Counterattack in life can start with "pretending"

I was reading this at night and was deeply touched when I saw this passage.

?I find that people who are nervous about speaking in public say awful things to themselves, words that they would never say to anyone else:

I'm terrible at giving presentations.

I got nervous once and it ruined me. I'm a horrible public speaker.

Nobody wants to listen to me. I'm boring.

If these are the type of phrases you repeat to yourself day after day, it's no wonder you get nervous! You cannot control what other people say about you, but you can control the story playing on your internal channel.

?——"The storyteller's secret" Garmine Gallo

The general meaning of the entire paragraph is: Many people who have stage fright when speaking in public places often look down on themselves and say to themselves Derogatory things they would never say to others, like "My speaking skills are really bad," "I'm a terrible speaker. I've screwed up my speeches before.", "No one should want to listen to me." Speech. I'm boring." If you demean yourself day after day. It will be strange if you are not nervous. Many times, we cannot control what others think of us, but at least we can control our self-perception and self-recognition.

Reflecting on the past, we are often like those who suffer from stage fright when speaking, and have said many harsh words to ourselves. In life, we often think like Amy Cuddy that we are not that good. (Amy Cuddy, a famous TED speaker, her "Your body language may shape who you are" translates to "Body language shapes yourself", with more than 170 million YouTube views)

Seven years ago, I Graduated from college. In the winter before graduation, I took the postgraduate examination. At that time, I applied for Nankai University, but I was hesitant during the preparation period, and my self-confidence was at the bottom. The results were no surprise. When looking for a job during the graduation season, my expectations for the future are not high due to the impact of the postgraduate entrance examination results. I thought that as long as I could teach in a high school, I would be satisfied. Because I missed the golden period for recruiting after taking the postgraduate entrance examination, there were very few job opportunities at the school in the spring of the following year. But fortunately, most of the resumes I submitted got interviews.

Teacher interviews generally consist of a written test, an interview, and a trial lecture. Some schools sometimes include a lecture session. The interview and trial lectures are the hardest to control. On-site Q&A and on-site lesson preparation require high adaptability and basic basic skills. Before the interview, I had little experience in interviews and trial lectures. However, I have been a TV fan since I was a child, and I have a lot of fantasies about the scenery on the podium. Before the interview and trial lecture, my mind was filled with imaginary scenes of myself being glorious on the podium. Growing up, I have always been introverted and rarely speak or give speeches in public. However, there is never a lack of imagination in my head about how to be glorious on stage. What’s sad is that during the graduation season that year, I kept pretending to talk on the podium, and those pretense made me come away with a lot of achievements. As long as I participated in teacher interviews that year, I basically won all the positions. The position I finally chose that year was also the position I was most satisfied with. I chose to stay in Wuhan and became a teacher in a key high school in Wuhan. There were 6 rounds of interviews at this high school, which lasted 4 months. I finally overcame all obstacles and broke through the siege. I remember that the other teachers who were hired during the same period, except for another undergraduate from Beijing Normal University, were all graduate students and doctoral students from prestigious universities.

Even though one year has passed since I taught high school in Wuhan, my passion for teaching Chinese as a foreign language has not diminished. As the registration deadline for Chinese teachers approached, I finally mustered up the courage to submit my resume. Although I knew that I could not meet the postgraduate academic requirements required by Hanban, I finally decided to give it a try and boldly signed up. After weighing my expectations against the resources, I applied for a Chinese teaching position at the State University of S?o Paulo in Brazil.

Fortunately, I successfully passed the resume screening and also passed the written test, interview and trial lecture organized by Hanban. However, due to the temporary adjustment of positions in the school in Brazil, Hanban made adjustments to teachers who passed the selection examination based on their comprehensive performance. Finally, I received a notice that I would be transferred to the most demanding American school in my memory. After accepting the job transfer, Hanban arranged for me the last interview for foreign teachers from the United States. Only by passing this US interview can the position be finally transferred successfully. There was a week of preparation time before the interview. Because I had never dealt with Americans or even had a real conversation with foreigners in English, I felt very uneasy. During the preparation period, I had always fantasized about being able to converse fluently in English, and the self-satisfaction of being able to use a foreign language proficiently emerged spontaneously. The interview took place a week later. Although I was a little nervous at first, I quickly entered the "pretend" state. In fact, I also knew at the time that I might have made grammatical misalignments in many of my sentences because I spoke them too fast, but this did not stop me from communicating with them. The more I spoke, the more excited I became. Finally, I successfully transferred to this position in the United States.

After my two-year term in the US position ended, I returned to a domestic technology company specializing in heads-up displays to work in an overseas operations position. The interview focused on English communication skills. The company CEO is an English major. Although I changed careers and lacked experience in the position, my previous pretend scenes and interviews in English helped my confidence begin to take off again.

Now I often attend some international exhibitions and have phone conferences or face-to-face meetings with overseas customers. I also recently moved to the United States. English has now been integrated into life and has become a tool for a new way of thinking. I still remember when I first came to the United States. Before I could speak English, I always had to translate the content I wanted to express from Chinese into English in my mind. Over time, the translation movement in my mind no longer occurred. In most situations in life now, I can blurt out English.

Looking back, the "pretend" in the past seems to have really become a fact.

However, I have recently moved to the United States and spend too much time looking down the road. I blame myself more and more in my heart and "pretend" less and less.

Before going to bed at night, I read the passage in the scroll again and read it softly to my husband. He repeated Amy Cuddy's words: Fake it, until you make it; Fake it, until you become it.

"Fake" starts with daily body language; "Fake" , start by praising yourself; start by "pretending", also start by imagining more beautiful scenes of yourself.

As a new generation of immigrants, I "pretend" to be at the center of the world stage, shining with the light of China.

Recommendation: Amy Cuddy’s speech "Your body language may shape who you are" (translated as "Body Language May Shape Who You Are"), as the beginning of her speech said, is a non-black speech for us. The gift of technology that everyone can do. This is not an inspirational speech, but a scientifically based human psychology revelation and a concrete, feasible and practical methodology.