What's the difference between parents and children in thinking?

I think there are two aspects, the first is family education, and the second is psychological education.

First of all, before family education, parents will say "study hard to become useful people"; "If you do something wrong, you must dare to take it, and you can't pass the buck at will. Knowing your mistakes is a good boy, because everyone makes mistakes "; "I hope to be able to judge right and wrong. Did you do the right thing to tell me about it? Right, right. Where is it? What's wrong? " ..... In fact, our parents may not have a high diploma, but they will guide us in their own way, let us know the world by ourselves, learn to judge right and wrong by ourselves, bear the consequences of our mistakes, learn from them, and avoid mistakes in the future ... And at that time, we were many brothers and sisters together, talking about fairness (although it was sometimes mixed with "unfairness", that kind of "unfairness" was behind the scenes, and the superficial phenomenon must be.

But what about now? Basically, a family has one child, and one child has six pains, father, mother, grandfather, grandmother, grandmother and grandfather. Grandpa, grandma, grandma, grandpa's love is spoiled, and parents may interfere illegally. Give the child whatever he wants. If he does something wrong, he will understand when he grows up. "Other people's children have no culture, and I don't know how their parents taught them. Look at this grievance of my baby "; "Come on, the children know they are wrong. You're still endless. What else do you want? " Wait, but does the child really know where he is wrong? Is it true that children won't make mistakes next time? They don't know that such a small matter will become an uncontrollable event in the future. They have no idea that after leaving this home, no one will take care of themselves and listen to you like their parents, grandfathers, grandmothers. There is no ability to judge right and wrong when making decisions when encountering things outside. ...

I once met a boy who just left campus in his twenties and took his mother to the company for an interview. During the interview, he introduced his name without saying a word, and then his mother asked about the job content, working hours and salary. Even his mother answered some questions about boys' study and school life during my interview. I still remember my last sentence (when I was recruiting for a sales position): "Auntie. What we are recruiting is a sales position, which is to communicate with people. You always answer all my questions. I think besides your age, you seem to be more suitable for this job than him, but since your age is beyond our recruitment scope, it's a pity that we may not have the opportunity to cooperate ... "As a result, my mother immediately expounded her views. "The child is too young, inexperienced and afraid of being cheated. His children are timid and he has to stay with them. I came out to look for a job this time to exercise him. I hope I can give him a chance ... "But I still refuse to hire such a" giant baby "because I know from past experience that such a" giant baby "cannot be self-sufficient. Once fired, the consequence is that my mother will come to the company to "roll around and search" ...

Therefore, parents' appropriate letting go is also a way for children to grow up. ...

In family education, more should be to guide children to think independently, judge right and wrong, let children know how to respect the old and love the young, know what responsibility is, and be responsible for their own industry ... Many people are considering whether to tell their children about social pressure too early. I don't think it's necessary to say it deliberately, but in daily life, you can tell your child about social pressure and economic pressure through your own behavior, so that he can bear the pressure better.

Second, talk about children's psychological education!

I remember at the beginning of the TV series "Tiger Mom and Tiger Dad", the daughter of the role played by David was spoiled by her grandparents and turned into a "stupid" little princess. She doesn't know what seniority means, and she doesn't know what etiquette means. She just feels that she is above herself and everyone has to obey her own arrangements. What was the result? Finally, because I couldn't accept the change of environment after going to primary school, I began to get sick and got depression.

The child is actually a blank sheet of paper, and the happiness and unhappiness he presents are added by his parents bit by bit. As a parent, after experiencing the cruelty of society, I can understand that they want to give their children a beautiful childhood, and don't touch the ugly psychology of society too early. But when you paint a colorful and beautiful world for your children, have you ever thought about how children will feel once there are discordant colors such as black and gray in this world? After their beautiful world collapses, how will they face the real world? This is why more and more children are suffering from autism, depression, mania and many other diseases that we have never heard of.

So is it really too difficult to be a child? Actually, it's not. It's that our family education is biased and we pay too little attention to children's psychological construction ... Dear parents, think back to your care and guidance for children, and think about whether your's bad mood has passed on negative emotions and negative energy in work or life to children. Is there a lack of sincere communication and understanding between you …