Inspirational joke sentences

1, the first part: I rest late after work, take a vacation late, my salary is low, and I am tired like a dog. Bottom line: Go to work early, be on duty early, start work early, eat more like a pig. Horizontal approval: unparalleled work

2. When a company recruits, the interviewer asks, "Do you have leadership and organizational skills?" Interviewer: "I have organized several strikes. I don't know if this counts. "

3. Manager: Have you finished eating? Me: Guess Manager: Guess, guess, guess? Me: Guess what? Guess what? Manager: This is the workplace. Please pay attention to your language.

4. Sitting in the office, a pile of documents and materials; When you meet a leader's camel, do it in front of your subordinates; Too busy to lose myself, and occasionally anxious to get angry-all because of life!

My colleagues are very happy when my salary is paid. Xiao Li was annoyed: "How did the bonus get deducted? Life has deceived me. " A colleague said, "Then you can cheat life."

6. In order to support you, I get up from work at five o'clock, work hard, and my boss is satisfied; In order to earn more money, overtime has become a common practice, and Dai Yue, the star, went home to count money and look at smiling faces.

7. The boss glanced at the volunteer report and was furious: "Why is there nothing I want to hear?" The employee replied, "I'm not a fortune teller on the overpass, so there are always so many delicious foods."

8, high-precision instrument company, the purpose of the workplace is "late for work, sleep at work, always decadent at work, hey! Exit the meeting. Go to work early, go to work well, and have high enthusiasm for work, huh! Increase the cost. "

9. Xiao Li is complaining that I have to work overtime after Sun's father gets off work! God said, "Then trade with him." Xiao Li is very happy. As a result, God said, "Come to work at six tomorrow morning."

10, we are all busy, we have to work, we have to be lazy, we have to manage people, we have to be managed, we have to be loved, and we have a crush on others. We are all small people and don't need too much happiness.

1 1, the head can be broken and the blood can flow. You can't lose overtime on weekends. Five plus two, white plus black, quite a lot of working hours. I never care about working more and earning less. Who is he? An indomitable 250-person unit.

12, dormitory is like heaven, factory is like hell. Go to hell every morning and go back to heaven at night. I went out of heaven, stayed away from hell on weekends, and didn't know I was in Xanadu until I walked into the street. Have a nice weekend!

13, live, live, live, do more and more, the boss urges you to hurry up, you talk too much. If you want to laugh in the workplace, the boss should coax you. If you want to succeed in the workplace, clear your mind before it is too late. It's moonlight today, so don't say anything.

14, the workplace is like a battlefield. It is very important to learn the art of war: if the boss doesn't move, you move first. You should make an empty plan in your spare time, admit your mistakes, plan ahead, and don't stay 36 days after work.

15, tired from work, waiting in line for dinner, but the salary has not doubled. My lover is not in place yet. I don't want to wake up in the morning and I want to sleep at night. I don't care about these, the most unbearable thing is to wish you happiness and charge!

16, the sky is gray, Ding, get up and go to work. Wash your face and brush your teeth, and wash early after eating. It's not difficult. You have to work hard. Life is hard. As a daughter-in-law and a child, I will work overtime.

17, life is so charming that countless office workers bend over. The salary can't be paid at the end of the month, and life is quite shabby. It is not good to find a girlfriend, and it is not good to have no money. Laugh when you see a text message. A good mood is the most important thing.

18, Xiao Li works overtime every day, and the result is very distressing. The boss said, "Xiao Li works overtime today and will give you a day off tomorrow." Xiao Li was so happy that he didn't know he had been cheated until he read the calendar at home. Tomorrow is Saturday.

19. Be "sexy" in the workplace: leaders will appreciate excellent work; Know how to look at your face so that you won't step on the minefield by mistake; People will remember it only if it has characteristics; Only by playing a good role can it be smooth sailing. May you become more and more sexy.

20. [Water adjustment]. Workplace]: When will the salary be raised? Ask the supervisor with a gift. I wonder how many years it will take to get a property. I want to find a job-hopping, but I'm afraid my salary is low, which is even worse. I can't work here on steamed bread and porridge!

2 1, choosing a job, just like choosing a daughter-in-law, Xiao Li voted for his favorite company. The personnel manager of that company, surnamed Chen, quickly wrote a "Don't disturb Chen" tender. Xiao Li was eclipsed when he got it. His father is not surnamed Chen. . . . . .

22, the east wind blows, the drums beat, and now who is afraid of who in the workplace; Tiger wolf comes out, cunning rabbit hides, work and play hide and seek; As soon as the enemy enters, we will retreat and guerrilla warfare will defeat the proprietress! I wish my friends more brains and less efforts, and go to work easily and no longer busy!

23, the secret of the workplace: to be promoted, you have to learn parrots, be a good leader's mouthpiece, magpies serve the country, and report good news without reporting worries is the criterion. When something happens, you have to learn squid, muddy the water to get out, and learn spiders, and make detours again and again.

24. No matter how dark the night is, it will usher in the dawn. No matter how long the ups and downs are, there will be a smooth road. With a heart of hope that never gives up, there will be warm sunshine and rain and dew tomorrow. Hang in there, my friend, victory is your next step!

25, so bright at the foot of my bed, I got up quickly and glanced at my watch. It was still early, so I went back to bed and couldn't sleep anymore. I went to work in the morning, my eyes were sleepy, my data was zero, and my salary was deducted. A lesson from the past is a lesson from the future.

26. Alternative workplace law. Three laws of promotion: either endure! Either hard! Or get out! Obey the three laws: obey the boss, obey the money and obey the rules; Three laws of success: first, we must persist; Second, shameless; Third, we must persist in shameless!

27. You are a white-collar worker, you are the backbone and you are the elite, so you are the legendary white. If you mix well in vain, you must be versatile and proficient in eating, drinking and having fun. Uh-huh ... white is not easy to mix.

28. If life is a cigarette, then work is a cigarette end, time is soot, and you are the cigarette. Although it is the essence of smoking, it is eager for appreciation or salary increase after all. Let's wait until there is no nicotine in the cigarette one day!

29, the boss that's uncle, discipline that's Platini, can't afford to offend, can only provide, task that's rice bowl, time that's life, so we have to be steady, work that's life, workplace that's life, so we have to get used to it, work overtime today, or take the initiative!

30. When my brother came for the first time, I wouldn't miss such a good place when I passed by. I think people came to see my brother in those days. Now the reform and opening up, even people's feelings have changed. At that time, they did everything for their brothers. Now, they do everything for their wives.

3 1, hard work, tired work, will soon be exhausted by work. The boss won't let me leave early. Dream of doubling your salary several times, but earn a little hard. I am always tired at home and abroad, but my wife calls me a loser. I said I was unlucky. Dreams and facts are always relative. Looks like happiness is right!

32. Xiao Wang is beautiful but has no object. The leader wants to introduce his brother to her. Xiao Wang asked, "Is he your brother or younger brother?" The leader asked inexplicably, "Is there a difference?" Xiao Wang replied: "if only your brother, then you can call me sister-in-law!" " "

33. If you don't work, life is there. No matter whether you increase or decrease, whether you complain or not, the salary is there. No matter how much or how little, whether you are happy or not, the boss is there. Like it or not, life is like this. Talk about work and relax!

34, yes or no, overtime is necessary, because it's called work, you can't catch up, the time is fixed, because it's called task, you are happy or not, everything is necessary, because you want to live, you don't care if you take time off, it doesn't matter, anyway, you have no money to take time off!

35. If you work hard and tired, you will soon be exhausted by work. The boss won't let me leave early. Dream of doubling your salary several times, but earn a little hard. I am always tired at home and abroad, but my wife calls me a loser. I said I was unlucky. Dreams and facts are always opposites. I hope you are not too tired. It doesn't matter how much money you earn. Easy work is right!

36. An employee suggested to the leader that more beautiful female employees should be recruited. The reasons are as follows: after recruiting beautiful employees, employees' work enthusiasm will be greatly improved, their satisfaction with the company will be improved, team spirit will be strengthened, work creativity will be increased, the phenomenon of being late and leaving early will be improved, the attendance rate will be greatly improved, and the working atmosphere will be active.

37. Everyone in this unit is equipped with a computer. Lao Liu is over 40 years old and knows nothing about computers. Let his stuttering colleague Xiao Wang teach typing. Xiao Wang used the intelligent pinyin input method for the first time to teach for a long time and felt uncomfortable. He wanted to use the input method instead, and said to Liu, Liu, the dog was stunned and asked angrily, Why did you curse?

38. Going to work is boring, and it feels like being in prison. The leader is the guard, and you and I are prisoners. It's even more boring after work. The salary is only enough to eat, but there is no money for entertainment. In the evening, I have to stay at home and watch TV and surf the Internet. Only then did I understand what it means to be unable to move without money. After thinking about it, it is better to go to work, work to kill time and get paid; The leader protects you for your own good and won't let you have nothing to do and make trouble in the streets.

39. My brother-in-law got off work in the middle of the night and went home to eat a bowl of instant noodles. Suddenly he felt dizzy and his lips turned pale. I rushed him to the hospital. The doctor yawned and asked, how many months has it been? Brother-in-law: I'm just sick. Doctor: Do you have a stomachache? Brother-in-law: No pain. The doctor listened everywhere with a stethoscope, prescribed a prescription and said, nothing, take some medicine, and it will be safe after eating. I took the prescription and looked at it: Name: xxx Gender: Female. I feel dizzy.

40. Pony: "So busy, why doesn't Master Wang come down to help?" Niu Lao: "In the past, he was both a worker and a cadre, and he was very busy." Pony: "Why aren't you busy now? Occasionally you act like a gentleman, and you don't do it. " Niu Lao: "You don't understand. In the past, leaders were also called "cadres", which was the work of directors. Now, it is called management, and of course there is no need for a director. " Pony: "That's right. I hope our workers can change their names. "