Why did Gu Cheng kill his wife?

What kind of person is Gu Cheng? How did he go from poet to butcher? What kind of life did he and Xie Ye spend on the desert island? Why did you kill your wife Xie Ye? In the messy home of poet Liu Zhanqiu, Li Ying faced questions from domestic reporters for the first time after the Gucheng massacre. She wants to get rid of the shadow of the past, face the normal life of the public, and fulfill her literary dream. But the problem and the narrative must start with an inevitable tragedy.

Living a "shadow" life on Waiheke Island

From the moment I met Gu Cheng, I fell into the fantasy of aestheticism, which was very idealistic. Before Gu Cheng went abroad, I only met him four times, always with friends, not alone. Just like every time I go to the temple for pilgrimage, my spiritual world is enveloped by his aura.

The reason I wanted to go abroad later was to gain a free space. Beijing's alleys can bring a sense of intimacy to people, but there is no private space, at least no room of their own. All thoughts and love for Liu Zhanqiu are suppressed. I want to find a place where no one cares about me and I can live in the open air. Another idea is to create a space abroad and invite Zhanqiu to go abroad so that we can walk freely on the streets.

On July 5, 1990, I left Beijing for New Zealand. After a week in Waiheke Island, I proposed to Gu Cheng to look for a job outside because money was a specific issue at that time. The atmosphere suddenly became tense. I had never seen Gu Cheng with such a bad face before. I realized I had let him down and he felt worldly that he couldn't stand. This created a divide in me where I couldn’t decide what was right or wrong. I thought my freedom and independence were not worldly. Xie Ye told me not to anger him, as his emotions were very extreme. After a few days, he softened and I took a breath.

In fact, there are no jobs, commerce, industry, or other Chinese on the island. This island was discovered by Gu Cheng while traveling with his friends. Since the 1960s, some British immigrants with misanthropic tendencies have gathered here. Gu's loneliness is innate and he is not sociable. On the surface, he is polite to others, but he has difficulty communicating with others. He said it's important to have someone to talk to. I feel very honored to be able to communicate with Gu Cheng. At that time, I felt that I was very mature. I could understand everything he said and his dream space. He is the same to me.

After being on the island for a long time, Gu Cheng and I could chat about poetry and spirituality, and I began to turn my feelings for Zhanqiu and my desire for him into a secular reality. Zhan Qiu said at the beginning that even if she got divorced, she could not marry me because she did not want to wear shackles. It hurt me a lot at first. I could live on an island without this pain. I can only talk about spiritual love, not physical love. I thought paying attention to the city would give me these things. At home, my relationship with Zhanqiu is secretive and repressed, and I cannot tell my family and friends. For example, I wanted to tell all my best friends about my first kiss with Zhanqiu, but it was impossible. When you go to a restaurant with him to eat, you first need to see if there are any acquaintances there. This is one of the reasons that inspired me to go abroad and go to the island.

On the island, I became another "shadow". My friend in Auckland called me and asked me to go. I can't say why not. When media outlets from Taiwan come to interview or request articles, I always leave the room beforehand and hide by the beach. Although he didn't ask me to leave, I realized that I had to give myself a step down.