Classic joking quotations

1. Don’t be discouraged when you encounter setbacks, work hard and don’t let go, strive to be strong and strong, avoid being upset and don’t get angry, be optimistic and live a happy life, don’t be discouraged in places with many people

2. Women are willing to accept a man’s pursuit because it “feels” good, and only by continuing to feel good can a woman decide on a relationship. Once the good feeling stops, so does the relationship. ——A woman's loyalty begins with a lifelong commitment to each other and ends with despair.

3. In order to thank my friends for their love, we now provide a weekend one-day trip, with a full round trip by bus. The activities include cleaning the floor and kitchen oil stains in my house, scrubbing the toilet, washing clothes and bedding, and providing lunch for 210 people. , sign up as soon as possible!

4. Plan to buy tickets in advance so that you have enough time and peace of mind. It is suitable to buy tickets for major stations. You can get off in advance and you can calculate the difference. To improve efficiency, telephone, Internet and station. Save yourself the trouble and sweat, get your tickets early and have an early reunion.

5. Integrate the curiosity of childhood and the enterprising spirit of youth into the youth full of passion, so that youth will have no regrets and move forward brilliantly! 812 International Youth Day is your holiday. I wish you eternal youth and happiness from your heart!

6. 318 I wish you: wear the clothes of fortune, walk on the road of good fortune, carry the gold bag, sit in the silver car, drive into the Jubao Mountain, and obtain great wealth; 318 If you want to make money, I wish you have so much money that your eyes will be dazzled and your hands will be numb counting the money!

7. Dude, you dance the Gangnam style very well and happily, but don’t swing your head too much, okay? It's all water. I'm afraid you can't control it well and the water will burst. Haha.

8. The earth is windy and the sun is smiling, the auspicious stars are shining high and the house is full of blessings, and the spring is full of colors. Everything goes well and there is no worry. I want to send it on March 18th, and I send you a blessing text message. I also send you blessings and good luck. Heart-warming and heart-warming.

9. The high temperature has not subsided recently, and I suffer from the heat every day. Pay attention to cherishing yourself, don’t work too hard, eat more fruits during the day, and go to bed calmly at night. Don’t be anxious or angry when something happens. Nourish your heart and protect your lungs. , you and I are close friends, the above reminders are free!

10. A pair of fly mother and son were having a meal. The son frowned and asked his mother: "Mom, why do we eat poop every day?" The mother said: "Don't say such disgusting words while eating, hurry up Eat it while it’s hot! ”

11. If you want to give it away on March 18th, you won’t be able to take away the gold and silver. Pearls and emeralds will be scattered all over the floor, and the God of Wealth will praise you when he sees it (next88). I wish you a happy family, a happy and good mood, and a prosperous career!

12. Pig hunting notice: I lost a purebred white pig. Characteristics: Smart and considerate, he carries a mobile phone and checks text messages. After reading the message, the pig will reply to the owner quickly! Master misses you so much now!

13. When I was poor, you were by my side; when I was sick and injured, you were by my side; when I was frustrated in love, you were by my side... …I’m so unlucky to be with you.

14. You and I are both single-winged angels. Only by embracing each other can we spread our wings and fly. It is said that people come to the world to find their other half. I finally found you after all the hard work, but I found that Our wings are parallel to each other.

15. Ignorance and little knowledge are terrible things and situations. It makes people self-righteous and self-knowledge, and the result is clumsiness and mistakes; what is even more terrible is ignorance and little knowledge.

16. As the saying goes: An inch of time is worth an inch of gold; but as the saying goes: An inch of gold cannot buy an inch of time! Life is short and passers-by are in a hurry. I advise you not to cherish your gold-threaded clothes. I advise you to cherish your youth. I advise you not to be greedy. I advise you to cherish the people in front of you.

17. 318 Fafafa, I wish you, on this beautiful day, auspicious light from the south, wealth from the north, purple energy from the east and blessings from the west, happiness when you go out, and wealth when you return.

18. The financial tsunami caused minor injuries to the United States, serious injuries to Europe, and internal injuries to China.

19. Are you asleep? I will send mosquitoes to bite you; do you want to eat well? I send flies to annoy you; have you forgotten me? I asked the bees to burrow into your belly. Bajie, when you come back from Buddhist scriptures, you have to contact me frequently, otherwise, don’t blame senior brother for disturbing you again!

20. I held you that night and told you to put on that thing in your ear. You said it felt good not to wear it. Now is the safety period. It’s okay... but the traffic police will arrest you if you don’t wear a helmet. What to do.

21. Come home and look forward to the New Year. Buying tickets for the Spring Festival is troublesome. You are tired of queuing up to buy tickets. You feel anxious. It is really difficult to buy tickets. You can’t bear it. I wish you the best. Buy your tickets as soon as possible and go home to celebrate the New Year together.

22. Girls are more valuable, but women are more valuable. If a rich woman is around, both can be thrown away.

23. You always say that your boyfriend is handsome and rich. He looks rich and looks like a front line. He has bifurcated bifurcation when he urinates. Go and get it cured!

24. The latest definition of tourism: It is to go from a place that you are tired of to a place that others are tired of.

25. These days, my son has to do his homework until 11 o'clock before going to bed. This is how the flowers of the motherland are crippled!

26. Many girls got Han Hong’s disease, but they did not die.

27. Confessions of a ticket: I have always said that I am hard to find, but in fact it is because of the concentration of suitors that I am confused and don’t know who to marry. No, if you get out of the way, I will be in front of you affectionately. Wish you win me to your home soon!

28. No matter how strict the traffic regulations are, I am not afraid. I will never take a driver's license test in my life. I will be so angry with you monsters who work behind closed doors.

29. 318 Please do a good job in reception. The God of Wealth will come to your home today and decide to stay there forever and never leave. I wish you lots of money!

30. It will be sent out on March 18th. Send a text message to say hello. Good luck will be the first to arrive. May you laugh with your happy mood. Have a happy life and be happy everywhere. May lots of money come in. Best wishes. A happy life will always follow you, and your career will be prosperous every step of the way.

31. International Youth Day, let us dance, make you happy, burn your youth, and let your *** overflow in the wonderful years. Work hard, my friend, and have fun, young talents. them.

32. You 1 turned around and scared a row of teaching buildings. You 2 turned around and the landslides and ground cracked and water flowed backwards. You 3 turned around and Halley's Comet hit the earth. You 4 turned around and Yao Ming switched to playing table tennis.

33. If I give you a piece of Sachima, happiness will use you as a target; if I give you a piece of soft bread, your troubles will disappear; if I give you a cup of orange, happiness will knock on your door every day and give it to you. A glass of wine and good luck being your watchdog!

34. When I met God that day, he promised me a wish. I said I hoped for world peace, but he said it was too difficult to handle. I took out your photo and hoped that He would make you more beautiful. God took your photo and said, "Take the globe and let me take a look."

35. People who are immersed in romantic love all day long are worthless, because a man’s achievements come from the development of his career and the improvement of his social status, rather than relying on his partner! As for feelings, they only eliminate one's loneliness.

36. A: How have you been during the Spring Festival holidays? B: I had a very fulfilling life. I have been queuing up to buy tickets for the past seven days. In the end, I didn’t know what the tickets were like, so I stopped coming to work. A:...

37. It is important to prepare for a rainy day, but it is a pity that without Zhuge's talent, I still lament that it is difficult to buy tickets, which is so sad. People like this must first work hard to buy tickets and strengthen their bodies before they can stand out in the crowd and come out on top!

38. There is no one in the world who is more greedy than you. You have eaten all the money I earned in exchange for my hard work, day and night treks. You are such a lazy guy who just wants to enjoy yourself! The feet speak to the mouth.

39. When someone is pretending to be cool, I will lower my head. It’s not that I’m well-educated, I’m just looking for bricks.

40. I study on purpose, work on purpose, live on purpose, and live like a human being on purpose!

41. The scorching heat comes every year. Holding a fan and asking the sky, why is the temperature so high this summer? To prevent heatstroke, take more leisure time and stay calm. People have joys and sorrows, and the sky has four seasons: hot and cold. This is a difficult thing in ancient times. I wish you good friends and happy years!

42. Recruitment advertisement: Recruiting people to buy train tickets on behalf of others. Requirements: tall, sharp eyes, able to endure hardships, quick movements, able to withstand hunger and thirst, able to identify genuine and counterfeit tickets, interested parties Please contact: Mr. Missing Tickets!

43. Maybe with a little effort, my children will become the second generation of rich people in the future. This situation is really not good for the growth of my children, so I have to give up my efforts.

44. I was born in the year of cucumber, so I don’t want to be photographed! Those born in the zodiac of walnut the day after tomorrow need a beating! Those who live their whole lives as bad motorcycles deserve to be kicked! If you find a wife who is a screw, she needs to be screwed!

45. I miss you with the most beautiful mood, recall you with the sweetest smile, look at you with the purest eyes, and bless you with the most sincere heart. And then, and then. I will knock you unconscious with the biggest stone. Who made you forget to send me a text message?

46. Fujian was rated as the province with the lowest laugh rate in the country, just because the local people faced the scorching sun and unanimously shouted: I am so happy (hot) that it kills me...

47. When I get old, I have one wish, which is to be by your side every day. I will go wherever you go. I go out in the morning and go home at night. While I am leisurely, you also take care of food and clothing. I have decided to go there when I get old. Herding sheep.

48. Only expectations that can be met are worth looking forward to; expectations that can be realized are valuable.

49. Men always regard women’s complaints as dissatisfaction with their own shortcomings, thinking that as long as these shortcomings are corrected, the problem can be solved and the relationship will not be affected. ——But often women’s complaints are just to remind men of what they have not done yet, rather than asking for changes.

50. You are happy because I am happy, I am happy because you are happy, I am sad because you have lost weight, I have lost weight because you are sick, I laugh because you are strong, and I am rich because Sold you... pig!

51. 318 If you want to make a fortune, congratulations on your wealth. The God of Wealth will come to your door every day. Your career will be prosperous. He will pave the road with gold and give you a money tree. With a shake of the tree, gold coins will fall from the tree. When it fell, you started to laugh. I wish you a happy smile every day.

52. Women’s naivety lies in thinking that dressing themselves up like wildflowers will prevent men from picking wildflowers. In fact, sometimes men’s dislike of the old is not because they really want to start a new business, but because they want to prove that they still have others. .

53. International Youth Day, come and receive the holiday blessings. Receive a banner and say youth is priceless. Receive two red flowers and say smile is like a flower. Receive a call from Sanchawu. If you can’t answer it, I can’t bear to hear your news. Have a happy holiday!

54. As the saying goes: If someone offends me, I will offend him; as the saying goes: endure the calm for a while, and take a step back to open up the sea and the sky. As long as it is not a matter of principle, you should think more about others, and this society will be more harmonious!

55. Son: Mom, you said that grandma went to the vegetable market and bought a chicken. After Le Diandian came back, she went to buy another one. For (feed) what? The son replied: Wrong, just feed him food.

56. So women are often disappointed that men cannot put her first. Second to career, sometimes second to friends; and men can't stand women asking him to prove that he loves her all day long.

57. According to your birth date, you will definitely make a fortune in the near future. Please follow the tips immediately: get an explosive hairstyle, wear patched clothes, hold a stick in your right hand and a bowl in your left hand, walk along the street and Spell: OK, OK!

58. This is the most beautiful suit in the world, with a coat made of dollars, buttons made of gold, trousers made of renminbi, a cloak made of euros, and a hat made of pounds. Shoes carved from beautiful jade, 318 wants to show off, please wear them, you will be the most beautiful person in the world.

59. What to do if you are thirsty? Go to the beach for a walk; what should you do if you are hungry? Let’s have hot pot and shabu-shabu; what to do if you don’t have money? Find a fool to lie to you; what should you do if you don’t have the guts? Go to the cemetery to practice; what if I miss you? So send a text message and give it a try.

60. When you think you have nothing, at least you still have time. Time can heal all wounds, so please don’t cry.

61. As the saying goes: The Tao is one foot high, and the devil is one foot high. But as the saying goes: evil will not prevail against good! In fact, good and evil are only between thoughts. I hope my friends will choose justice and stay away from evil!

62. Time is a cruel butcher's knife. It can make something originally beautiful become ugly, and something originally ugly become unsightly!

63. I have eight honors on the left and eight shames on the right. They are represented on the waist, and harmony is on the chest. People who stand in the way kill people, and Buddhas who stand in the way kill Buddha!

64. In this Olympics, China’s weightlifting declined, while swimming rose. This reflects that there are fewer people moving bricks in China, and there are more rich and handsome people swimming. In addition, it can be seen that North Koreans are moving more bricks, and it is visually expected to be reformed and opened up...

65. Next time I meet you, I will definitely pull you to the bedroom, lock the door, and quickly push you onto the bed. , covering my head with the quilt, stretching out my big hand... You see, my mobile phone has a blue screen.

66. Gently, the wind is blowing; moistly, friendship is nourishing; gorgeously, flowers are blooming; thickly, friendship is sublimating; truly, thoughts are flying. ; Warmly, my friend is sending greetings: May you be happy and worry-free! The weather is changing, take care of yourself!

67. As the saying goes: People are like water, which can carry a boat. As the saying goes, people are like water and can capsize a boat. Although the people are ordinary, their power is infinite. Society cannot do without us. Friends make us full of confidence and enjoy this happy and beautiful life!

68. On the bus, a young man stepped on an old man. The old man turned his head and glanced at the young man. The young man said disdainfully: "What are you looking at? Did you step on it and you still dare to eat me?" The old man said calmly: "Don't dare, I am a Hui believer."

69. I must make you the second happiest person in the world - because with you, I am already the happiest person!

70. Women’s tears are useless liquid, but if you make a woman cry, it means you are useless.

71. International Youth Day is here. I wish you continuous good luck, continuous joy, and may happiness always be with you. I wish you success in your work, success in your career, and prosperity. I wish you good teeth, good appetite, good health, and delicious food.

72. Thank you for being willing to listen to my complaints, because with you, I can get rid of all my unhappiness! Thank you for every minute and second you have walked with me. Because of you, my life is no longer lonely! Wangcai, I can no longer live without you in my life.

73. Beauties come in droves, money follows you, the boss takes care of you, the police avoid you when they see you, everything can be settled, everyone smiles at you, and your life is so beautiful. Wake up quickly, I told you not to take a nap, you are daydreaming again.