To immigrate or study abroad, you must first learn to endure loneliness.

Loneliness is a compulsory course to go abroad, from familiar to unfamiliar. After the initial novelty, loneliness came to mind. Sometimes when a person is abroad, he often recalls the reunion of friends, the care of parents and the familiar taste of hometown, as well as the loneliness of going abroad. Only those who have experienced it can understand it.

1

Loneliness is a compulsory course to go abroad. At least in the eyes of Xiao Qiao's friend Ah Fu.

Afu is a post-90s student, studying in a big rural area of France. The excitement of studying abroad disappeared after the first month, followed by loneliness.

There are not many Chinese in the school he chose. Afu, who is not fluent in French, has been frustrated in making new friends, unable to integrate into the entertainment activities of the French and unable to drink well. After class, he was in no hurry to go home. Others left the classroom in droves to attend the party. Only the leftovers left by the cold apartment and breakfast and unwashed tableware were waiting for him.

Sometimes, Ah Fu will wonder why he left home and came to France thousands of kilometers away. He was depressed for a long time without anyone talking, and even began to doubt his social skills, and even his motivation to learn began to be insufficient.

The circle is too small to integrate into the life of local people, and living alone may be the daily life of many people who go abroad. Ah Fu told Xiao Qiao that the biggest loneliness was not in daily life, but that he didn't go home last Spring Festival. While reviewing the exam content, he turned on the computer to watch the live webcast of the Spring Festival Evening. The scene of family reunion in the live broadcast and the family photo sent by his family instantly made him burst into tears.

2

Christine is a friend that Xiao Qiao met at a university activity several years ago. After graduating from college, she studied as a graduate student in the United States and then married a high-quality young man in the United States.

In Xiao Qiao's impression, she loves cooking American dramas and organizing bands to cover English rock songs. Since she went to college, she has had many fantasies about America. Now, she has lived the life she once wanted. She spends time drying short stories in her circle of friends, and drying interesting things that happened at work with her husband's family.

By chance, Xiao Qiao chatted with her again, only to find that her life was not so glamorous. As China's daughter-in-law, her loneliness is deeply buried in her heart.

In her relationship with her husband, she often steps on some? Minefield? For example, she sometimes spoiled and asked her husband to accompany her shopping and help her carry a backpack, which often made her feel unable to communicate; When she gets along with local friends, she always seems out of place. Although these friends are very enthusiastic and will call her when they have any activities, she will always be the one who listens quietly and can't understand or get in a word.

Now, in the face of giving birth, she is timid. What she is afraid of is the difference between her and her husband on the education of their children, and whether the children will be more lonely if they grow up in the local cultural environment after birth.

three

Loneliness is not the same as loneliness. Loneliness means you can't find anyone. Loneliness is that you choose a person by yourself, and sometimes you choose a person passively. Which is more sad, the loneliness of staying away from the crowd after going abroad or the loneliness that can still be felt in the crowd?

Overcoming loneliness is a process that requires self-affirmation. In this regard, Xiao Qiao's former senior, Mark, has the most say.

Today, he is already an investment bank elite on Wall Street. At first, when he came to America with great ambition, he was quickly shattered by reality. A series of troubles and endless loneliness such as work, visa and rent made him want to return to China. His circle of friends is only within the scope of international students, and most of them can't give any guidance on his work prospects and life goals.

Make local friends, chat with people from different backgrounds, catch up with local cultural knowledge, and participate in various activities and parties, so that his oriental face will gradually become a guest of local family, and his circle of friends and contacts will also grow step by step. Mark also regards America as his second hometown.

Some people think that going abroad is glamorous, but they don't think how much patience they have paid behind it. Life will always experience environmental changes. From the moment you make a decision to go abroad, it means that you have to bear the psychological changes brought about by it. Studying abroad is like this, so is living abroad. Think about it first, okay? Why do you want to go abroad? This problem, and then accept the short loneliness, can find their place in the new environment.