What are the two aspects of children's interpersonal relationship?

The main content of children's interpersonal relationship

2020-11-13 information report

Good interpersonal relationships should start at an early age. What are the main contents of children's interpersonal relationships? The following are some of the contents collected by Xue Xue. Com, I hope I can help you.

The main content of children's interpersonal relationship

Children's social cognitive development is not yet mature, and their empathy for others' thoughts and feelings is not enough. They will naturally have some difficulties when interacting with others. Because the child is not deeply involved in the world, there is no heart, and judging right or wrong is only based on the specific facts at hand. Therefore, children's interpersonal relationships probably have some patterns to follow:

1. Egocentricity: The so-called egocentricity means that a child understands the world with his own thoughts and opinions. He can't be divorced from himself and imagine their thinking angles and feelings from the standpoint of others, which is different from describing the "selfishness" of adults. The word "selfish" means that a person has the ability to understand the thoughts and feelings of others, but he is unwilling to think of others and only considers his own interests. Due to the limitation of children's self-centered development, they often can't share with their peers in turn, but often have conflicts of grabbing.

Second, the principle of reciprocity: children often get along on the basis of reciprocity: "You help me clean the table, I play with you", "You give me candy, I lend you toys", and their friendship is often based on this. It is not the reality of children, but people naturally trust people who are good to themselves.

Third, separation and integration: children's interpersonal relationships sometimes seem very fragile. It seems that a friendship may be destroyed by a little careless words or actions at any time. Therefore, some children often lose good friends inexplicably; However, children's interpersonal relationships are relatively easy to establish. As long as you learn to lend a helping hand at an appropriate time and show concern to others, you will soon make friends. It seems that children are fickle, but they are not. The change of children is unintentional. Their understanding of the world, their views on people, things and things around them, and their trust or distrust depend entirely on their specific personal experiences and visible facts.

Fourth, there is nothing to hide directly: the innocence and directness of children is one of the deepest understandings of every kindergarten teacher. Generally speaking, children will express themselves quite directly with a full sense of security. They will always raise their hands or pull your skirts to share with you his family, his toys, his works and his feelings. If you listen carefully to the dialogue between children, you will also find that they always try their best to share their world with each other, and no one will let anyone; Their feelings and thoughts are reflected in their words and deeds, and there is nothing to hide. In their world, there is often no patience, no waiting, no precipitation.

5. Body replaces language: Because children's language development is immature, they often can't express themselves accurately in language, and then communicate well with others. Therefore, when their needs are not met and they don't know how to express themselves in words, they will naturally "move their hands" to express themselves. In fact, the original intention of these body movements is often simple and harmless, but it always brings great lethality to children's interpersonal relationships.

The influence of children's interpersonal relationship

Although there are some general patterns in children's interpersonal relationships, there are still individual differences among children. Some children are naturally popular and popular there, but some children are always frustrated in interpersonal relationships and stumble all the way. Think carefully about the reasons, probably as follows:

First, the innate temperament is different: each child's innate temperament is different, and the response to the same stimulus is also different. Of course, the feelings and impressions brought to others are different, which in turn affects whether the child is loved by others!

Second, appearance: human ignorance often appears in judging people by their appearances. Strangely, children have a strong learning ability to interpret the appearance of others. They quickly learn to distinguish beauty and ugliness from adults, and use it as an important indicator to choose friends. Many children who are considered beautiful and lovely in our culture have good popularity and no problems in interpersonal relationships.

Third, the labels attached by adults to children: Adults often leave a deep impression on children's behavior and use it as a material to evaluate children's personality, and then attach a label to children once and for all. This label can be positive or negative. But different labels have the same influence, just in different directions! When a child is labeled positively, such as: very sensible, very smart, very caring, naturally, his popularity is also good, and a swarm of children flock to him and want to be friends with him. On the contrary, when a child is labeled with negative labels, such as being naughty, hitting people and stealing things, his interpersonal relationship will naturally deteriorate!

4. Self-esteem: Self-esteem refers to "how one feels about oneself". In fact, self-esteem and interpersonal relationship complement each other. When children have high self-esteem, it shows that they love themselves, feel good, great, loved and confident to make friends. Children with friends and good interpersonal relationships will like themselves more and feel more capable, and of course their self-esteem will also improve. However, when children's self-esteem is low, interpersonal relationships will also go downhill. The more interpersonal relationships go downhill, the lower their self-esteem, resulting in a vicious circle.

Ways to maintain good interpersonal relationships between children

Since interpersonal relationship is so important to children, adults should try their best to help them and let them have good social communication skills from an early age. The following methods can provide reference for teachers and parents to help children establish good interpersonal relationships.

First, provide opportunities for children to share and cooperate, so that every child has the opportunity to express himself and contribute to the group, thus enhancing his sense of self-worth. It is absolutely impossible to cause some children's frustration and inferiority through competition and comparison.

Secondly, through the activities of drama performance, children's representation ability is enhanced, and then children are helped to get rid of the self-centered cognitive stage. In this way, children can be more sympathetic to the needs and feelings of others, and they can also show good behavior of waiting in turn in activities.

Third, introduce more children's books and ballads with the theme of friends and social interaction, so that children can feel the importance of friends and the laughter that friends can bring.

Fourth, pay attention to group discussion and sharing, encourage each child to speak, listen to their words, build their self-confidence and cultivate a sharing attitude.

Five, teachers and parents should set an example, demonstrate the initiative to make new friends, maintain good relations with friends, so that children have a learning object. Never let your behavior run counter to the teaching or requirements of your child, or you will confuse your child's values.

Sixth, the positive social behavior of children should be affirmed and praised immediately, so as to ensure that the behavior is good and can be repeated.

Seven, for children's negative social behavior, we should face them squarely and warn them what is wrong. More importantly, we should teach and guide them to understand the consequences of this behavior and the correct ways to achieve their goals and meet their needs.

Eight, as a safe haven for children, but not as a shield for children. When the child is frustrated, adults must play the role of supporters, provide shelter for the child, and constantly cheer him up and give him the courage to start over. But don't let children rely on difficulties. Encourage children to be independent as soon as possible, solve problems by themselves, and avoid developing a dependent character.

The above methods are aimed at building children's self-confidence and sense of value, improving their empathy ability, so as to have a deeper understanding of their own behavior, learn more friendly social communication patterns, and promote the development of their interpersonal relationships.

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