Mona, United Immigration Bureau

Your children and I have similar backgrounds. I am also a working family and went abroad at the age of 17. So your consideration is the same as my mother's.

People upstairs actually speak very well. I shouldn't have said too much, but I was touched by your daughter's situation. Let me just say something.

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I'll say some opinions first, and then answer your question.

As parents, we should objectively evaluate our children and fully understand her. After all, a child has too many immaturities and imperfections. You should measure her as a stranger, so that you can plan her going abroad accurately. An inaccurate plan will lose a lot. From what you said, I think you understand this. For a child, to be independent early, there will be too many unstable factors. Moreover, all kinds of life are already half of the society, and everything must be done by yourself. If she is not strong enough, it will be difficult to cross. There are all kinds of temptations in society. You should judge your children. If she faces them, can she resist them? I have seen examples of foreign students being too young. Some people can't stand the pressure of life, so depressed that they vomit blood (if they really vomit blood to the hospital, their personality is not suitable for going abroad), while others can't stand the temptation and go astray. Parents sometimes have too much confidence in their children's abilities, which is likely to ruin her.

You didn't say how your children are studying. If so, you should send her to a good school as much as possible. If it is normal, don't expect too much from her. Because even if she enters a good school, it is difficult to graduate, and the pressure will be great for the environment that is not suitable for her. Therefore, the school that suits her best is a good school.

1。 Personally, I think it's not good to see someone recommend New Zealand before. Because the school spirit of private schools in New Zealand is not good, the comparison is serious. We international students have exchanged experiences, and most people who have studied in New Zealand have told me that the school spirit in New Zealand is not good. So I am definitely not a good environment for a small international student.

Scholarship, you have to see how your children learn. Good is hope. Don't think about it if it's not good. Scholarships are not easy to apply for.

If there is a charge, I will give you a data, which was given by my agent when I went abroad in 2004. The data are UK/US 100W, Canada 60W, New Zealand, Australia and Northern Europe 40W, Singapore 30W, Malaysia and Thailand 25W. This is probably the total cost for your child to go abroad at the age of 17 and graduate from college. However, they are all conservative estimates. In general, it will increase by about 10W.

I think Singapore is quite suitable for your children. My mother thought about sending me for a long time, because Singapore's legal system is relatively sound and it will be safer for girls. And the cost is not so high, and in China society, English can hardly die. But recently my mother told me that she regretted sending me to Singapore because I didn't learn English well in Singapore. She said that she should send me to a European country. But personally, I think this choice is still very good.

If you can share my mother's worries, maybe you can send her to Canada, which was my second choice at that time.

2。 Independence is one thing. What is her ability to face the society? Take me for example. Because of my personal problems, I have stayed in the society for a long time and have some social experience. When I arrived in Singapore, I found that the domestic planning was not suitable for me, so I was under great pressure. I had to transfer to another school, choose a road that was more suitable for me, deal with the problems left over by the original school, and communicate with the Immigration Bureau. At that time, people really fainted, and there was no one to help, so I had to rely on myself (because I was going to transfer, and my guardian was an intermediary, so naturally I wouldn't care). As a result, I met a professional swindler who cheated China students. Last year's big case cheated more than 30 students. I am one of them. At that time, I was very helpless, thinking that I had caught the life-saving grass, and I believed them impatiently. Although I video with my family every day, they always remind me what to pay attention to and not to be cheated. But they don't know what I have here, and they can do nothing but remind them. The result was cheated 1W5. . . . . I am really ashamed of my parents.

Another time, I trusted my friend too much. She had an accident and I lent her 5000. Then she disappeared. This is not a scam. She is only 19 years old, and she chose to escape in the face of 5000 yuan. If she were your child, would you be heartbroken?

So your children will face such a thing in the future. You and your children should be mentally prepared.

They are both from China.

Speaking of equal treatment. I think even in China, there will be inequality in different places, not to mention abroad. However, those who respect themselves are respected by all, and those who humiliate themselves are humiliated by all. When I first went abroad, I always felt very inferior, and sometimes I would swallow the discrimination. But now I won't. As an international student in China, why should I feel inferior? I want to be confident, so if I meet an unfriendly person again, I will respond unkindly. I look down on those who are inferior to me. In this way, I have rarely met people who look down on me again.

It is helpful to this problem. I think your worry is reasonable, but it is better to perfect your idea. In society, it is enough for others not to harm you. If you want to help, it's help, and if you don't, it's natural. What your children should learn most is to be strong, but learning and life are second. Like me, minor ailments can be solved by themselves. If it's a minor illness, see a doctor again. If there is any serious illness, friends, classmates, teachers, landlords, etc. Anyone who shares a room can ask for help. After all, there are many good people. As long as your child has the courage to face the problem by himself, there will be no big problem. Moreover, foreign ambulances are still very dedicated, and it is no problem to have enough money. If there is an emergency, you can't hide it. If the intermediary is the guardian, it is basically unlikely to help her too much. After all, intermediaries still look at money. However, some conscientious intermediaries are not excluded.

3。 The situation in each country is different. Take Singapore as an example. To attend a public school, she has to take an O-level course or an A-level course first, and then take the unified examination in Singapore. People with good grades can enter public schools. This is my original plan. I overestimated myself and didn't understand the environment. I think I can improve my English in Singapore. As a result, I wasted a year's time, energy and money, so I still have to settle for the second best.

4。 I have answered this question in detail about whether it is good to go abroad. Let's talk briefly here.

The key is to look after your children. She is competent enough, so it's good to go abroad. After exercising her, she will mature earlier. But if the ability is not enough, you will run around abroad, waste a lot of hard-earned money, and return to China with nothing. There are many such examples around me. There are many reasons, such as wasting money, lack of self-control, degeneration, physiological and psychological factors. Some shortcomings in their character and ability led to the deviation of the route.

Therefore, the judgment of good or bad lies not in objective things such as the environment, but in herself. As long as it suits her path.

I hope it will be helpful for your consideration and planning. If you have any questions, you can contact me. If you are still confused, you can also talk to my mother.

May your children grow up healthily. I also hope that you can treat your children absolutely calmly and objectively.

Finally, let me show you something I saw a few days ago. This is also a warning to your children. This situation is not uncommon. They are just a little deviation in moral values. There is nothing wrong, but as a mother, if her children are like this, they will be sad, right?

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