Who knows the traditional concept of Xianyou? In urgent need. thank you

I am an old man who has lived in Shijiazhuang for more than 60 years. My hometown is Jianning, and I have been paying close attention to Fujian. I am traveling in northern Fujian. My two aunts and aunts live not far from Jianning. In the early 1980s, I was a reporter, and I went there to investigate, check local chronicles and visit the elderly. Fujian and Zhejiang, including Suzhou and Hangzhou, were mostly moved southward by the gentry in the Tang and Song Dynasties, so the culture in this area was developed and celebrities from various counties came forth in large numbers. The traditional ideas left over from thousands of years are firm, and the folk customs in different regions are similar. I think the traditional concepts in this respect can be summarized as follows: attaching importance to etiquette (which I know best), stressing benevolence and righteousness, attaching importance to moral cultivation, obeying laws and regulations, being diligent and thrifty, being conscientious, and being honest and dedicated. In the southeast coastal areas of Fujian, people are more open-minded because they started their businesses in Nanyang hundreds of years ago. Western Fujian and northern Fujian are mountainous areas. Up to now, they still have strong traditional ideas and are very simple and kind, so most families are not very rich.

In terms of folklore, the following are still preserved:

Dismount, also known as "taking off sandals": In ancient times, when a person who was far away from home went out to be an official or returned to his hometown for business, his cousins, cousins and other relatives would prepare noodles and eggs (or cook a bowl of snacks) to show their respect, commonly known as "dismount". It means to welcome relatives who come back from afar. After they accept gifts, they must return towels and soap to express their gratitude to their relatives and friends for their kindness. So make sure how many relatives you have when you go and prepare a small gift in return. )

Farewell: In the old days, when a person went out to take exams, be an official or do business, relatives and friends would cook him a bowl of noodles (mostly rice noodles) and eggs, which meant wishing him peace and success. After receiving the following eggs, the host will give back a few pieces of brown sugar (now candy) to show that he will not forget the sweetness of his relatives in his hometown, and then give them towels and soap as a reward when he comes back from going out. Now some rural areas continue to congratulate villagers on joining the army and going to college with old ceremonies. (now send a red envelope)

Seeing a girl off: When a girl is getting married, relatives and friends will send her a batch of clothes or daily necessities, which is called seeing her off. The girl will give them pomegranate bags, red balls, white cakes and pork picked by her husband's family. Just send a red envelope now. )

Congratulations (that is, giving gifts): In Xianyou rural areas, all families who get married, "celebrate their tenth birthday" or "congratulate" (that is, celebrate the completion of their new houses) should wrap red envelopes (some of which are in kind) as gifts. The host will prepare a banquet for them as a thank you. Especially when you get married, it's a gift from relatives. In addition to entertaining them, the host will also give them a knife of "ancestor meat" (usually a piece of meat) and a string of red balls, white cakes, pomegranate bags and so on. , commonly known as "return".

Guest: When visiting the countryside, the host will cook a big bowl of noodles with eggs, peanuts, meat and other dishes. Guests can't eat all the snacks, but must leave some. This is called "leaving the bottom of the bowl". (I ran away from home when I was a child. 1969. I went home for the first time after 20 years, and even my neighbors gave me a big bowl. Our bowls in Jianning are very rich, and there are also famous specialties such as chestnut, Jianlian, Jianning mushrooms and winter bamboo shoots. At first, I didn't understand. I didn't leave the bottom of the bowl. It's broken! )

Hang up ("beans" sound. Original meaning: neck): If a child visits a relative's house for the first time, when he leaves, the host will tie some money with a red bun and hang it around the child's neck. This is called "hanging".

Xie Shi: In the past, when parents delayed teachers' teaching, they had to put food and wine in boxes and send them to teachers' homes. First, ask children to pay tribute to their teachers, and then give them a red envelope with a learning reward, which is called "Xie Shi". When the master accepted these gifts, he recognized his apprentice and began to teach him skills.

Looking for an object: There is a saying that a girl who immigrates to Xianyou looks for an object: "Only look at the children, not the fields." In other words, it depends on whether young men are honest, hardworking and frugal, and there are not many requirements for fields and gifts. Young men only ask the woman to be decent and frugal when choosing a spouse. The two sides are congenial and form a good husband and wife.

Engagement: With the consent of both young men and women and their parents, elders will be invited to the woman's house for engagement, and engagement gifts will be given to each other, and wedding candy will be distributed to neighbors and relatives. Others are afraid to intervene and propose again.

You can't use chickens and ducks for the first course of the engagement party (only chickens and ducks can be used for the second course). In Xianyou dialect, chicken is homophonic with restraint, and duck is homophonic with rush. If chicken is served on the first course, it will be mistaken for: "This marriage has contradictions and must be resolved by force"; If a duck is served, it will be mistaken for "I am not sincere about this marriage." If I want to play tricks and don't leave automatically, I will drive you away. " If you don't do it well, your marriage will break up. Another custom is that the woman's family will cook a bowl of egg noodles for everyone. If both parties agree to get married, this bowl of egg noodles can be eaten. If you disagree, you can't eat this bowl of egg noodles. If you eat it, you will be in trouble.

Marriage prediction: the date of marriage is decided by the man. One month before marriage, inform the woman to get ready. Any requirements of both parties should be agreed before marriage.

Pick up the bride: usually before the morning of the wedding day 10, the bride will be taken to the man's house. In the past, the bride and groom had to take a sedan chair, but now they have to take a car. The number of people who go to see relatives should be odd, and the number of people who come back should make up a double number. The bride's dowry sets are more or less, and the requirements are not very high. The two sides agreed in advance. There are three main things: one is to accompany a bowl and a pair of chopsticks to show that the bride sincerely goes to the man's house to get married; Two, peanuts, cereal seeds, beans, onions, garlic and other 9- 13 seeds (each packaged in red paper), meaning rooting, flowering, bearing fruit, hard work and reproduction; Third, we should accompany a pig heart and share it with the man's family, which means harmony and unity.

When the bride gets on the bus, the bridesmaid will hold the red umbrella brought by the man and escort her on the bus. When the bride leaves her family, the family will close immediately, which means that the rich side will not be taken away by the bride.

Door-to-door: When the bride collects fireworks near the man's house, the man's house should be avoided (to avoid rushing to the door and family discord), so that the whole family will be harmonious after marriage. When the bride enters the room, the man's family will come out to meet her, increase the fire, set up sweet eggs and tables and entertain the bride's guests. Then, a woman, a child and the expected bride's partner accompanied the bride, toasted her father, uncle, brother and sister-in-law, and accepted gifts (red envelopes). At noon, a banquet was held to entertain guests.

Make trouble in the bridal chamber: On the wedding night, the groom invited guests to do "sutras" in the bridal chamber, and carried out activities such as poetry, singing, dancing, solve riddles on the lanterns and story telling, which was very lively.