Please ask for He Jiong and Ma Li’s New Year FM lines. . Urgently needed ~ Thank you ~ I’ll give points for good ones ~ Absolutely.

New Year FM

Actors: He Jiong, Ma Li, An Renliang (Canada), O'Lillian (USA), Rachel (USA), Jin Guibin, Deng Xianqiang, Yu Dejiang

M: OK, good evening, dear listeners! It is now 21:05 Beijing time. Welcome to listen to "New Year FM" on time. I'm your host Marry. So the topic we want to talk about today is "Things we experienced together in those years". Let's answer the first audience hotline.

Ma: Hello! Hello.

He: Hello! Is it me?

Ma: Hello, sir, it’s you!

He: Hello! Hello! Is it me?

Ma: Hello! Hello! Can you hear me? Hello, sir!

He: Hello!

Ma: Hey! It's you,

He: Is it me?

Ma: Can you hear me?

He: It’s me, no

Ma: Yes, it’s you!

He: Hello! Is it me?

Ma: Yes, it’s you

He: It’s me, no

Ma: It’s you, it’s you, it’s you!

He: Is it me?

Ma: Hey! It's you! It's you, it's you, it's you!

He: It’s me, I am who I am, why are you so loud, girl!

M: Sorry sir, do you have anything to share with you?

He: I am so happy today! Let me tell you, sister, my roommate has raised a baby!

Ma: Ah! Wait a minute, the guest is my wife?

He: Yes, yes, I am a guest.

Ma: Yes, what happened to her?

He: My guest, my guest has teeth!

Ma: Her? Going to kill the duck?

He: No, my cousin has raised a baby!

Ma: Oh, your guest raised a duck, not to kill it. Is it right?

He: It’s not slaughter, it’s not slaughter. oops! It's not a duck, not a quacking duck, it's that yak, that wagging baby. Wow, baby!

M: OK, sir! Sir, don't scream. I know, you are very happy today, there is a happy event at home, and you want to kill the duck, right?

He: I even killed the chicken! What's going on with you girl? Why can’t you understand such standard Mandarin? May I ask who you are as the announcer? Are you an intern?

Ma: No, sir, please listen to my explanation.

He: I think you are the turret of the turret machine!

Ma: No, it’s not that I don’t understand! No, it’s me

He: I want to ask you, why can you still be a teacher with your qualities?

Ma: No, I can’t hear your voice, I can’t hear it!

Ma: Haha, okay, let’s continue the topic we just talked about. So now China’s Spring Festival has become a holiday celebrated by friends around the world. Even our friends abroad couldn’t help but share with us what we had experienced together in those years. Do you still remember the super-born guerrillas back then?

Deng: After observing for a while, I found no enemy situation! Damn it, come here! Damn the kid, fuck the kid! Damn the child!

Rui: Call you grandma.

Deng: Your arrival is too sudden.

Rui: What’s wrong with me? It hurts your self-esteem so much!

Deng: What happened?

Rui: You are hiding here and there all day long, just like a thief. What are you doing?

Deng: Wouldn’t it be fine if you gave birth in two days? Besides, wouldn’t I let you go abroad for a while? Take a honeymoon and get a facelift. Look at this whole thing, with a rumble in the front and a scoop in the back. There is also a digging kiln in the middle.

Rui: Pull him down. He even got plastic surgery. A copycat is a copycat and will never be on the stage. Song Dandan, who was so good, almost suffered facial paralysis due to plastic surgery. She was married for four years and was hiding here and there all the time.

What I eat is steamed buns and porridge. Following you is pure nonsense!

Deng: This is not because our family has wanted a son for generations to take over!

Rui: Pull it down! It’s not appropriate to name a good girl. You have to name Hainan Island, Turpan, and the most irritating one is Lao San

Deng: What the hell is Lao San!

Rui: There is a Shaolin Temple, and a girl is called Shaolin Temple. If she becomes the village chief or something, "Shaolin Temple is holding a meeting" the female host is!

Deng: The name is just a memory. Then my name is Gou Shengzi. Who did I tell you, right? The child’s mother, the child’s mother

Rui: Oops, what’s going on?

Deng: The little detective team is here,

Rui: Really!

Deng: Damn it, you retreat first, I will cover you!

Ma: Wow! It’s really such a classic skit. It brings back a lot of memories for you. OK, this is New Year FM. Let’s answer the next listener’s hotline.

Ma: Hello! Hello. Hello!

He: Is it me?

Ma: Oh my god, why is it you again?

He: Oops, your hotline is so difficult to call. I got through as soon as I called!

Ma: Hahahahaha!

He: Oh, I want to ask you, sister

Ma: Uh!

He: Why did you hang up on me just now?

Horse: Ha! Sir, sir! Sorry, I didn't hang up on purpose just now, it was because the signal was disconnected!

He: I believe it wasn’t you who hung up, because you shouldn’t be able to do such an immoral thing!

Ma: Hehehehe!

He: Let me tell you, there is something very happy in my house. My guest has a baby!

Ma: I know, I know, I know!

He: You are so happy for me too! I called today to order a program.

Ma: So what program do you want to watch on demand?

He: I want to order a song ball

Ma: National ball!

He: Songball

Ma: Uh, table tennis or badminton?

He: How do you listen to badminton?

Ma: Sir,

He: This is a singing ball, not a national ball!

Ma: Sir, that’s it. We are a radio station here and it’s not convenient to broadcast national football on demand. How about you order a sketch?

He: I want to listen to singing songs, I don’t want to listen to any sketches!

Ma: Okay, in response to the strong request of this listener just now, we will immediately play a skit for him. Do you still remember the Queen Mother Restaurant back then? Hahahaha!

Jin: Dear audience friends, Happy New Year! Today our Empress Dowager Restaurant is recruiting Cixi. No, we are recruiting lobby managers. We have a lot of applicants here today, ah! I don’t know what the situation will be like, so I’ll go back and take a look. The next applicant is passed on to come up quickly.

Everyone: Here we come!

Jin: Old lady

Ou: Here,

Jin: Is this the old lady Cixi? This whole package is oh my god, this! Old lady, have you finished practicing?

Ou: I’ve practiced.

Jin: Come on.

Ou: What I cook is... (I can’t hear clearly either)

Jin: Palace Yuye Liquor

Ou: A glass to appetize you

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Jin: I shouted "Beautiful"

Europe: Two cups will save your kidneys

Jin: Haha, still beautiful

Europe: Three After drinking five cups, I guarantee you a smile

Jin: What’s wrong?

Ou: There is red in the red, black in the red

Jin: Yes!

Ou: Hei Bu Liu Qiu

Jin: Ouch!

Ou: Green, blue, and blue

Jin: What color are you looking at? This is your old lady!

Ou: There is so much beauty in the pink!

Jin: Old lady, you scared me!

Ou: Is this wine like this?

Jin: This wine is so beautiful!

He: Beautiful! Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful!

Jin: This wine is so beautiful!

Ou: What’s so beautiful! In fact, it’s the boiled water that Erguotou mixed with it

Jin: Cough! Old lady, why did you sing the truth?

Ou: I have seen black spots, but I have never seen anything without them. Black! Goodbye, sister!

Jin: You are cheating on me, stop!

Ma: OK, welcome everyone to continue listening to our New Year FM. I am the host Marry. So let’s take the last listener line! Bodhisattva bless you, it must not be him, it must not be him, it must not be him!

Ma: Hello! Hello.

He: Hello! Hello, is it me?

Ma: Yes, it’s really not him. Hahahaha

He: Sorry, why are you laughing?

Ma: No, sir, you know, there was a very, very, very interesting listener just now. He wanted to watch the national football on our radio station! What a shame! Ha ha!

He: Two? Two?

Ma: Fuji?

He: Two?

Ma: Fuji?

He: I am the second one, I am the one who watches the national football on-demand! I'm the one who's going to kill the duck. I am that, but I am not.

Ma: Ah, that.

He: Let me tell you, don’t think that we Hunanese can’t speak authentic Mandarin. We just like this local accent.

Horse: Ouch! I'm going!

He: What!

Ma: That, no, brother, that’s not what I meant. You misunderstood me! real.

He: Girl, you’re from the Northeast!

Ma: Yo! I heard it.

He: The taste is quite strong.

Ma: I’m still hugging you tightly.

He: Stop hugging me, let go, we love to hear you speak Northeastern dialect

Ma: Really! Well, brother, I will give you one of our most powerful sketches in the Northeast, "Not Short of Money"

He: I want to listen to the singing ball

An: Sing Little Shenyang

Yu: Hey, Baiyunna, I’m Kurotsuchi, that’s right, hehe, I’m flirting. Oh, I saw it wrong, this is a hotel. Ouch, wasn't it because of my granddaughter's participation in the Spring Festival Gala? How about I come up here? Besides, there are only two clouds in my heart, one white cloud and one floating cloud. Okay, let’s do this for now! Haha, it’s dead. oops.

Yu: Girl, girl!

An: Hey! Oh my god, uncle, who are you calling girl?

Yu: I am calling you

An: I am a pure man. In our foreign dialect, I am a pure man!

Yu: Have you ever seen such a pure foreign man? Hum!

An: Sorry, uncle, we are a high-end hotel and we do not accept agricultural and sideline products

Yu: Boy, you misunderstood, hum, I am here to eat. Let me tell you this, today’s meal is very important. I'll invite the director of the Spring Festival Gala to come to your place for dinner later.

An: Oops! Oh my god, uncle!

Yu: Ah! What does it mean?

An: Do you know the director of the Spring Festival Gala!

Yu: Ah!

An: You can take me to the Spring Festival Gala, you can take me to the Spring Festival Gala, you can take me!

Yu: What are you doing! stop. You are just a person carrying plates and bowls, so why are you attending the Spring Festival Gala?

What other talents do you have? Sing a song

Ann: Listen up! Beat the waist

Yu: Hey! This foreigner can also play tricks. Okay, I'll get a living one. I'm going to lose

An: Singing and walking on stage, beaming with joy, my little segment is only this long!

Yu: It’s over?

An: Ah! How about it?

Yu: Hum, it’s over?

An: Ah

Yu: Great

An: Can we go to the Spring Festival Gala?

Yu: Haha, young man, you can still dress up things when you were young, not bad

An: Hey! Uncle, let me tell you, you may think I am young, but I have concluded that human life is very short. Sometimes thinking about it is the same as sleeping. A day passed with my eyes open and closed. ha!

An: How do you know this?

Yu: Sample, you really think of yourself as a little Shenyang

An: Then let me tell you something Fresh. Do you know what’s the most painful thing about your day at work?

Yu: What is it?

An: It’s almost time to get off work and the work is not finished yet

Yu: What is the most painful thing about a day at work?

An: What is it?

Yu: I haven’t gotten off work yet. The work is done!

An: What is the most painful thing about your day at work? It’s because I can’t live when I’m at work, but I can’t live until I get off work

Yu: The most painful thing about a day at work is

An: I don’t believe you still have the words

Yu: Oops! ah!

An: You said

Yu: I have no job at work, and no job after get off work. When I get home from work and my wife and kids are getting ready to go to bed, I suddenly get a call telling you that I have no job!

An: Master, I bow to my disciple

Yu: Hey! What do you mean, what do you mean, alas! It's over, it's over!

An: Take me to the Spring Festival Gala

Yu: It’s over, it’s over!

An: Take me there,

Yu: Finished

An: Master