Are you safe to leave your child to a nanny?

On June 22, an arson attack by a nanny occurred in Hangzhou. A fire caused by Mo Moujing killed four of her employer’s mother and son. A week has passed since this incident, but the discussion has not subsided. This fire also burned many people's trust in the nanny.

Overnight, nannying seemed to have become a high-risk industry. In fact, hiring nannies to take care of household chores and children has become the norm in many urban families. We interviewed eight hostesses in Beijing, Shanghai and Hangzhou and talked with them about nannies.

If the old man can’t come, the nanny will come

After the child is born, the old man can’t come to help for various reasons, so hiring a nanny becomes the only option. Most of the eight families we interviewed It was after the confinement sisters left that they started to hire nannies. Two families directly left the confinement sisters as nannies.

This is the case for the nanny of Ye Zi's family. The confinement nanny has been staying at her house for five years, and her salary has always been according to the standard of confinement nanny: 7,000 yuan.

When Li Hong was in confinement, she hired a confinement nanny with a high salary of 14,000 yuan. After she was one month old, she accepted the invitation to stay as a live-in nanny, and her salary was reduced to 7,000 yuan. Except for these two, we The salaries of ordinary nannies interviewed in this interview are around 5,000-6,000 yuan, which also represents the mid-range salary of nannies in first- and second-tier cities (there is also an Indonesian nanny with a monthly salary of 8,000 yuan).

For most families, whether it is financial or emotional considerations, asking the elderly to help take care of the children is still the first choice. Hiring a nanny is out of necessity, but some mothers think differently. "I drove my mother home." Han Lin said that when the child was 3 months old, she hired a nanny and asked her grandmother, who had been helping her, to go home. "On the one hand, I was very worried that her body would not be able to bear it, and on the other hand, I felt that even my mother Trivial conflicts are unavoidable, so I might as well hire a nanny.”

I went to her house, and then I felt confident that I could go back to my own home.

I decided to hire a nanny, and I asked everyone to recommend it. The first thing that comes to mind, however, is what a mother said: I sent a message to Moments to ask who has a reliable nanny, and there are a bunch of messages below saying, if anyone has a reliable nanny, hurry up and keep it for yourself!

Most families still hire nannies through intermediary companies and labor market channels. After settling the one-time introduction fee with the intermediary company, the nanny can only provide a copy of their ID card, and even a health certificate is not a standard. match.

Many mothers talk about how when choosing a nanny, they can only ask if they have experience in taking care of children, see if the nanny can clean up by themselves, or they just can’t explain the unexplained “eye connection”.

“At that time, I asked my aunt about her previous employer. I heard that she took care of her child from birth to when he was three years old and went to kindergarten. I thought it should be reliable.” Han Lin said, now that I think about it, It was just a matter of luck. In fact, I should have asked my aunt for the phone number of my previous employer.

In contrast, Liu Jing’s approach is more diligent. She is from Zhejiang. She heard that there are good nannies in Quzhou. She rushed there from Shanghai. After finding the aunt through an agency, she went to her house to have a look. She knew where her house was and what her husband and children were doing, so she took her home with confidence.

Some families choose foreign nannies because they are "uneasy". Linda in Beijing is an Indonesian nanny who did everything possible to hire someone to bring her back from abroad. Although the agency fee is expensive, the nanny has undergone very formal and strict training and handed over her passport and mobile phone as soon as she arrived. This gave Linda a great deal of help. Great sense of security.

Install a surveillance system or use people without suspicion?

After the nanny arrives, how does a family accept this outsider? What is the process of going from stranger to trust? Linda believes more in the norms resulting from strict vocational training. She mentioned that once her family traveled to Hainan and left a nanny to look after the house. Later, she saw from the camera (installed to prevent theft, not to monitor the nanny) that her aunt's My life is extremely regular. In addition to cleaning every day, I watch TV. And I don't even sit on the sofa at home, but only sit on the small stool next to the sofa.

More families have to go through repeated trials and trials.

“At first, the aunt took the child downstairs to play, and we followed her from a distance.

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“I would secretly ask the neighbors in the community, how is my aunt doing when she is taking care of her children outside? "

"The house has a password lock. At first, my mother was a little worried about telling her the password to my aunt. It took about a week before she told her. "

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We also interviewed people in the industry and found that such temptations are normal. The person in charge of a government company in Hangzhou said that he would advise employers (many people do the same) () Do an integrity test during the trial period. Put a 5 yuan under the sofa today and a 10 yuan on the coffee table tomorrow, and take pictures with a mobile phone that can show the date of the photo.

If you find that the nanny has taken the money. If you leave, it’s best to find an excuse to resign.

The person in charge also mentioned that before taking up the job, you can ask the nanny for the phone numbers of her family, previous employers, and friends, and call them one by one. Ask about her situation and get a more comprehensive understanding of her family, work attitude and interpersonal relationships. If you are really worried, you can entrust a special back investigation company and the agency will sign a contract with the back investigation company to conduct the investigation and acceptance. The scope of the company's investigation includes basic information, such as ID card, academic degree, criminal information, and even whether the company is a legal person, shareholders, as well as work resume and work performance.

However, on this issue, Liu Jing showed that. Her unique wisdom is: "If you are not sure, don't look for it. If you do, trust it completely." Liu Jing said that in her home, the nanny is with the children 24 hours a day. She is also opposed to installing surveillance because she believes, "Your distrust will definitely have a negative impact on the aunt." ”

Nanny, employee, relative, or family member?

Liu Jing, who insists on “employing without suspicion”, believes that hiring a nanny is not a simple employment relationship, but should be treated as a family member This is what she did: the best room in the house was for her aunt to take her children with her, and she would have a share of the bird's nests at home, and all treatments would be the same.

It is inevitable for a nanny to eat and live with the owner in the same house and be as close as the family