Jiashi, is the niece of Empress Dowager Cixi. She's ice smart and feels good about herself. Her favorite food is lollipops.

Beauty 4: Hello, nice to meet you. Do you think we should speak English or Chinese?

The emperor looked puzzled at Empress Dowager Cixi and her bodyguards.

Bodyguard: Well, you see, we are proficient in English, French, Spanish, Portuguese, Dutch, Finnish and Australian.

Beauty 4: Oh, let's speak our mother tongue. Nice to meet you!

Beauty 4 shakes hands with the emperor

Beauty 4: Introduce yourself first. My name is Guan Yue, and I'm 28 years old. The biggest regret in life is that I want to fall in love early, but it's too late ... but my experience is still very rich. Think of that year, I punched Nanshan nursing home and kicked Beihai kindergarten, all of which were put down below one meter. I stamped my foot in the morgue. "Stand up if you don't agree!" No one dares to breathe.

Emperor: Mother, close relatives get married, and it is easy to be stupid.

Cixi: Nonsense. Our family was ashamed to enjoy the moon, but we went to school and studied abroad. Shame on flowers, recite an ancient poem for my cousin.

Beauty 4: Rizhao incense burner produces purple smoke, and Li Bai comes to the bathroom. When Xiao Li flies a knife, Li Bai becomes a little eunuch.

Emperor: Good poem! Give you a lollipop!

Beauty 4: Ah, why are lollipops so big?

Emperor: (to the audience) This is iron. Go down and eat slowly.

Beauty 4

Eunuch: Report to the Queen Mother, all the beauties are finished. Everyone is waiting for a result. Can it be announced to everyone?

Cixi discussed with the emperor for a while and handed an envelope to the eunuch.

Eunuch: Thanks to Xianghe Funny TV Station, I announced that all the results of this Princess Selection Award were accepted.

The beauty screamed and ran to the emperor.

Emperor: Take it out and hit 50 boards each ~ ~ ~

Narrator: Since then, the emperor and his beautiful and clever concubines have lived happily together.

Please adopt

thank you