Parents: All my efforts are to cultivate you

Watching TV that day, a 9-year-old boy was watching the children's talent show on CCTV Opera Channel. After the show, he looked relaxed and happy, waiting for guests to comment. At this time, it is time to tell a tragic story. The guests shed tears and the audience shed tears. The children's fathers were invited to the stage, saying that they came from a small mountain village in Guizhou and set up a stall in Beijing to train their children, so that they would have the opportunity to receive education in big cities and achieve something in the future. Before, my brother couldn't stand such harsh training and has returned to his hometown. Now my brother is still insisting.

When the guests heard this, they all said that Dad was really something. He must have suffered a lot to raise his children. It's not easy to have a baby. My brother can't stand going home. He is still insisting. He is not afraid of hardship and fatigue. Well done. A guest was moved and began to be merciful, saying that I can give you free class guidance, and you can come to me if you have any difficulties in your life in the future. All four of us (guests) are willing to help you. The scene was full of love and emotion, and the child finally got a perfect score of 5 stars.

0 1

Seeing this, I can't help but want to scold my mother. Are these values correct? Why does CCTV promote such a story? Is it to let all parents in the world set up stalls, make a living and support their families by cheap labor, and label themselves as "good parents in China"?

First of all, I want to say that you can only prove that you are incompetent by setting up a stall for a living, but you can't prove that you have the spirit of hard work.

Forty years old, setting up a stall should not be your only way out. Do you really have no other skills than setting up a stall? Just opening a recruitment website is a lot of industry recruitment: sales, customer service, drivers, salespeople, assistants, general workers, editors, electricians, accountants, mechanics, logistics, carpentry, photography, moving … Why not do these things? If some thresholds are higher, have you tried to repair a home appliance, sell a pancake, be a shopping guide and send a courier to promote a product? If you can't do it, think about why you can't. Because you are incompetent? Forty years old, I don't have any skills except setting up stalls, but I have to label myself as "very hard". Why not reflect on why I can only make money so hard? Why did you leave before you were forty? Now Bo sympathizes with paying for your hard work before you turn 40. Why?

02

The child's father said that he tried to set up a stall to make money in order to train the child. He wants his children to have a bright future and is willing to suffer as much as possible. For the sake of children, he is very strict with children, hoping that children can understand their father's intentions. At this point, the smile on the child's face has long since disappeared and turned into crying. I don't know if this crying is because I am moved by my love for my father, or because my family situation is so naked and forced to stand in front of him and everyone, making his original simple, happy and confident day stressful. I prefer to believe the latter.

China's parents want their children to be dragons and phoenixes among the people, and this expectation is correct in itself. However, most parents are not happy because their children become excellent people themselves, but greedy for the aura brought by their children's Excellence-they regard their children as a weight to add luster to their lives and hope to change their lives through their success. Such parents are not good parents. Your life is your own, and so is your child's life. If you want to make your life brilliant and successful, please try your best to win it. Don't push away your laziness and let your children overcome it for you.

03

Back in the program, the father of the child used his own efforts to encourage the child to study hard, which could not play a long-term role. The pressure of family difficulties would make the child unbearable sooner or later. The pressure from his father will consume a lot of his energy. Under such pressure, how can children learn easily and build self-confidence? Generally, most people will encounter bottlenecks and everyone will disappear. At this time, his father's disappointment will make him even more deny himself and blame himself, and life will be bleak from now on.

As a parent in your thirties and forties, is your life really settled? Are those who are troubled by work project leaders' entertainment, interpersonal relationships, family chores and supporting their families unable to think about life planning and improve themselves? Or are you content with the status quo and too careless about fighting for it yourself? So the excuse is to cultivate children as your "selfless contribution" to children? Please believe me, children don't need such parents, and children don't need to be the center of the family. Parents should have their own lives, although they are thirty or forty years old, do they count as half their lives? Will you stay where you are? You still have to have a motivation not to admit defeat to your age and learn upward. Children will be infected by your spirit and write the most wonderful life with you. He will understand that at any time, at any age, there are infinite possibilities in life. This is the motivation that can motivate children to go up for a long time.

Therefore, parents should stop saying: All my efforts are to cultivate you. As children, we are afraid. Raising children is just a part of your life. You can live another life for yourself.