How to cultivate children's optimism

An optimistic person can face the reality bravely and pursue success. Optimistic mood and attitude have a positive impact on people's behavior, and optimistic attitude can be cultivated. Therefore, in the process of education, we should do the following: praise children for seeking truth from facts; Think of the right way before criticizing children; Appropriate use of psychological suggestion; Teachers should set an example; Carry out mental health education for students.

Keywords: optimism; Cultivation; Psychological suggestion; Mental health education

China Library Classification Number: G62 1 Document Identification Number: A Document Number:1002-7661(201) 03-0084-2.

Scientists used experiments to investigate the effects of happy and unhappy emotions on homework. The experimenter divided the subjects into two groups and asked them to solve some homework problems. Some of these homework problems have solutions and some have no solutions. After that, let the first group of subjects imagine a successful speech to make them happy, and let the second group of subjects imagine a failed speech to make them unhappy. Then two groups of subjects were asked to recall the contents of their homework. The results show that in the successful state, they recall more homework for unanswered homework questions, while in the failed state, they recall more homework for answered homework questions. It can be seen that a good mood can make people face failure more actively and constantly find solutions. People in a bad mood may always avoid failure because of the need to balance their psychology.

Psychologically speaking, emotion is a relatively persistent and weak emotional state that affects people's whole psychological activities. It is diffuse, that is, when emotions occur, people and things carry this emotional state and will spread and spread. For example, a happy mood seems to dye everything with a "happy color", while a melancholy heart will make people unhappy on any occasion. There are many factors that affect mood, including natural factors, such as weather, but more importantly, social factors. For a student, a parent's eyes, a teacher's action, and a classmate's words may determine his mood this day, and then affect his learning state this day. However, the same situation has different effects on people with different personalities. Optimistic people can get rid of the interference of bad emotions as soon as possible, and always or at least keep a good mood most of the time, which has a positive impact on their work and study. Therefore, as teachers, we should carefully observe, actively guide, strive to create a positive atmosphere, and cultivate students' optimistic and cheerful personality.

The previous experiments show that optimistic people can face the reality bravely and face failure. He regards failure as a temporary phenomenon that can be changed through hard work, and actively seeks new ways to solve problems, thus moving towards new success. An optimistic person can make it easier for him to bear the pressure of life and inspire people around him with his optimistic spirit, so as to win the sincere love of others and establish good interpersonal relationships for himself. Psychologists advise insurance companies to hire people with high optimism. All of them were eliminated by traditional recruitment, and their performance was 20% higher than others in the first year and 50% higher in the second year. Pessimists are just the opposite. His life seems to be a dead end everywhere, and others don't want to look gloomy all day. Lin Daiyu's character can only be appreciated in classical novels. Although there are innate genetic factors in the formation of optimistic and pessimistic personalities, they can also be cultivated, because the biggest difference between them is the explanation of the reasons for favorable and unfavorable events, which is a thinking habit and can be formed through training. Optimists believe that favorable and pleasant things are always permanent (that is, they can happen constantly) and universal (that is, they can happen anytime and anywhere), and they can try their best to make good things happen. Once an adverse event occurs, they will also regard it as temporary and take an optimistic and realistic attitude towards the reasons. Pessimists, on the other hand, believe that good things are always temporary, and bad things are forever only by luck. When explaining the reasons for bad things or blaming yourself for everything, you gradually become self-pitying and unable to extricate yourself; Or they all appointed too many others and became irresponsible. Just like exam results, optimistic children will accept and actively analyze the reasons for wrong questions in order to correct them. Pessimistic children or think: it's all my fault that I'm too stupid to do such a simple problem well. I can't learn well anyway. Or think: it's all because the topic is too difficult. If only it were simpler. As a result, I didn't read the question correctly at all, and the meaning of the exam lost half. In fact, if you think about it carefully, this view is instilled by teachers and parents. If teachers or parents only pay attention to grades without guiding students to find reasons and make positive corrections, it is easy to happen. After such a long time, the result can be imagined. To say the least, what's the point of such a life, even if he improves his grades under pressure and lives in fear or resentment all day? Moreover, such students are easy to form an obstacle personality, which is unfavorable to individuals and society. Since we know that we can form an optimistic personality through cultivation, we should pay attention to the following points in our daily education and teaching:

First, praise children to seek truth from facts.

Not simply and rudely denying a child does not mean that you can only say good things. Praise and praise are certainly beneficial to children's growth, but abuse will also be counterproductive. Now most of the only children are in the "four two one" family structure. Parents are busy with work every day. Relatively speaking, grandparents spend more time with their children, especially before they go to kindergarten. Two families spoil a baby, and the child is soaked in "sweet words". It is easy to have "self-centered" elements in his personality, and it will also form an invincible illusion in the family's responsiveness. This seemingly cheerful and optimistic child is actually very fragile. Once something happens after school or is criticized by the teacher, you will become depressed, go from one extreme to the other, think you are useless, and even commit suicide. This is actually the result of parents' inappropriate praise or unwillingness to criticize their children. There are two other children, both excellent students in the first and second grades, with similar grades. After changing the head teacher, I don't know why, he always dislikes one of them, criticizes at will, but praises the other. After a long time, the criticized person felt that no matter how hard he tried, he could not win the favor of the teacher, so he gave up. People who are praised feel that whatever they do can be praised, so they stop trying. As a result, the results of both of them fell to the end. Therefore, when praising students, we should be specific and clear, point out what he has done well, and pay more attention to the performance of will quality and behavior habits. For example, some children don't do well in exams because they spend most of their time answering extra questions. We should see his spirit of overcoming difficulties and exploring. Guiding him on the basis of praising this spirit will be more conducive to the cultivation of children's positive qualities.

Second, before criticizing a child who has done something wrong, we should consider the appropriate way.

The first point of criticizing children is appropriateness. Seligman, an American psychologist, believes that "excessive criticism will cause excessive guilt and humiliation to children, which exceeds the degree of correcting their mistakes. Without criticism, children will lose their sense of responsibility and erase their desire to correct their mistakes. " If a child gets a blow or even a slap in the face because he stretches his muscles a little or whispers to his peers in class, he will obviously not be persuaded to correct it, but he is more likely to "dare to be angry and dare not speak", and he will be resentful from now on, and he will not have to give the teacher a problem at any time. However, it is not enough to turn a blind eye to naughty children in class, because it not only delays one's own study but also affects others' class. In this respect, I admire what Wei Shusheng did: let the students who made small mistakes perform a program, make a fool of themselves, make him a little embarrassed, and let him accept criticism in laughter. Secondly, master optimistic criticism methods, explain problems realistically, and let children understand the specific reasons for their mistakes and understand that their mistakes can be corrected. When criticizing a child, you must tell the truth, don't attack his personality, make him feel useless, and don't worry about it. The old accounts of old sesame seeds and rotten millet have been turned out, which makes students feel that it is useless even if it is changed, because it is branded on it like a brand. After the reform of conduct comments, it is required to write more advantages, first affirm the children as a whole, and then reflect one or two shortcomings in a euphemistic tone, so that children and parents can easily accept and correct them. I think that's the reason.

Third, the correct use of psychological suggestion.

During World War II, a group of soldiers in the United States went to the battlefield. Most of them were "problem youths" with lax discipline and strange behavior. Psychologists sent them a batch of letters, asking them to copy the books to their relatives on time, all of which were words such as observing discipline, fighting bravely and winning prizes. In our opinion, this is obviously a lie, but after a period of time, the "lie" has become a reality, and the soldiers who wrote these letters have indeed become fearless and disciplined. This is actually a psychological suggestion at work. The same example appears on the university campus. The professor asked the students to treat an "ugly duckling" girl in their class like a "white swan", take the initiative to make friends with her, warmly invite her to participate in various activities and praise her sincerely. Later, a miracle appeared: the ugly duckling with low self-esteem and silence really turned into a "white swan", which not only had amazing changes in psychology and appearance. Therefore, in the process of education, we should also use this psychological suggestion method appropriately, and use more positive language and less negative language when evaluating students. For students who are particularly introverted and inferior or other "problem students", not only teachers should be more active, but also other students should be mobilized to care more about them, so that they can be infected with collective optimism and get rid of the influence of bad personality as soon as possible. Here, you must never use the method of isolation or group fighting, because this method has seriously hurt the feelings of the isolated students, making it difficult for him to get rid of the shadow of "poor students" for life; It also distorts the hearts of students who isolate others and makes them tend to be cruel and indifferent. This runs counter to the cultivation of optimism and talent.

Fourth, teachers should set an example.

Children are the best imitators, and they seem to intuitively perceive whether your words and deeds are consistent. Therefore, to cultivate students' optimistic personality, teachers must first have an optimistic spirit. It's easier said than done. Unless you are an optimist, it's hard to change your rigid personality. I didn't consider personality when I chose normal colleges, and there is no such chapter in the textbook. I just heard the word "psychology" from teaching for more than ten years, and new terms such as "English up to standard", "surfing the Internet" and "audio-visual education" followed. There are many old people and children at home, and schools have to compete for jobs. Students and parents do small things from time to time. Think about it, and talk about optimism! But for children and teachers, we must change our way of thinking. In fact, cultivating optimism does not mean changing personality. As mentioned above, it is just a habit of thinking, which can be formed as long as it is adhered to. For example, in the same situation, which of the following ways of thinking or expression do you choose?

If you understand the true meaning of optimism, I believe you can't make a mistake. Language is the shell of thinking, and sometimes language will affect thinking in turn. On the surface, there are only a few words, but the effect is quite different. If we can always remind ourselves to use affirmative statements, we can form our own optimistic thinking. The positive influence of teachers' optimism on students is immeasurable.

Fifth, carry out mental health education for students.

Of course, this is not a task that a single teacher can accomplish, but needs the attention of the school and the whole society. Although the psychological development of primary school students is still in a relatively peaceful period, many psychological problems germinated during this period, and middle school students have reached a stage of drastic changes. For a long time, the lack of psychological knowledge and indifference to psychological problems in the whole society made them have no recourse. Thankfully, with the deepening of people's understanding of mental health, schools have first taken on the responsibility of psychological counseling for students, and many schools have explored their own mental health work models. Among them, mental health education for all students is a very important part, because only by relieving psychological fluctuations and psychological obstacles in time can students form an optimistic and healthy personality, learn knowledge better and become talents who meet the needs of society.

refer to

[1][ Su] Su Homlinski. Compiled by Du Diankun. Advice to Teachers (Quan Yi Book) [M]. Education Science Press, 1984.