Why do parents in Suzhou insist that their children marry locals?

I am the mother of Suzhou, so tell me the truth. From the time my child came of age, I instilled the idea that local people must find local people. There is no discrimination against foreigners. Many foreign sons-in-law and foreign daughters-in-law are also excellent and filial, but we dare not. The folk customs and humanities in different regions are really different.

Take my own marriage as an example, and find a man whose parents are Su Beiren who was born and settled in Suzhou. There is an old saying in old Suzhou, don't look for people in Jiangbei, just grab shit and throw mud. I'm not worldly, and I don't believe in this evil. The facts are in front of me. Suzhou traditional folk men can't hit women, men can't scold other women, and they won't scold in front of their elders. Etiquette, the traditional Suzhou people, even if they were born in a peasant family, were brought up by their parents. They are not allowed to shake their legs when eating, and girls are not allowed to cross their legs when sitting down. Say hello to your elders and neighbors. Hygienic habits regardless of gender, you must wash your face, feet and ass every night. The way of the old Suzhou people is that you give me a foot and I will give you a foot back. Be a well-behaved and polite person. But some new Suzhou people, even after spending half their lives in Suzhou, are still selfish at heart. Gluttony, laziness, no health concept, no culture, love swearing, no sense of family responsibility. It is considered a man's skill to hit people and swear in public, and it is never a shameful thing.

Therefore, unless our children in Suzhou find foreign classmates in universities or fall in love freely at work, they can basically find local marriages if they can find local ones. At least the cognition of folk customs is the same. Our Suzhou people's evaluation of some foreigners is that turning your face is faster than turning pages, and it is merciless. Just pull out the locals to facilitate communication.

Suzhou people look for objects, paying attention to whether human nature is in tune. As long as the conditions are similar. We are afraid of the atrocities of some foreigners. Suzhou is a gentle city, and I don't like it very much. So do folk customs and marriage views.

I am a parent in Suzhou. Many families' children are studying abroad, and parents are most worried about bringing their boyfriends and girlfriends back from other places.

They don't want their children to find lovers from other places for the following reasons.

There are two marriages in Suzhou now. The second marriage means that men don't marry women, and the children of the two families get married. This advantage is that the man does not need bride price money. After the two families get married, the young couple can eat and live on both sides, and the expenses are paid by both parents, which not only reduces the economic burden of the younger generation, but also reduces the economic pressure of their parents.

After the two families get married, the house can be rented except for the one they live in, so the pressure of life will be less.

Find a daughter-in-law from a different place, and you will need hundreds of thousands of bride price money if you don't bring the house. This is a huge gap between going out and going in, which will eventually affect the quality of life.

A family nearby sold a suite in order to marry a daughter-in-law from a different place, because the woman asked for more than 200 thousand bride price and bought a car. This family used to have three suites, but only two suites were left after selling one. The second house happens to be occupied by the second generation, and all the surrounding families have houses for rent. Her family has no house to rent, and with hundreds of thousands of bride price, life is under great pressure. This is why many people don't want their children to marry foreign wives.

If you find a foreign son-in-law, parents are afraid that the foreign son-in-law will bully their daughter, because in their impression, foreign men have a bigger temper than local men in Suzhou and are not easy to serve.

Economically, there are always several demolished houses in local men's homes. If foreign boys don't buy a house, their living conditions will be worse than others, which is a concern of many parents.

Everyone wants to live a better life, so these parents' worries are understandable.

I often hear from my former colleagues that my daughter has found a boy who is far away in Suzhou, and she is very annoyed.

My colleague's family has good economic conditions, and her daughter is slim and graceful. During her study, she met a man from a different place. She disobeyed her parents' advice and married that man.

Because the man's parents' home is far from Suzhou, now his daughter's children and housework are done by colleagues. When she is tired, she will blame her daughter for finding the wrong person. She often envies that two married families can take turns to take care of their children.

In order to bring two families from different backgrounds closer together, her family spent millions to buy a house in Suzhou, saying that the man's parents would move in, so that the two children could be taken care of by both parents in turn.

The house has been bought, and it is not known whether the man's parents will move here.

Nowadays, children grow up in the hands of adults, and it really takes a lot of effort to raise older children, so these parents' considerations are understandable.

Many parents say that their children are looking for a partner locally, where the other person lives, the personality of the other parent and the other person's family background are very clear. Such a marriage, as a parent, is reassuring and reassuring.

If you find someone from a different place, many things are unclear and you can't inquire, so you feel insecure.

Long-distance love and long-distance love are the same thing. It's all a gamble, and it's all about taking certain risks. Parents don't want their children to find partners in different places, and they are not willing to take this risk.

When you are in love, whether you are looking for a different place or a local place, there are many people who are better than the locals, and the locals are better than the locals. Respect everyone's choice.

Whether you choose long-distance love or local love, everyone's choice and consideration are different, which has nothing to do with right or wrong.

The main advantage of marrying a local is that both of them are only children and their parents are around. Later, they gave birth to a child, and four old people helped to take care of it. Don't worry about no house. No matter how poor the local people are, there will always be a house that they live in. Usually two or three suites. Parents in Suzhou are also more open-minded and reasonable, and it is much easier to get along with them. In short, it is right to listen to the old man, and parents will not lie to you.

This is the same as the parents of Beijing girls demanding that Beijing girls can only marry Beijingers.

Hukou in developed cities is a valuable resource, and resources are used for complementary exchange. If the conditions of boys from other places in Suzhou are not particularly excellent, the woman's parents may feel cheated.

This question is easy to answer. Who can eat such awful sweet things outside Suzhou? Everyone can accept the sweetness of Wuxi. Anyway, I'm not used to the sweetness of Suzhou. Shanghai is not used to Hangzhou and Nanjing, so it is a bit uncomfortable to marry a Suzhou girl. Daughter, born in Hangzhou and living in Suzhou for several years, I quickly dragged her to Nanjing. I can't get used to her favorite dishes, and her mother is from Jiangxi, so can I. Leaving Liangjiang New Area is even more troublesome.

This is not necessarily true. For example, I recruited a young man from other places and gave him a house. Now they have a good life. In addition, many young men in our village have become door-to-door sons-in-law. Most of them live well, only a few are not satisfactory. Two of them had car accidents, and two of them broke up because of investment failure. However, these things are hard to avoid even for locals.

Wuxi is the same. Suzhou and Wuxi have many similarities. Most parents in Wuxi also want their daughters to marry local boys.