Female lawyer Chloe

Chloe has the appearance of a typical Hong Kong woman: a slender face, big eyes with deep depressions under double eyelids far apart on both sides of a high nose bridge, voluptuous yet delicate Although the skin of her lips is not as fair as that of women from the north (people north of Guangdong and Hong Kong are called the north), they are exceptionally harmonious on that slender figure. If you meet her in Central, Hong Kong, you can tell that she is a female lawyer just by glancing at her black suit, dark brown shoulder-length hair with highlights, capable manners, and cold temperament.

The first time I met Chloe was in early 1993. It was my first day working in Hong Kong after moving to Hong Kong from the United States. My office was next to Chloe's. This is my third visit to Hong Kong. My last two stays in Hong Kong together did not exceed ten days, so I am not familiar with Hong Kong. Speaking of which, moving to Hong Kong was accidental. A law firm working in the United States sent me and two partners to Beijing for a meeting. When we returned to the United States, our secretary made a mistake in making arrangements. We booked a flight back to the United States that required a transfer in Hong Kong when we could have booked a direct return flight. In the early 1990s, Hong Kong was still under the jurisdiction of the British. Without special permission, Chinese could not transit to Hong Kong from abroad. The transfer happened on Friday afternoon. Since I arrived in this city, I decided to stay for a weekend to see the local customs and customs. Central with its tall buildings, the popular Causeway Bay, the Star Ferry full of local flavor, Victoria Peak with its charming night view... When I looked at the dimly lit Kowloon City across the harbor from the floor-to-ceiling window of my hotel room, I suddenly realized that I like this vibrant city where Eastern and Western cultures intertwine, and I decided to make a career here. Hong Kong is a fast-paced and efficient society. After a few weeks, I came back for an interview and the offer letter came. After careful consideration, I decided to join McGwire Law Firm.

McQuay is a top old law firm in the UK. It has a long history and is therefore relatively conservative. Most of the lawyers in the firm are men. The senior lawyers are all men, and except for two Hong Kongers, they are all white. . The few female lawyers are junior to mid-level local lawyers, including me. Chloe qualified as a barrister several years earlier than the rest of us female lawyers and is more senior than us. Although several other female lawyers have similar qualifications to me, they studied law at university under the British education system. After graduation, they practiced as apprentices and took the bar exam. Unlike me, who studied law in college for four years in China, and then studied for a doctorate in law in the United States for another three years. After graduation, I worked in the field for a few years before coming to Hong Kong. Therefore, although I am similar in age, I have less experience in the field than them.

The female lawyers in the firm are basically single young women. The work projects vary, but the workload is heavy. I spend at least twelve hours every day in the office catching up on work. We often get together to eat, chat, climb mountains, watch movies, and talk about our bosses. We can be considered intimate and harmonious when we get along. I am the only one with a Mainland background in the institute, and since I don’t understand Cantonese, I often feel like an outsider who cannot devote myself wholeheartedly. Gradually, it was discovered that Chloe in the team was not very gregarious either. Chloe is the kind of person who is unsmiling and aloof. When meeting others in the corridor of the office, they would always exchange a few words. Chloe would always just nod, smile or simply answer the greetings and then walk away. Except for talking about work, no one who knows her would have any unnecessary pleasantries with her. Other female lawyers complained behind her back that because of her strong professional ability, she was favored by her boss and did not take other young lawyers seriously, and so on. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with Chloe keeping her distance from everyone. It’s warm but not overwhelming for women to be together. Although Chloe has a colder temper, she is still quite enthusiastic towards people.

I am a night owl. I always wake up half an hour later than others in the morning. I usually put on my coat and shoes in the elevator, and my makeup is usually done in a taxi. Breakfast is usually just a cup of coffee, bought downstairs in the company and then taken to the office to drink. Chloe usually comes to the office before me, and by the time I arrive she's buried in a pile of paperwork. I don’t know when I started to come to the office and find a box of fruit or a croissant on the table. At first I didn't know who bought it for me, until I happened to pass by Chloe's office and saw her eating the same thing, I realized it was her. When thanking her, she just smiled lightly and said that my breakfast was too unhealthy. Every night when Chloe left the company, she would stop by my office and lean against the door to chat for a while. Talk about movies, books, hot topics, but never work or company. Over time, we became friends. I don’t think Chloe only likes me because of my extraordinary charm. It may be precisely because I am an outsider in their circle, with a completely different background from her and other female lawyers. It is a breath of fresh air for her. The other female lawyers in the firm have similar backgrounds: they studied together at the University of Hong Kong, or studied together in the UK. They were once competitors for further education or employment. Their parents may have known each other, or they may have loved a man at the same time... We all have the same background. The history of China must carry the burden of long acquaintance.

Chloe grew up in a difficult environment. Her mother was from a poor family when she was young, but had outstanding looks. After graduating from high school, she was spotted by a man who was successful in business but was more than ten years older than him. Although this man already had a wife and children, it did not prevent him from pursuing Chloe's mother fiercely.

Her mother couldn't resist the temptation of this mature man's love and luxury gifts, so she married him as his concubine a year later. Hong Kong followed the "Qing Code" during the British colonial period. It was not until the marriage law reform in the 1970s that monogamy was legally implemented. Therefore, concubinage was legal for Chinese in Hong Kong in the 1960s and was more common among the rich. . Her mother had two more brothers in the four years after she gave birth to Chloe.

Chloe's memories are filled with the embarrassment of her father never showing up at the school's parent-teacher conference, her mother's disappointment when she expected her father to come home for dinner and spend the night every day, and her mother's acceptance speech at family gatherings during the holidays. The three siblings gave the aunt a big gift and sat down for the humiliation. Chloe's eyes were filled with hurt and hostility when she spoke of her father. She hasn't seen her father since attending college on a full scholarship. At the ceremony where she graduated from the University of Hong Kong with first place honors, she saw her father sitting in the crowd. She pretended not to see him. From the time she started working, she began to support her mother and provide for her younger brothers to study, and did not allow them to accept support from their father. She was scarred in her heart, but I couldn't bear to ask her what she said, but I felt that there must be other sad things that I couldn't share. Otherwise, why wouldn't my father provide for her? Is this his responsibility as a father? A girl who is extremely smart and highly self-respecting must have a sensitive heart. During her growth, she must have caught many aunts and concubines, and many preferential treatments and other subtle relationships in two different families. Her two brothers seemed much more relaxed and happy than she was. However, when I met Chloe's mother, I once doubted Chloe's judgment.

When I first met Chloe’s mother, I estimated that she was in her early forties. With a round face, fair and delicate skin, and a plump figure, her movements exuded a strong sense of femininity. There was no sophistication in her eyes, and her smile had the shyness of a young girl. When she was eating, she brought me some food. In front of me was a pair of white, plump, round and smooth hands. I subconsciously kept my hands, as rough as a man's, tightly under the dining table. This woman didn't seem to have suffered much, nor did she seem to have suffered any psychological damage. I couldn't connect her with the tortured concubine in Chloe's mouth. How complex and elusive the human heart is!

At that time, after the firm completed a big project, the partners would often invite the young lawyers in the firm to have a few drinks together at the bar downstairs in Exchange Square, firstly to celebrate the successful completion of the project, and secondly. Come and cheer everyone up and reduce stress. Most of us have a lively and cheerful personality. After drinking for three rounds, we talk loudly or laugh and play. We are the most noisy group in the bar. After a few glasses of wine, Raisa would sit in the corner of the sofa, bathed in the dim and flickering lights, meditating. Her whole figure was like a lit scented wax, quietly exuding a touch of sadness and loss. The people who usually accompany her to chat on the sofa are me and the youngest partner of the firm, James.

This James is a legend in the Hong Kong legal circle. He went to boarding school in the UK since he was a child. He is a talented student at Oxford University and is recognized as proficient in business. He is one of the two Chinese partners in McQuay Law Firm. James speaks pure English with an upper-class accent, and his English writing is better than those of native British lawyers. In the early 1990s, Hong Kong was still a British colony and the working language was English. The quality of English is often a sign of education level and a stepping stone in the workplace. Although top law firms like McQuay opened branches in Hong Kong in the 1950s, they only promoted two Chinese partners as partners in the late 1980s, and James was one of them. Before the 1980s, Chinese people were suppressed in Hong Kong. For example, the Hong Kong Club only accepted Chinese as members after the 1980s. Such discriminatory treatment is unimaginable for people like me who grew up in New China. I still remember my surprise and outrage when I first heard about this. Why are you so surprised? Hong Kong is a colony under British rule, and the natives in the colony are naturally second-class citizens! In such an environment, it is so hard-won for James to gain a place among the elite kings. However, what I can’t figure out is that James went to school in England when he was nine years old. How did he manage to become fluent in Chinese? James is an approachable person, confident but not arrogant. He has always been courteous and courteous to others, and has an excellent reputation in the firm. Thirty-five years old, he has always been single. Whenever he goes to the office to work overtime, you can see his thin figure.

Chloe and I have an unwritten pact that after a work project, we both feast on Japanese food. We would order Hokkaido sea urchin sushi which I like, grilled snowfish which she likes, and various sashimi which we both like. Chloe also eats like a typical Hong Kong girl: ordering a lot, then pushing the food around in the bowl, and finally eating only a small half. Most of the food went into my stomach amidst laughter and laughter. That day, when I was carefully putting a piece of yellow-orange sea urchin sushi into my mouth, Chloe suddenly said that she went to the court today to change her name. Chloe is her English name, and her Chinese name is Fang Qianwen. She said that she had recently asked a fortune teller to tell her that her name should be changed before getting married, otherwise it would be detrimental to the marriage. As she spoke, her big eyes lit up, full of joy and expectation, and her whole person became unrecognizable to me, which shocked me.

marry? I never heard that she has a boyfriend! After I persisted in questioning, she finally confessed that she had always loved James, but James was too good a person and had a prominent family background, and she was not worthy of him, so she had been silently and unrequitedly in love with him. It wasn't until a few months ago that the two of them met by chance in a restaurant and had dinner and chatted together. Only then did they realize that James also liked her, but because of Chloe's deliberate avoidance, he couldn't be sure of her feelings. After all, the two of them were together. Work is also a superior-subordinate relationship. If you make a mistake in judgment, it will be difficult to work together, so you have to bury your deep feelings deep in your heart.

Wow! This story sounds like watching a movie. I grew up in the Air Force compound. When I was young, my favorite things to do were climbing walls and trees with a group of men, shooting slingshots, riding speedsters, and teasing cats and dogs. When I was twelve years old, I was riding my bicycle down a steep slope when I suddenly saw dark black blood flowing down the beam under my seat. I was so frightened that I cried, thinking I was going to die. My mother explained that girls have this happen once a month, and I learned the difference between girls and boys. I didn't take it seriously even though I knew it. Hidden behind the quiet appearance when he grew up was the rough-hearted nature of a tomboy. Emotionally, if I like a boy, I will tell him straightforwardly, and if he likes me too, I will fall in love with him. If the other person doesn't like me, I won't regret confessing my feelings. I've never had a soft heart and lingering emotions, so when I heard Chloe tell her love story, although I found the twists and turns unbelievable and tiring, I couldn't help but be moved by the deep love these two people had. Touched and sincerely happy for Chloe, her lover finally got married.

Chloe and James' wedding was held at the Four Seasons Hotel in the Maldives. On the vast Indian Ocean, on the white sand beach is an auditorium made of cherry blossoms flown from Japan. Strings play light and romantic music. When the sunset dyes the sky red, the newlyweds step into the hall. They are really talented and beautiful. What a pair of beautiful people that people envy. Not long after the wedding, I left McQuay and joined the Hong Kong office of an American law firm. I was mainly responsible for business in Southeast Asia and traveled to Southeast Asia almost every week. A year later I also got married, and Chloe flew to the United States to attend my wedding. We each have families and don't work together. We all try hard to have lunch every few weeks. A few years later, we all changed jobs and were promoted as our seniority increased. As our responsibilities increased, we had fewer and fewer opportunities to meet each other. But as soon as we meet, we immediately return to being as close as before.

The most common thing we talk about when we meet is vacation. Working as a lawyer in Hong Kong, especially working in an American law firm on Wall Street or a British law firm in the "Magic Circle", the annual salary is generous, usually several million Hong Kong dollars. I usually get off work at nine or ten o'clock in the evening. It's normal to stay up two all-nighters in a row when the project is urgent. It's even more common to work overtime on weekends. The salary is high and the pressure is high. In order to relieve stress, you spend money on things such as Chanel bags, Valentino skirts, Lobotin red-soled high heels, Cartier bracelets, SPA massages at the Oriental Mandarin or Grand Hyatt Hotel, and foreign luxury hotels. Vacation... I have money, but what I lack is time for myself. Originally, you were only in your twenties after graduating from law school, and had neither work experience nor social experience. The company would give you millions. Of course, it rightly required you to be a member of the company, and required that your work should always be given priority in your life. in personal life. Young lawyers exchanged their youth for heavy rewards. With money, the level of consumption becomes increasingly luxurious, so everyone is like a running guinea pig on a spinning wheel, never stopping on this road. So, how to arrange this much cherished twenty-one days of annual leave has become a science.

Chloe’s vacation arrangements always make me envious: exploring the ancient city of Morocco, staying overnight in the Sahara Desert to watch the stars, liveaboard diving in Papua New Guinea, canoeing around Fiji Island, Serenge Watching the great migration of animals, traveling to the Northern Lights in Iceland... James loves photography, and their travel photos are as professional as the covers of travel magazines. After Chloe and I have eaten and talked enough, if we have time, we will go shopping as we did in the old days. Our favorite thing in the past was to buy the latest super sexy lace lingerie at La Perla. Later we also went there, and she would imitate models in various lingerie and make sexy poses. After we laughed for a while, she bought a pack and took it away. But I couldn't arouse the interest to try it.

Every time we meet, I reflect on my life, and I can’t help but lament: I am the mother of two children, the director of a department in the company, and the daughter and daughter-in-law of two elderly people. , is the wife of the man I love who is working hard to realize his career dream. I am no longer a free-spirited, free-spirited and independent woman. My personal life is completely centered around my two children, supervising homework, arranging extracurricular tutoring and countless hobbies and activities. On weekends, I basically go to my friends’ playdates or birthday parties. I changed my hairstyle, but my husband, who was in love with me every night before the wedding, would turn a blind eye. Nowadays, when I am exhausted after a day’s work, I often fall asleep reading to my children. Couples may have sex once a week. Who should I buy sexy underwear to wear? On my vacations, I always go to Disneyland or resorts on the seaside in Southeast Asia that have child-friendly programs.

I don’t know who advocates that women have a balanced career and life, and I don’t know since when society began to expect women to be perfect strong women. Is putting women on such a high pedestal a punishment for daring to step out of the kitchen? Where did the perfect woman come from? It is clearly a difficult situation to get off, and it is difficult to constantly adjust, balance and compromise; it is just a trade-off between putting family first when the children are young and needing their mother the most, and putting career first when the children are older and have more time.

Envy is envy, if I had to live it over again, I would choose to have three children, two of them would be missing! Having children has made my life complete. Being a mother has taught me self-sacrifice, selfless dedication, gratitude to my parents, clear distinction between rewards and punishments, team spirit, charity, and so many other principles of life. I always want to share what I like with good friends. Every time I get together with Chloe, I will earnestly persuade her to change her mind and not give up the opportunity to be a mother. She patiently listens to my nagging every time and then changes her mind. topic. I don’t remember the reason. I haven’t contacted Chloe for a long time. Later, I received a text message from her saying that she quit her job and planned to take a half-year break and go to a temple in India to meditate and climb mountains. Six months later she extended her trip. I was so busy as usual that I forgot about her return journey, until one day I suddenly received a call from her. She finally returned to Hong Kong. She missed her very much and asked me to have dinner.

Walking into the Japanese restaurant on the second floor of Shangri-La Hotel, as soon as I looked in, I saw Chloe sitting at the window looking at the busy harbor in the distance. She wore a little black dress, a pair of red bottom and black tops, and no other jewelry except a pair of long diamond earrings. Her long hair flowed down her right shoulder, covering half of her face. Maybe it's been too long, she looks a little different. After hugging and sitting down, we looked at each other. I said she shouldn't wear a black skirt because it would make her look even thinner. She said that heavy eyeliner is not suitable for me at my age because it will make my eyes look tired. After saying that, we both couldn't help but smile. What kind of friends are these? Be picky about each other! After ordering my meal, I hurriedly took out two doctors' business cards. My good friend, who had been unsuccessfully trying to have a baby recently, finally became pregnant with her first child at the age of 40. Her strategy was to first see a well-known Chinese medicine doctor to recuperate her body, and then go to a Western medicine specialist for IVF. Chloe took the business card and looked at it carefully for a while, then suddenly she covered her face with her hands and cried. I was stunned for a moment and immediately regretted it. I was too abrupt. Why didn't I pick up which pot? Maybe her childhood situation made her not want children, maybe James's sperm was not active enough, maybe her uterus was infertile... I immediately held her hand and said I was sorry.

After a few minutes, she calmed down, her eyes lowered, and she slowly told me that the reason she had no children was because she and James had never had a sexual relationship. After hearing this, I almost fell off my chair! How is this possible? ! She ignored my surprise and didn't even raise her head to look at me. She held the steaming tea cup with both hands and continued calmly: Two people kissed and touched, but there was no sex according to the traditional definition. When it was time to go to bed every day, James would find various excuses to avoid or leave the bedroom, not to have sex with her anyway. Over the years, she gradually lost her self-confidence, thinking that she had no feminine charm, that her breasts were too small, that her skin might be too rough and annoying, and even suspected that her body had a peculiar smell... She had tried to have a heart-to-heart relationship with James many times. When talking about it, James would either joke about it lightly or treat it coldly without saying a word. Her crying or making noises won't get a positive response from him, but he will "compensate" her in other ways. He bought several properties under her name; on her birthday or Valentine's Day, he would send a bouquet of the most expensive flowers to her office; on New Year's Eve and New Year's Eve, he would always carefully select gifts for her; he showed his meticulous care and concern for her mother. She took care of her two younger brothers as if they were her own brothers. The two of them eat, read, chat, and travel together. They are best friends and love and care for each other like brothers and sisters. Only sex is a forbidden area between them. I said that he must have a woman outside, but Chloe said that after years of observation, there shouldn't be. I said there was a man out there, but Chloe said she wasn't sure. The low self-esteem she had developed over the years often caused her to suffer from insomnia and had to see a psychiatrist for a long time. I asked her why she didn't divorce, and she said that she had always held on to the illusion that he would change, and she didn't have the courage to face a failed marriage, let alone explain it to her family...

She finally raised her head and looked at me Her eyes said that she was now in love with another man. While mountaineering in India, she fell in love with Dorje, a Tibetan young man in his early twenties who had accompanied her to climb the Himalayas for several months and was fifteen years younger than her. In the arms of this tall, sunny and passionate young man, Chloe found the feeling and confidence of being a woman for the first time, and experienced the passion and attachment of love. This is true, complete, true love, a woman's love for a man. For this love, she has decided to get out of her marriage, move to Paris with Dorje, and start a new life there. She is preparing to fulfill her dream of studying for a master's degree in French literature, and at the same time, she will support Duoji in four years of college and help him find a job he likes. I asked her if she would marry Duoji? She said she would not ask Dorje like this, but she hoped to be pregnant with his child. She said that there was a big age difference after all, and she was mentally prepared that one day when she was old and Duoji was in his prime, Duoji might fall in love with someone else.

She said that even so, she had no regrets.

Chloe left Hong Kong and stopped contacting me. I tried to inquire about her in many ways but couldn't find any information. Later I thought about it and realized that she was a very private and strong person. When she left, she wanted to say goodbye to her past life, including her relatives and friends. I should help her.

December 2021 in Orange County, California