Urgent need for funny drama scripts about college students' psychological recruitment

Person: college student, chairman, secretary

Props: paper, pen, mobile phone

C: I graduated from college for three and a half years, and now I'm out for a living. I heard that Kim is looking for a foreman, and I have an interview every year. I can't miss this opportunity!

Don't be too shabby when going out. Take a limousine to pay for it. The traffic jam didn't move, so we had to walk for a mile and a half. It was a waste of fifty dollars. Hey, audience friends, I'm really exhausted. But fortunately, we finally arrived at this "human resources market".

(Looking around, I found many people)

C: Oh, my God, I don't know. If you know it, it's a recruitment, and if you don't know it, you can give it away as money for free.

(Squeeze into it desperately)

C: (Panting) Finally, it's coming in. With this squeezing method, the bread has turned into sausage. You said it was a big company, so why did you come to such a broken place to recruit people?

J: it's hard for the Jinshi group to start a business, and it's been five and a half years. The year before last, it went public, and now it's famous. Who expected the economic crisis to come so quickly?

The economic crisis is a foreign enemy, and the shortage of talents is urgent. The director will personally check the situation, so don't get involved!

C: yo, uncle.

J: who should I call uncle? Am I that old?

C: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'd like to ask where to interview for the application of this Kim Group.

J: I mean, you're such a great young man. You want to go to an interview without handing in your resume? Why don't you ask me when you will succeed the director?

C: I didn't think about it. I was afraid to ask you and you didn't know.

J: (angry) you … you … you … how do you say this? You know I'm ... < P > C: OK, OK, OK. Everyone is here for this job. Don't be coaxed in the nest before the fat is out of the pot. It's not easy to find a job these days. Look, I can't find a young man. Your age and qualifications are below the issue price. If you can't find a job, you are anxious and understand.

J: (Hold back!

C: (proudly) undergraduate course.

J: what university?

C: Tsinghua

J: (surprised)

C: A university where the campus is located.

J: What's its name?

C: Hey, the name is not worth mentioning. However, this university has a good geographical location. Among the two famous universities, it can really be said that it combines the aura of Tsinghua and the essence of Peking University. In short, the students will not be bad!

J: so what's your major?

C: (looking embarrassed) major? Let me see?

J: are you talking nonsense? What undergraduate? I can't even remember the name of my major.

C: I've seen this major name twice in my life. My father filled it out when I applied for a job. When I issued my diploma, it was filled out by the school. I think it's three or five years old. Do you remember it?

J: (in distress situation) this, what is this? Your major ...

C: Brother, you have asked me for a long time. What is your education?

J: ok. graduate student of Zhejiang university.

C: (surprised) really? It's said that 1, graduates and 999 graduates have been assigned high-tech units.

J: I'm the only one left.

C: Okay, okay, don't be complacent. The recruitment of employees by the Kim Group emphasizes ability rather than academic qualifications.

J: Do you have any working experience?

C: There are many.

J: Didn't you forget your major?

C: but I have strong self-development ability! The jobs I took part in were all beautiful and admired. They were a little worse than the chairman of the Kim Group.

J: Tell me, what do you do?

C: what do you look at me for?

J: where can you tell?

C: Look at your eyesight. I look like a literary and art worker in my appearance, figure and temperament! People say I'm an idol, but at first glance, I'm a strength. In fact, I'm an idol and a strength, with a combination of film, video and song.

J: Oh? So what's your acting experience?

C: I have participated in Super Man, Good Man, True Man, Dream Man, Dancer, Handsome Man, Avenue of Stars, strictly come dancing, Dance Forest Conference, which made me famous, danced with a new anchor, and I was impressed for the first time. I was always in the draft.

J: Which record company did you sign up with?

C: Unfortunately, I didn't make it. However, I also participated in several blockbusters. > Do you know?

J: blockbuster, why didn't you know?

C: It's a pity that the camera didn't get it. But it's not mainly about my acting skills. It's that I forgot to get on well with the cameraman. I'll have experience after filming. Shoot > Before, I gave red envelopes to the director, assistant director, camera, lighting, costumes, props, makeup and chores.

J: Appeared?

C: it's still not on.

J: why?

C: The buddies who died with me all gave more than me. But I'm not discouraged. Make persistent efforts. Life is about persistence. This year, there is another big movie about war. Guess what?

J: oh, > Well.

C: Clever.

J: How about this time?

C: half of my face is exposed this time.

J: why is it only half, and I haven't given enough red envelopes?

C: That's enough. The director arranged a scene with Hu Jun. Boy, his 1.9-meter-long head blocked more than half of me alive. My mother saw it on the Internet five or six times before she quickly told my dad that the big man's head with a dysentery scar behind him was our son. Well, fortunately, my hairstyle is unique!

J: Hey, don't talk about your education and experience. Even if you are lucky, the Kim Group can't find a jinx.

C: What are you talking about? Failure is the mother of success, which I call social skills.

J: Oh, that makes sense. In that case, I'll test you. Look, there's a young lady over there, with a resume.

C: I know. Isn't this an employee of the Kim Group? I can tell at a glance? How's it going?

J: Who asked you this? Her badge says that not illiterate people can see it.

C: It proves that my eyesight is good.

J: Don't interrupt. I mean, can you handle her? Ask her to give you the meeting place and phone number directly.

C: It's nothing!

(Go over and whisper to the young lady for a while, take out a pen and paper and let her write. Then trot back)

C: Done!

J: so soon?

C: Of course. I majored in picking up girls, making conversation with my minor and dating as a hobby for four years in college. So far, three girls have gone on a hunger strike for me, two have drunk for me and one has jumped off a building for me. So when I was in the draft, I called my stage name Girl Killer. Unfortunately, I took too many courses and spent too much time. I met Xiaohong when I went shopping with Xiaoli in the morning and made out with Lingling in the afternoon, and Fangfang called to stir it up.

C:NO PRBLOM. Look, I have my phone number and home address, plus my height, weight, birthday constellation, blood type hobby.

J: Why don't you even ask around?

C: at your age, why are you so old and not serious? Be subtle when you meet for the first time, okay? However, if you must, I'll ask. (I'm going to leave)

J: (pulls) I asked you to ask the location and contact number of the interview with the Kim Group. Don't you want to interview directly?

C: oops. why didn't you make it clear?

J: you didn't understand it yourself!

C: that's what I think when I meet a woman.

M: (running over with a phone in hand) Chairman, your phone. Shanghainese

C: (with a surprised face, I draw a stroke at the secretary and hit myself on the head)

J: My phone. (looking everywhere)

M: You forgot. Woman's voice? /(Glancing at the secretary, the secretary looks down) No, no, absolutely not./I'm working outside./Kiss, don't believe me. Where are there any wild women? /Absolutely at work? /Don't believe it? Ask my staff if you don't believe me/(look around and turn the phone to C)

C: Hello, boss. Happy New Year. I wish your old man good health, youth and beauty. Why do you eat so well?

J: Get to the point.

C: I'm working outside with Jin Dong. /Wild woman? Absolutely not./I just answered the phone in Shanghainese./This human resources market is crowded, so you must have misheard it./Eh, you must have misheard it./I'm sure that there is absolutely no wild woman./Jin Dong married you so beautifully ... < P > J: (Put the phone away) Honey, I'm telling you, you are oversensitive./What? Are you going out for dinner tonight? /I'll pick up the children? /Ok. /

C: (with a flattering face) Jin Dong, hehe, Jin Dong, so you are the famous Jin Dong.

J: Save it, your boy. You just said that I was too old to find a job, but you didn't say ...

C: Misunderstanding, absolutely misunderstanding. That was me. I'm sure.

J: hey, can I not come? If I don't come, the first bunch of kids will mess with me. Let's say last year. Our unit recruited a legal consultant. When we introduced them, it was great. They studied abroad and came from Harvard.

C: Not bad!

J: once, I called him and asked him to sort out some business-related regulations for me. The next morning, a thick stack was placed on my desk.

C: Seriously!

J: forget it. let me see: this law is based on > Revision.

C: That's right.

J: Article 32 When a people's court tries a divorce case, if mediation fails, it should be granted a divorce: 1. Bigamy or a spouse cohabiting with others.

C: Isn't this what the proprietress is worried about?

J: (giving him a white look) As a result, I called him to the office. He looked at sheet piling horizontally and vertically. He quickly apologized. He said, Oh, Jin Dong, I'm really sorry. Yesterday, I had two more drinks and Baidu searched for the marriage law. I asked him. Didn't you study abroad? Not Harvard? The quality of education in this international famous university is so poor. Guess what he said? Jin Dong, I am actually an American citizen, studying in China, Harbin Buddhist College. Isn't this called Harvard for short? Later, it was found that his lawyer's qualification certificate was fake.

C: Then how did he get into your company?

J: No, the technical director there is the son of Si menstruation, the third cousin of his second uncle.

C: Oh, it turns out that there is an affair.

J: Alas, there are too many things of cronyism these days. I say to find someone with five years' experience as a driver. An employee has found his uncle with fifteen years' experience. < p

J: He has been a cook for fifteen years. I said to recruit an operator. An employee's sister was recruited, and her voice was sweet and pleasant. Unfortunately, she stuttered. This made those customers anxious and inactive, and now they all came to my office. When they came in, it was just a slap in the face. Jin Dong, if you don't go on the road, you won't sign the contract. Tell an operator to play tricks. (slapping his head) A business deal has gone bad.

C: (rubbing his palm) It seems that I have hope now. I'm telling you, I didn't take my main course for nothing in the past four years. Picking up girls is the same as getting rid of my boss. As long as you think of him as a girl, it will be a success. The first move is to kiss up. You can wear everything, but you can't wear it. (Stamping with excitement) <

C: No ...No. The second measure is to show sincerity. Jin Dong, since your company is so short of people, why don't you let me ...

J: You boy? Your education, your experience, your ...

C: Jin Dong, these are not important, are they? The key is my good character. I have no relatives in your company. The same tragedy won't happen again.

J: Really?

C: I went in early. (Cover your mouth) The third trick is to pretend to be pathetic. (Hug) Jin Dong, please accept me. I will be your cow and horse, your maid and your handmaiden all my life. I am hardworking and honest. I just want to eat. I have an 8-year-old mother and an eight-year-old girl. E-flattery is a smoky thing. People's life is short. One day they close their eyes and one day they open them, and the rest of their lives are gone. (Imitating Xiao Shenyang)

C: Oh, my God, Xiao Shenyang. The fourth move is to suit their needs. Jin Dong, how about this? Classmate, classmate.

J: Who is your classmate?

C: I mean, a sketch by a classmate of ours, Xiao Shenyang.

J: (looking at his watch) Okay, okay. I'm really late. If you really want to join our company? Let's wait for my son to hire you.

C: (Happy) I finally have a chance. Where is your son now?

J: I'm on my way to his place.

C: then let's drop by.

J: (waving) driver, blue sky kindergarten.