Don't trap the child with a mold.

"I'm doing it for you" is an excuse we often use, and it is also a model of Chinese parental education.

The sentence "I am doing you good" often comes from parents, and their intentions are often good, so when this sentence comes out of their mouths, we must think it over. Otherwise, once we don't listen to their suggestions, they will feel wronged and dissatisfied: I am doing him good, why doesn't he appreciate it?

Last week, I heard his daughter talking about this year's college entrance examination in the leadership office, and invited subordinates to the office to consult about the application.

My daughter is going to take the college entrance examination soon. She is very interested in physics and has good grades. She wants to enter the college entrance examination majoring in physics. But the father and daughter disagreed and had to follow the advice of their subordinates.

He believes that his daughter will be admitted to the 985 college, but it is a bit strange for a girl to study physics. It's hard to find a job after graduation, and I don't want her to suffer so much. I will return to work with her after graduation, or I will tend to let her apply for Chinese major. After graduation, you can take the civil service exam, as steady as Mount Tai. what do you think?

"The leaders are talented and far-sighted." Subordinate nodding.

Of course, leadership is leadership, and it is really a rainy day, not only at work, but also in children's education.

Parents are really sad. They didn't even take the exam, and felt that their daughter's life roadmap was very clear.

Actually, I am no exception. I was very interested in literature and history in high school, and my grades were ok. Generally speaking, I should choose to study liberal arts. However, when I was faced with the choice of arts and sciences in my second year of high school, my father jumped out and said to me, "Arts is not good for employment. Studying science and engineering is very popular now, and it is best not to study liberal arts. " Employment after graduation from college is a big problem, which is also true, so I chose to study liberal arts according to what others said.

Because of the serious partiality and poor physics, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't keep up with the thighs of popular science, and finally I was badly dumped.

In desperation, I went to a university that I was not satisfied with and chose a major that sounded like I could earn a lot of RMB-project cost. A seemingly popular major is full of "bitter water". I haven't been engaged in professional-related work since graduation. Fortunately, writing has given me strength and may accompany me further.

Many times, the development of things tends to be the opposite of the original intention of design. When I was a child, my family was poor, and my parents beat and scolded me to make me study hard, so that I could work in the office all day without having to work as hard as them. But now my parents see that I am really sitting in the office to work, but I am always more tired than them, and often regret that I should not be allowed to read so many books; My friend used to tell her daughter to study hard and not to fall in love, but her daughter didn't have a boyfriend after graduation, so she urged her to fall in love and get married all day. Some friends saw that everyone around them sent their children abroad to study, and they joined the ranks. When the children really leave, I realize how painful life is without them. (Excerpted from Qin Chunhua, Dean of Peking University Examination and Research Institute, "Does it make sense for parents to design life for their children?"

Some time ago, a friend told me about the "color change" of feelings. For this, my father's "three chapters of the contract": the future son-in-law must pass me first, be no less than me in height, have a face value and a responsibility, and ask for more money. The family is an only child, otherwise I won't recognize you as a daughter.

A friend said that there are many boys chasing her, and one of them likes it himself. Once, she sent a photo to her father, and she never even met him. She stopped her with a word and told her not to associate again, let alone talk about "getting on the bus to make up the ticket", otherwise the father and daughter would break up.

In fact, the truth is this: children whose parents have been fighting with others for more than 20 years have the best study, and they feel that they have won. Their children didn't know until they graduated from work that they were still inferior to the children of coal bosses in life. Now they think they can fight for their children's marriage, so they do everything possible to hinder their normal feelings and want to find a rich man ... "

Marriage is like this, and work has a fixed look.

20 12, an article entitled "Do your parents think so? It was posted on the anonymous section of Peking University anonymous BBS. The author of the post wrote in the post: "I graduated from Xiaoshuo this year and found a job with a starting salary of more than 8,000 yuan/month and some bonuses at the end of the year. There is still room for improvement in the future. More than enough. I don't expect much from material things. But my dad has long boasted in front of relatives, that is to say, I earn millions every year without any pressure ... After knowing my quotation, he even swore at me, thinking that I had humiliated him ... He made a lot of phone calls to harass me ... He also said that students from Peking University would be mayors and governors ... "

Parents like to plan their children's lives, pave the way and make decisions for them. For a time, the appearance of various figures such as "the second generation of officials", "the second generation of stars" and "the rich second generation" became the focus of hot discussion in various media. Parents cover up their children, radish recruitment and so on occupy the headlines of various news pages, flouting social fairness and justice and causing an uproar.

Life is not a fixed investment and many variables are unpredictable. In the final analysis, children's life without choice is only to copy the design in their parents' minds into reality-at most, it has been strengthened, but as the protagonists of life, they have lost the right to steer and the real confidence to face setbacks and difficulties. Don't use a mold to trap your child, and let him be what live high wants!