Italian immigrant joke

1 Who in the world will suddenly get old?

Answer: the bride. Because today is the bride, tomorrow is the wife.

How much is a heart worth?

Answer: 1 100 million. Because of singleness!

How many English letters are there?

Answer: 20. Aids died and ET flew away.

4 where can I never tell jokes?

Answer: the seaside. Because telling jokes at the seaside will cause a tsunami (sea laugh).

How much do I need to bring when I go out in typhoon weather?

Answer: 40 million. Don't go out because there is nothing to do in typhoon weather.

The exam is coming. What books can't I read?

Answer: Encyclopedia (lose all encyclopedias).

8 Why is the penguin's belly white?

Answer: Because penguins' hands are too short, they can only wash their stomachs, not their backs.

Why did a healthy couple give birth to a baby without eyes? [Answer] Chickens lay eggs

If tomorrow is the end of the world, why should someone commit suicide today? [Answer] Have a place in heaven

10 The fat girl is sick. What do you say when someone comes to see her? [Answer] Take care of yourself.

1 1 Question: What are cloth and paper afraid of?

A: cloth is afraid of 10 thousand, paper is afraid of one thousand.

Reason: not (cloth) afraid of 10 thousand, just (paper) afraid of one thousand.

12 Question: What is the pencil surname?

A: Xiao.

Reason: Sharpen (sharpen) the pencil.

13 question: what will Kirin become when it arrives at the north pole?

Answer: ice cream.

Reason: ice cream (iced unicorn).

14 Question: From 1 to 9, which number is the most diligent and which number is the laziest?

Answer: 1 lazy; 2 Diligence

Reason: One (1) does not do two (2) endlessly.

15 question: how to make sparrows quiet?

Answer: Click.

Reason: Silence (silence).

16 question: who runs fastest in history?

Answer: Cao Cao

Reason: Speak of the devil.

17 question: 30-50 which number is worse than bear shit!

Answer: 40

Reason: Facts speak louder than words.

18 question: what should I do if the pigs in the pigsty run out?

Answer: Wang Leehom.

Reason: to coax.

19 Question: What if I come out again?

The answer is: Han Hong.

Reason: Still coax.

20 funny brain teasers-a bear without a tail is a tail bear. What is a bear without a penis?

Answer: Mama Bear.

2 1 Funny brain teaser-September 28th is Confucius' birthday, so 10 What's the date of June 28th?

Answer: Confucius full moon

22 funny brain teaser-the wolf is coming (guess the fruit)?

Answer: carambola (sheep escape)

23 Funny brain teaser-What would the world look like if Jiang Gong (Chiang Kai-shek) were still alive?

Answer: One more person. ...

24 Funny brain teaser-Are there carp (four-word idiom) under these two pieces of ice?

Answer: Be polite (there are carp in the ice).

25 funny brain teaser-why does tofu hurt people?

Answer: Because it is frozen tofu.

26 Funny brain teaser-Is it possible that an ant actually climbed from Sichuan to Tokyo?

Answer: climb on the map

Funny brain teaser-a bus had an accident and everyone was injured. Why is Xiaoming okay?

A: Because he is not in the car.

28 funny brain teaser-there is a place where you can get in but not out. What is this place?

Answer: the grave

29 funny brain teaser-100 meter race chicken and goose run. The chicken runs faster than the goose, but why does it reach the finish line later?

Answer: The chicken ran in the wrong direction.

Funny brain teaser-the bell rings in the east, but there is no one in the classroom. What happened?

Answer: physical education class.

3 1 Funny brain teaser-Why can Xiao Ming stop the car with one hand?

Answer: The car is a taxi.

32 funny brain teaser-Lingling has never studied arithmetic, but the teacher praises her math as one of the best. Why?

Answer: Count from one to two.

Funny brain teaser-What did Columbus do immediately after he set foot on the New World?

Answer: Take the other foot.

34 interesting brain teasers-what makes people keep eating, but they can never get enough?

Answer: air.

35 funny brain teaser-is there any way to make eyebrows grow under the eyes?

Answer: handstand

36 funny brain teaser-what is the thing that makes everyone forget before going to bed?

Answer: Close your eyes.

Funny brain teaser-Some people say that eating fish can avoid myopia. Why?

Answer: Have you ever seen a cat wear eyes?

38 funny brain teasers-what can be added or subtracted?

Answer: age

39 funny brain teaser-what kind of mountains and seas can move?

Answer: A sea of people.

What has no tongue in its mouth?

Answer: teapot mouth

4 1 funny brain teaser-what kind of official can't give orders, but still smiles at others all the time?

Answer: Xin Langguan

Interesting brain teaser-A policeman ran away when he saw the thief. Why?

Answer: I want to catch the thief quickly.

43 funny brain teaser-Xiaoming eats gum every day, and others say he has bad breath. Why?

A: He swears every day.

Funny brain teaser-Why can frogs jump higher than trees?

Answer: Because he stood on the tree and jumped.

45 "You stand with a pig", guess an animal.

Answer: I like it (like it)

It takes six hours from Beijing to Shanghai by train. After three hours of exercise, where should the train be?

A: On the tracks.

Lao Wang has to shave forty or fifty times a day and still has a beard on his face. What is the reason?

Answer: Lao Wang is a barber.

In winter, the baby is afraid of the cold and refuses to take off his hat when he enters the house. But he saw a man take off his hat obediently. Who is that man?

Answer: barber

What flowers can't be touched

Answer: Spark

How long does it take to study at Peking University?

Answer: One second.

5 1 What fruit can't be eaten? Catastrophic impact

A policeman saw a thief. Why did he run away? Because he wants to catch the thief quickly.

Two brothers with the same appearance were drafted into the army at the same time. They are related by blood and have the same date of birth and parents' names. The company commander asked him if he was a twin. They said no, why?

Answer: Two of the triplets

There are two prisoners in the prison. One night, all the prisoners escaped, but the next day, the guards opened the prison door and found another prisoner inside?

A: The name of the fugitive is Du.

What can solve all the mysteries?

Answer: the answer

In today's society, what do most self-employed people who distribute big money rely on to eat?

Answer: mouth

Xiaoming, who is six years old, always likes to break the alarm clock at home. Why does mother always ask her father who can't repair the clock to repair it for her?

Answer: Because mom asked dad to fix Xiaoming well.

When will the clock in Times Square ring 13?

Answer: when it is time to repair.

What is the first thing everyone should do when they wake up in the morning?

Answer: Open your eyes.

A truck driver knocked down a motorcyclist. The truck driver was seriously injured, but the motorcyclist was okay?

Answer: The truck driver didn't drive at that time.

6 1 In ancient times, who became a father-in-law first and then a father?

Answer: eunuch

Xiao Li hurt his face after drinking. When he came home, he was afraid that his wife would blame him. He went to the bathroom and put a band-aid on the mirror, but his wife scolded him the next day. Why?

Answer: The wound sticks to the mirror.

If someone asks for directions, which sentence are you most afraid of hearing?

Answer: Is this the earth?

What kind of competition does the winner get no prize and the loser gets a prize?

Answer: punch in and drink.

When someone knocks at the door, you will never say come in.

Answer: When going to the toilet.

When Xiao Wang stood guard at the post, he clearly saw an enemy quietly touching him. Why did he turn a blind eye?

Answer: aim at the target.

Is it black-bone chicken or white chicken? Why?

Answer: Black chickens are very powerful. They can lay white eggs, but white chickens can't lay black eggs.

Mr Xu made a big mistake. When he reached for his pocket in front of his wife, some bar matchboxes, horse tickets that didn't win the prize, and photos of old lovers were scattered all over the floor. In the panic, in order to avoid quarreling, he immediately covered something with his hand. What will he cover up?

Answer: Cover your wife's eyes.

A tortoise is famous for carrying a cross (four-word idiom)?

Answer: deserved it (cross turtle)

Why do some people like reading comics?

Answer: boring.

7 1 On the bus, two people are having a heated conversation, but the onlookers can't hear a word. What's this about?

Answer: This is a deaf-mute couple.

Mrs. Kim has always been outspoken. What made her suddenly speak hesitatingly?

Answer: Mrs. King hesitates when she eats sugar cane.

People often jump from ten meters high without any safety devices. Why?

Answer: high platform diving

Why does everyone like to sit and watch movies?

Answer: Because it hurts to stand and watch your feet.

What's the impact of canceling morning self-study?

Answer: Sleep less for half an hour.

Please race the tortoise and rabbit, and ask the pig to be the referee. Who will win the game?

Answer: I can't say! The person mentioned is a pig …

What are the similarities between what two women said and what a thousand ducks said?

Answer: Nonsense (chicken)

What is the most important thing besides the admission ticket when taking the entrance exam?

Answer: Remember to get up.

What will men and women become?

Answer: Two people.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?

Answer: The new dog is still very excited to see you a year later.

8 1 A bear without a tail is a tail bear. What is a bear without a penis?

Answer: Mama Bear.

September 28th, 82 is Confucius' birthday, so what is the date of June 28th, 10?

Answer: Confucius full moon

83 Wolf is coming (guess fruit)?

Answer: carambola (sheep escape)

What would the world be like if Chiang Kai-shek were still alive?

Answer: One more person. ...

There are carp (four-word idiom) under these two pieces of ice?

Answer: Be polite (there are carp in the ice).

Why does tofu hurt people?

Answer: Because it is frozen tofu.

Is it possible that an ant climbed from Sichuan to Tokyo?

Answer: climb on the map

A bus had an accident and everyone was injured. Why is Xiaoming okay?

A: Because he is not in the car.

There is a place where you can go in, but you can't come out. What is this place?

Answer: the grave

In the 90-meter race between the chicken and the goose, the chicken runs faster than the goose, but why is it late to the finish line?

Answer: The chicken ran in the wrong direction.

The bell of 9 1 rings in the east, but there is no one in the classroom. What happened?

Answer: physical education class.

Why can Xiao Ming stop the car with one hand?

Answer: The car is a taxi.

Lingling has never studied arithmetic, but the teacher praised her math as one of the best. Why?

Answer: Count from one to two.

What did Columbus do immediately after he set foot on the New World?

Answer: Take the second foot.

There was a pig, who rushed out of the pigsty at a speed of 80M per hour and suddenly hit a tree and died. Why?

Answer: Because pigs don't have brain teasers.

There is a pig and a donkey in the farmer's house. Do you think farmers should kill pigs or donkeys first during the Chinese New Year?

Answer: Would you rather kill the pig (silly pig) or the donkey (donkey)?

One night when you were walking at night, suddenly a wolf came in front and a ghost came behind. You only have a bow in your hand, but only a sword. Do you kill the ghost before giving it back to the wolf?

Answer: Are you shooting a ghost (goat) or a wolf (pervert)?

Why don't temples be built in the southern hemisphere?

Because there is no Amitabha in the south.

99 Mayflower or Lily, which is not born yet?

Mayflower → Because Mayflower toilet paper (unborn)

100 Which anime character is the fattest?

Peter Pan → Because of Fat (Flying) and Fat Peter Pan.

10 1 How to make the sparrow quiet? Answer: Click. Reason: silence.

102 If there is a car, Xiaoming is the driver, Xiaohua sits on his right and Xiaohua sits behind him. Whose car is this? Answer: "If".

103 Four people are playing mahjong in the house. The police came and took five people away. Why? Answer: Because the person they play is called Mahjong.

104 why didn't the plane hit the stars when it was flying so high? Answer: Because the stars will "flash"

One day, a medium-rare steak was walking in the street. Suddenly he saw a medium-rare steak in front of him, but he ignored him.

Why don't they say hello? Answer: Because I am unfamiliar.

106 Two people fell into a trap. The dead call the dead, what is the name of the living? Answer: Call for help.

107 A shark ate a mung bean. What has it become? Answer: mung bean paste (mung bean shark)

108 Is Dandan the name of a puppy or a tiger? Answer: Little Tiger (eyeing)

109 Who is the mother of the chicken? Answer: paper helicopter (paper raw chicken)

1 10 has ABCD...26 letters. How many lETters are left after et left? Answer: 2 1 ETs drove away UFOs.

1 1 What's the name of Feng's child? A: The water rises (the wind rises)

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