Funny copywriting full of routines

1. If you can only choose one person and food you like, how do you choose a foodie? Foodie: Eat the person you like.

2. Recruit a closed disciple with a tuition fee of 888 yuan. They only teach closed doors. Now that you sign up, you will also be taught to turn off the lights, close the windows and turn off the air conditioner.

3. When I was in college, there was a female classmate who had a good relationship with me and was a bit ambiguous. One day in class, she quietly said to me: "Be my prince." I was excited. , blurted out: "Okay, Queen Mother."

4. I fell down on the street. People around me laughed at me, and I was so angry that I got up and fell down several times, making them laugh to death!

5. According to research, 90% of boys cannot find out why their girlfriends are angry, and the remaining 10% cannot even tell whether they are angry or not!

6. Times have changed. Now every day when I watch videos of beautiful sisters on Douyin or live streaming platforms, I feel like I am in love. Unlike before, I had to fall in love in person.

7. If you have no money or time to travel, buy a globe. The world is so big, you can not only see it, but also walk around it.

8. When I give birth to a son in the future, I want to name him "So Handsome". Then when people see me, they will say: "What a handsome dad!"

9. I suddenly discovered it today , love in junior high school died from changing seats, high school died from placement, college died from graduation, and I am neither of them. Until now, I have no shame to fall in love, and died from looks.

10. I chased my dreams. Others said I was naive and ridiculous, but I persisted. Later I found out that it was really childish and ridiculous.

11. From my point of view, there is no age difference in love. As long as you have a good-looking face, it doesn’t matter if you are a person of five thousand years or more.

12. I was simmering rice in the morning and asked my husband: "Do you want softer rice or harder rice?" My husband looked at me disdainfully and said: "It sounds like you know how to simmer rice." Same, I hope to eat cooked. "I...

Thirteen. There must be pure friendship between men and women, because every girl who knows me says that the most they can do is be friends with me.

14. "Let's talk about something heavier. For example, your weight!" After a while of silence, the sister replied: "This is too heavy, so let's talk about something superficial. For example, your IQ! ”

15. While my wife was taking a shower, I looked at her phone and found a voice chat between her and her mother-in-law. The wife said: "My chest feels tight today. I'll beat him up later to vent my anger." Mother-in-law: "Don't do anything unreasonable. Let's settle old scores first to set the stage."

16. Okay. I hope there is such a person who can make me think about things day and night, not thinking about food and drink, having trouble sleeping and eating, and become thinner and thinner, thinner, thinner, thinner.

17. What to do if you don’t want to do laundry. Just take a daughter-in-law. If the daughter-in-law is virtuous, she will wash your clothes; if the daughter-in-law is strong, you will learn how to wash clothes.

18. My friend coughed while smoking. I advised him: You can't quit smoking. He said: You can't quit! If you quit, you will end up killing someone. Me: Are you so addicted to smoking? He said: No, your sister-in-law said that if I can quit smoking in this life, she will die...

Nineteen. She is actually ugly. There is nothing to be ashamed of, no one wants it if it is lost.

Twenty. What moment made you feel that you were really poor? God’s reply: I’ve searched all the buildings in the school, but I can’t find a Nokia mobile phone charger. 21. I was scolded by the teacher for sleeping in class today. But I was not sad because there was also a girl I had loved for a long time who was also scolded. The teacher’s voice could not calm down in my ears for a long time: You two didn’t sleep last night. ?

22. Before Yu Gong died, he called his son to his bedside and said with all his strength: "Move mountains! Move mountains!" Son: "Sparkling?"

23. The male god finally confessed his love to me: "On your wedding day, will you walk down the hall with me?" I nodded excitedly, and I became the best man!

The twenty-four and a half-year-old granddaughter asked her grandma how old she was. Grandma said that she was very old, so old that she couldn’t remember her age. The granddaughter said: "If you don't remember, you can look at the label on your knickers. Mine said 5 to 6 years old.

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